The Year's Most Awesome Dialogue
In Bob Guza's immaculate corner office, a tired, pale writer walks in, warily looking around at the Steve Burton posters adorning the wall and approaches Guza, who is sitting at his desk, absentmindedly playing Solitaire.
AWESOME WRITER: Um, Bob? Do you have a second?
BOB GUZA: Oh, look who it is! What's goin' on? You look really pale. Maybe you need Kelly to take you to Mystic Tan...
AWESOME WRITER: I'd probably have more color if I was ever let out of my office...
BOB GUZA: Pardon?
AWESOME WRITER: Never mind. So, I've been thinking: you know what this show needs more of?
BOB GUZA: Rape?
AWESOME WRITER: No.
BOB GUZA: Mobsters?
AWESOME WRITER: No.
BOB GUZA: Carly?
AWESOME WRITER: God, no. I was actually thinking we need more Georgie.
BOB GUZA: What the hell is a Georgie?
AWESOME WRITER: Frisco and Felicia's daughter?
BOB GUZA: The slut?
AWESOME WRITER: No, the other one.
BOB GUZA: Oh, right, the other one. What about her?
AWESOME WRITER: You know, we just never see her. I was thinking we can maybe put her with Spinelli and have her, uh, be, maybe, his conscience about wanting to be part of the mob.
BOB GUZA: Why on earth would anybody try to dissuade someone from being part of the mob?
AWESOME WRITER: Because it's illegal, immoral and done to death, no pun intended, on this show?
BOB GUZA: Okay, you're going to have to explain why that's a problem.
AWESOME WRITER: ...
BOB GUZA: Fine, you can write a scene for Gina or whoever. But on one condition--you have to dress her as unflatteringly as humanly possible. Wardrobe has some stuff obviously purchased in Dress Barn in 1998. Put her in that and you've got a deal.
AWESOME WRITER: ...sigh.
And that, dear readers, is how we came to hear the most amazing bit of dialogue spoken on GH:
Let's be honest -- he kills people for Sonny...Even if all the people that Jason's ever killed deserved it, it is still a relentlessly negative, destructive way to live your life.
Thank you for fighting the good fight, Awesome Writer!!!