This Effing Show

There was a time in my life when I thought that the ridiculous decision to reveal that James Craig is actually a short, blonde, face transplanted Jerry Jacks was the dumbest thing that General Hospital had done in years and that they'd need to exert considerable effort in order to top that.

And we all know that the GH powers-that-be exert effort as often as they give screentime to Jacklyn Zeman. After all, WHY write for a dozen characters when you can just have the same four people have the same conversation every day? And WHY write stories about women being strong and independent when you can just use scripts from the 1950s and have women on your show solely to be victims or incubators? And WHY dress your cast in clothes that seem like they could be sold in actual stores when you can instead borrow hats from kindly grandmothers?

But that was foolish. Because the GH powers-that-be DO sometimes work hard to do something and when they do it, they are unfailingly committed to it. Unfortunately, that "something" is not "creating an entertaining, engaging soap opera" but is, rather "rewrite history with a blatant disregard for medical science, an overriding lack of originality and a massive amount of disrespect for the audience watching at home".

This is a lengthy way of saying that I despised today's big reveal of the Text Message Killer. That's the best they could do? In the words of Cam, "Bitch, please".

I had been convinced that the TMK was going to be Coop, which I thought was stupid.

Then it seemed like the TMK was going to be that creepy guy at Kelly's, which I also thought was stupid and really, really lazy.

And then for three minutes it seemed like it was going to be Logan, which, surprisingly, I also thought was stupid, because, seriously, why waste the ingenious casting of Josh Duhon as Kin Shriner's son just to make him a serial killer? I realize that I'm expecting a lot of the evil Guza/Phelps/Frons union by asking them to use that sort of earth logic, but even for them, it would be stupid.

But DIEGO?

I just...I thought GH was better than that. Which isn't saying much, but still, even for them, it's just...pitiful.

For starters--and I say this as a longtime soap fan who knows that dead rarely means dead and instead usually means "hiding somewhere and getting a new personality and/or face"--we saw him get shot. We saw his shooting lead to the single most embarrassing onscreen moment of Ted King's career. I had tried to repress it. Some things are best left unremembered and that is one of them.

Secondly...this insane instance of history rewriting is not only RIDICULOUS but UNORIGINAL as they have already ONCE thrown Diego under the bus and declared him the perpetrator of a crime that they obviously didn't intent on him being responsible for at the outset of that story. Remember when he was a stalker who drugged college girls and took pictures of them in a bizarre and terribly written way to get revenge on them for what they did to Sage? What did Ignacio Serricchio do to these people?  He's so very pretty, is it possible that they are jealous of him because of it? Their hatred of Kelly Monaco, Greg Vaughan and Jason Thompson does indicate an anti-hot people bias. I will have to research this theory of mine more, with lots of time spent looking at screencaps.

I really feel like the only way I could hate this storyline more is if the TMK was actually not Diego Alcazar but instead Diego of Go, Diego, Go fame.

It's like the writers said, "We probably shouldn't have the serial killer be a vet, because it might send the message that we really hate vets, what with all of the instances of vets on our show being crazy and violent and evil, so Coop and Logan are out. But who would be really shocking? Hmm...oooh, I know! Someone who is DEAD! That would COMPLETELY shock people. Maybe...hmm. This is tough. We could have it be AJ, but I'm sort of uncomfortable having that many Quartermaines on the show. We just whittled it down to Monica and Edward, you know? Bringing AJ back would be Quartermaine overload. Too bad Stephen Nichols is on Days, or else we could just have it be Stefan. And damn, why did we have to make it clear that it was a man? We could have explained it away as another wacky Helena scheme. Oh! We can just use whatshisface. That guy. We always use to blame stuff on him. Awesome. Daytime Emmy, here I come!"

On the one hand, this is typical GH and I really shouldn't even be irritated about it, much less angry, and yet here I am, completely pissed off at the writers and producers of this show, because, seriously? The only way it could be more apparent that they had no idea who the TMK was at the start of the story would be to have the words "We totally pulled this one out of our ass, guys, thanks for watching! Buy Campbell's Soup and drink V-8! XOXO, GH Writers" written on a scroll at the bottom of the screen.

It's insulting, really. They killed off Emily Quartermaine and Georgie Jones, two legacy characters who could drive story for decades to come, as part of a murder mystery and they couldn't even be bothered to do justice to these longtime characters and decide at the outset who was going to kill them. Nice. Instead of keeping this show on the air, why not just send everyone in the audience an autographed photo of Bob Guza giving us all the finger? It would be much more cost effective.

