Once A Soap Star, Always In A Soap Fan's Heart
What does it say about me, as a person, that the first thing I thought upon watching Clay Aiken cover Kelly Ripa's mouth with his hand was "How dare he step to Hayley Vaughan? Does he not know that her father is Adam Fucking Chandler?"
(a)That I am deranged
(b)That I need to get out more
(c)That Clay Aiken in and of himself is so creepy that he causes people to lose sight of the line between fiction and reality?
Obviously, the answer is (c).
As I watched the internet implode from the pressure of a million Claymates (WARNING: LINK NOT SAFE FOR LIFE), I became outraged on behalf of Kelly Ripa.
I should just say it: I love Kelly Ripa. I do. I think she's adorable. She's completely cheesy and is a total goober, she seems to live life habitually jacked up on Mountain Dew and her kids have stupid names, but I don't care. I loved Hayley on AMC, and I loved Hayley and Mateo, and because of that I will never totally hate the AMC Santos family, even if their presence in Pine Valley totally sucks right now* (JULIA!**).
(I am a sucker for soap stars doing well in general. I should take this moment to give big ups to the casting department at Veronica Mars for giving former daytime stars some love, including David Tom and Robyn Richards. Edited to Add: And OMG Charles Shaughnessy tonight, too! OMG!)
I also LOVED Ms. Ripa's SNL spoof of her shampoo ads. I did. I thought it was funny. I also think it's awesome that she is such a good sport about Amy Poehler's impersonation of her. Should I keep gushing?
(I understand that I must turn in my cool kid card now)
So I am totally on TEAM RIPA in her battle against Rosie O'Donnell and Clay Freaking Aiken. I'm a big proponent of personal space, and if anybody put their hand on my mouth to shut me up, I would probably bite them, or at least hurl obscenities in their general direction. I thought Kelly's response was quite restrained, actually, and not homophobic in the least, so whatever, Rosie. Clay's fear of evil cat spirits has also inspired me to adopt a kitten. So suck on that, Aiken!!
(Am I going to get sued for that?)
To further my TEAM RIPA agenda, let's watch some classic Hayley clips:
*Although what doesn't suck now on AMC? Only Kendall, Zach and adorable Spike dressed like a pilgrim. But when will that poor child get a real name?
**When did Sydney Penny become so lame? When?!