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« My Brain Hurts | Main | Unacceptable! Days of Our Lives Week in Review »

April 05, 2007

Let's Have a Moment of Silence

Today's episode of The Young and the Restless was the most tragic in recent memory. Every second, from beginning to end, was harrowing.

TRAGEDY
 
I can say with absolute certainty that this show is going to be empty without Victoria Rowell. Who else will be heartbreakingly fierce? Who else will be adventurous with hats and headwraps? Who else will store their cell phones in their cleavage?

 
I hope everybody who works for this show feels guilty about not giving Ms. Rowell the respect she deserves just for being awesome. Sure, she deserves respect for being an outstanding actress, for carrying the show for most of the past year and for refraining from vomiting all over Christel Khalil, but she mostly deserves it for being awesome. We'll miss you, Victoria!
 
TRAGEDY

That's the best they could do? A cliff? A CLIFF?! Is it 1987 again and nobody told me? That's the last time this story was original. Not to mention, did they create those smashing special effects in Microsoft paint? That "river", especially, fascinates me. I keep staring at it, dumbfounded. That's a watercolor painting. I am pretty sure that they have been blowing their budget on Don Diamont's Mystic Tan and Sharon Case's weaves.

TRAGEDY
 
How much more poignant would Lily's heartbreak have been if Lily were still portrayed by an actress who could act? Much more. Like a million times more. Her open mouthed "Noooooo!" was delivered with all of the emotion of my similar open mouthed "Nooooo!" when I burned myself on my flat iron this morning. That is to say hammy and not to be done in front of other people, let alone on television.
 
 
TRAGEDY

I guess it sort of sucks when your mother gets into a fight with two ladies on the edge of a cliff and two of them fall over the cliff and one of them is your wife's mother, but I guess it sucks even more that you are doing this and watching your wife sob instead of watching porn. Poor Daniel.

TRAGEDY

This child has a job that requires him speaking and interacting with human beings. I am not convinced that he is not an android. Watching him try to speak the English language is like watching George and Izzie have sex on Grey's Anatomy. Horrific. Is he a contest winner? Does he pay producers to act on the show? Because he's not okay. You could visibly see Tracey Bregman losing her will to live as the show went on.

TRAGEDY
 
Don Diamont is the star of the show. I can read that sentence and I know what all of the words mean, but it might as well be foreign, because it makes no sense to me. Not only can he not act, but his character is repulsive. What kind of a person flaunts his obsession with another woman in front of his pregnant wife?

 
TRAGEDY
 
Even angry, Neil remains boring. When he heard that his wife's arch enemy played a part in her going over the cliff obviously purchased at the dollar store, he asked "What did you do?! I asked you a question", with all of the passion of a man asking his dog why his slipper was chewed. And you just know he was immediately like, "Lily, I'm sorry you had to see me so enraged. I'm so ashamed of myself".

- Promising Ingénue

Comments

Oh, Drucilla. Why? WHY?

There is no other character on any soap that could have afro puffs and actually pull them off.

I suppose we'll have to endure the Phyllis and Brad Smile Time Variety Hour (featuring Sharon).

I'm honestly trying to figure out who I'm going to be rooting for on this show. I suppose it's going to be the Fisher Clan, who are completely immoral, yet strangely watchable (bug-eyed Gloria and all). Maybe Lauren can do something interesting again... besides being attacked by Shelia (which is frankly her only purpose on this show).

There's always Katherine and Jill and the painfully dull yet painfully hot Cain (or Cane or Phillip). That could be interesting if Amber wasn't around.

The one good thing about Dru is dying is the fact that we'll get to see Olivia again... wait a minute. I just realized how boring the prospect of Olivia, Neil, and Lily on screen together actually is.

Where's Mamie when you need her?

I have not watched Y&R since the early 90s, but I tuned in just to see for myself what this blog was alluding to. HOLY CRAP, that was *bad*. Worse special effects since the big fire on GH. And what was up with Lilys scream playing on a constant loop? Ridiculous.
Happy to see that Tracy Bregman still looks fabulous, though.

LOL! You are SO hilarious! I've just randomly found your page while looking for old school info on Kevin and Lily (for a Y&R trivia contest) and I found yours. I must say I am VERY happy I did because your recaps are TOO entertaining! Keep em coming, I'm officially a fan!

I cannot believe Y&R killed the black bitch of daytime by having her go over a cliff. Dru was the heart of the Winters family and the premiere schemer in Genoa City. She has so many storyline possibilities, she could have been the one who discovered Gloria's GloAgain scandal, had Phyllis arrested for extortion, been tempted to have an affair. Dru made that show, and now it will go up in flames until she returns.

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