Comments

[joanne February 22, 2008 at 05:18 PM]

AMEN! (I wish I could make that 80-million pt. font.)

[Michele February 22, 2008 at 06:13 PM]

Wow, I'm so glad the show was so boring today I stopped watching after 21 minutes. Freaking Diego?

I'm having a Gob Bluth moment: "COME ON!" I'm switching to Horrible People.

[Sarah February 22, 2008 at 06:31 PM]

Diego is also the one who really raped Laura at the Campus Disco. Just because he was a fetus when that happened doesn't mean he isn't the real guilty party, DUH.

Instead of watching this crapapalooza I could have had a V8 Fusion. It's heart healthy you know.

[Matthew February 22, 2008 at 06:35 PM]

I heart this Web site. Hard.

[Vicki February 22, 2008 at 07:11 PM]

I haven't seen the episode yet but I knew it was Diego because of SOD.

Really. Diego. How original. Was he eating Campbell's Healthy Request soup at the time?

[Paula February 22, 2008 at 07:48 PM]

What a stupid end to a dumb storyline....at least Diego is hot...serial killer or not....imagine they wanted the audience to play along as who dunnit????? That's the best they could do? In the words of Cam, "Bitch, please".

[Beth R. February 22, 2008 at 07:48 PM]

I too beleive the Anti-hot people bias....ohh that explains the pre-nom I just can't wrap my head around! IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW!

The only bright spot is Jason was so completley wrong on EVERYTHING in this storyline that it makes me giggle.

However when I heard the spoilers the words LAME, LAST MINUTE REWRITE, and LAZY ASS WRITING did escape my lips at top volume.

[Nicole February 22, 2008 at 08:58 PM]

I haven't watched passed Tuesday's episode on my DVR so I had no idea about this until I read your post. Here's my response:

YOU MEAN THOSE MOTHEREFFERS KILLED GEORGIE JONES, A LEGACY CHARACTER JUST TO HAVE AN EFFING DEAD SECONDARY CHARACTER MURDER HER?!

Holy Sh!t F*ck.

[Cara February 22, 2008 at 09:25 PM]

Uh, also, how are they going to explain away Diego's decision to murder Georgie, a girl he once had semi-intense love-like feelings for? and i really liked Diego too. Besides the hotness he was kinda interesting for a while there. I thought the Diego/Georgie pairing had been a nice break from the monotonous Georgie/Dillon pairing. And also, what did Emily do to Diego, ever? I can see why he'd want to kill Carly (because she's, well, Carly, and was also married to his father and kind of a bitch to him), and Georgie because she dumped him, and Sam because she killed- no wait "killed"- him, but why Emily?

Never fear, they can always explain it away with a Tumor Storyline. Maybe Diego can be another long lost Cassadine with the genetic tumor! Brilliant!

Not really. At all.

[Bourgeois Nerd February 22, 2008 at 09:52 PM]

At this point, I don't really care, because I just want this stupid storyline over, but Diego is just like... all that for THIS? Really? REALLY?!? Gawd...

I'm glad it wasn't really Coop, though, because having a sweet, upstanding, woman-respecting, hot cop/vet suddenly being a serial killer is just more than I could take.

[John February 22, 2008 at 11:20 PM]

Yeah. I heard about this lame excuse for a plot twist a while back, but refused to believe that GH would steal a plot from AMC. Seriously? Bringing someone back from the dead as a serial killer? Exactly the same thing as the Satin Slayer. Even with the crappy motive.

At least in this case, Diego wasn't cremated. Or was he? I wasn't watching GH closely when he was killed.

Whatever happened to having a murder mystery that made sense, was compelling, and didn't cause people's heads to explode across the United States and Canada? The last compelling serial killer story I remember watching and liking was the Loving murders. That may be an unpopular opinion, but it's mine and I'm sticking to it!

[Kazou February 23, 2008 at 12:42 AM]

@Vicki: Really. Diego. How original. Was he eating Campbell's Healthy Request soup at the time?

I laughed at this line but then thought about it. You know what's really sad? It proves Frons' intrusive product placements WORK because Vicki remembers each and every product promo'd. That's exposure commercials cannot buy. All of which means that the more we bitch about the specifi products mentioned, the more ABC will charge Campbell's, Revlon and cell phone makers -- and the more (and bigger) product placements they'll insert in the shows.

[Chad February 23, 2008 at 01:43 AM]

The reveal doesn't explain either why Georgie would have greeted the killer with a smile and a look of relief. You'd think her response to seeing a guy she thinks is dead would be rather less friendly.

