There's a lot to say about AMC lately, like how I don't understand a lot of it. Is there a point to Hannah? Why is Richie so awesome? How am I supposed to enjoy the foxiness of Aidan when he's all chummy with Ryan (and the whole lynching thing)? Why did the world think it was fair to give Alicia Minshew so much pretty, leaving the rest of us to duke it out over scraps of middling attractiveness?
And I'll get to that, but first I have to ask: Double You Tee Eff, Jacob Young? What the hell is that oily, feathered monstrosity you call a hairdo and why on earth hasn't someone forcibly held you down to get rid of it?
You might say that we at Serial Drama are obsessed with hair and, perhaps, take bad hairstyles a little too seriously. And to that we reply, yes, we are obsessed with hair and there is no such thing as taking bad hairstyles a little too seriously, because they are so very bad that they actually interfere with the viewing process!
Like, during All My Children today, I couldn't even pay attention to the complexities of the Zach/JR plot to bring Greenlee down. I have no idea what the plot even is. If you were to tell me "So then JR is going to dress up like Henry VIII and pelt Greenlee with vegetables while Zach tap dances menacingly", I'd think it was unconventional, but I'd probably believe you.
Because all I can see when JR is onscreen is his horrible, horrible hair.
From the side, I can't even tell who Zach is talking to. My first assumption was that Dixie was back from the dead and they were brunching together.
And I hoped she had learned her lesson and was staying away from pancakes! But then the camera angle shifted and I realized that it was JR.
If that doesn't send a deep shudder of revulsion down your spine, you're a cyborg who hasn't had a fashion sense chip implanted.
Seriously, though, I'm having a hard time with the Slater revenge schemes. For starters, I have no idea what Kendall's scheme is and since she's taken a long sabbatical from being a lunatic, I don't have faith that it will be a good one. She said she loved Babe, for heaven's sake, I think her plotting skills are obviously going to be a little rusty. And Zach's plan is horrific, not least because the idea of Greenlee/Ryan babies still terrifies me (despite the scary hair, JR did have a hilarious line with "You mean there could be Ryan and Greenlee babies running around all over the place?"It wasn't so much the line itself as it was the disgusted out way Jacob Young said it) I understand that revenge schemes are supposed to be horrific and that Greenlee obviously deserves Kendall and Zach's hatred, but, I don't know...I think that the writers have decided that Greenlee is going to be fully redeemed, so these plots are going to be fruitless and, in all likelihood, will just make Zach and Kendall look evil and make Greenlee the wronged party. Which is, of course, fucked up, but it is AMC, where very little makes sense.
Really, Aidan? Really? All of a sudden we're just going to assume that Richie was always evil and evilly drowned his friend when they were teenagers because he wanted the friend's Mickey Mantle rookie card?
1. I am pretty sure that exact plot was lifted from one of the Law and Order shows. Actually, I think I just combined the episode where a gymnast killed another gymnast because she was jealous of presents she was getting from her sugar daddy with the episode where a group of girls, spurred on by their teenage Manson friend, drowned a group of boys for using them at sex parties, but whatever, that motive would so be used on one of the Law and Order shows!
2. The only reason anyone thinks poorly of Richie is because Annie said so (and also the lying about who he really is, which, of course, does earn him a demerit). And sorry, but I have a hard time taking the word of someone so bland and robotic.
3. I would expect someone with Richie's cunning, kickassedness to murder people for better reasons. Mickey Mantle rookie card? Weak. I know they're valuable, but that's lame.
4. If Richie did kill his friend...so what? Jonathan killed a bunch of people, including EDMUND (!!!), poisoned Greenlee, kidnapped Greenlee, Kendall and Lily, pretended to be mentally challenged to stay married to an autistic teenager, etc. One tiny little homicide is nothing compared to that! I find it exceedingly wrong that Annie keeps apologizing for having a crazy brother and Ryan just sits back and lets her say she's sorry all the while doing nothing about the menace to society that they call Jonathan.
But, hey, if Richie's going to be evil, I do hope they continue to go all out with him. Because, as I think I have mentioned, he's kickass.
And he made the credits!
So, Amanda Baker as Babe...
Aside from the fact that her picture for the opening credits was obviously taken at Glamour Shots
...I don't hate her! I mean, I don't like her, but in a week's worth of episodes she's managed to piss me off less than Alexa Havins and also be less annoying than she was on Night Shift. Well played, Amanda.
For some reason, I've having less trouble buying the whole "Babe is sweetness and light and LOVE" with her in the role. I think it's because Alexa Havins just radiates smug bitchiness and Amanda Baker has a pretty sweet, if vacant looking, face. I'll never like Babe, but I'm not retching at the very sight of her, which is an improvement.