Even though I don't watch AMC, I realized off the bat that someone had been "inspired" by the identity of the Satin Slayer. Geesh, you'd think the least they could do is rip off a well-remembered, soap serial killer storyline and have the killer end up being a lookalike imposter acting as part of a larger vengeance scheme masterminded by an old villain thought dead (that would have been a good reason to bring back A.J. Quartermaine or one of the many dead Cassadines!).

Seriously, the only twist that can salvage this whole storyline is if it turns out that Helena Cassadine is holding Georgie and Emily and the rest captive on an uncharted island called Selrahc Trop.

[Kirsten February 23, 2008 at 09:52 AM]

"But DIEGO?"
I had to read that line several times before it sunk in.
Really? OH MY GOD - what complete and utter crap!
I stopped watching GH when Georgie died (though that was only the last straw -things like Jax and the rape were part of it too). I love your site (well written snark is a thing of beauty and deserves fandom) and have been reading the GH stuff with a bit of a relief that I was not in front of the tv when the writers went off the rails( time and time again).

Diego?

Come on, the kid wasn't the world best actor but he didn't deserve the stalker plot or this. Did he sleep with someones wife?

I am sick at heart that this show is going out of it's way to erase the memory of its former greatness.

Wow.

[Kade February 23, 2008 at 10:45 AM]

"The reveal doesn't explain either why Georgie would have greeted the killer with a smile and a look of relief. You'd think her response to seeing a guy she thinks is dead would be rather less friendly." -- Chad

Same thing on AMC - just before Simone died, she looked up and casually said, "Oh, its you." Hardly what you'd say to your friend's presumed dead father who was CREMATED!

[ckn February 23, 2008 at 10:46 AM]

Word!

[mazz February 23, 2008 at 11:48 AM]

I, too, read the spoiler about it being Diego, but was hoping it wasnt true. Didnt think they would be so stupid...but silly me...of COURSE they would! The other possibility reported was Lorenzo, which would have been just as bad, but at least he is still ALIVE. When will the powers that be realize that Guza is not a good match for this show? His instincts suck and he is killing this once decent show.

[nattyp February 23, 2008 at 12:12 PM]

i know i was watching this show all week and i was like i m tired of the show revolving around lulu sonny jason and carly. i only watch these days for the hospital staff and robin's pregnancy which they have done no justice to , i thought it was the groundgreaking story guza the luza has wanted to write for years?

[Desertrose February 23, 2008 at 12:29 PM]

Having the killer be a Campbell's salesman gone postal because certain Port Chuckians were not drinking/eating their "red" products would make more freaking sense than this idiotic storyline.

Why the penchant for killing (and re-killing) of viable characters?

What this really comes down to is lazy and inept storytelling and too many fools at the top of the ABCD/GH food chain patting each other on the back.

Shame on you GH/Guza/Frons and ABCD.You should be ashamed when your fans can tell a better story that you so called paid professionals.

As for me, I no longer watch this mess after watching since it began in the 60's....but Serial Drama chicks...YOU TOTALLY ROCK!! Love your brilliant insight!

[Becca February 23, 2008 at 12:30 PM]

Just when I think this show can't get lamer or less creative, it goes back to making a special effort to suck more.

Chad, not only does Georgie's reaction -- whether it was to Coop or Diego -- make no sense whatsoever, the bigger question for me is why the hell Diego would want to kill Georgie? Or Maxie? Or Letitia? And why wouldn't Sam be his primary target, what with her having "killed" him and all?

I hate this show.

[CCC February 23, 2008 at 02:03 PM]

From Daytime Confidential, 2/08/08:

"Is Diego the TMK? RUMORS say he is and he is doing it to avenge his family. Is that why the TMK seems to be focusing on Alexis and her family? Remember, Alexis killed Luis, Diego's uncle. Sam was the one who shot and supposedly killed Diego. Carly, broke his dad's heart and Diego has always hated Maxie. We're guessing that Leticia was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Emily was to get at Jason for killing his father. The only one that is tough to explain is Georgie. Diego and Georgie were friends and Diego even had feelings for the youngest Jones girl, but Georgie did have a hand in Sage's death. If Georgie's death happened the way Cooper explained it to Logan, its completely plausible that Georgie ran from Coop, scratching him in the process and ran directly into Diego. Knowing that Georgie would do the right thing and out him to really be alive, Diego did the only thing he could and killed Georgie."

This seems like a semi-plausible explanation for Diego being the TMK. The only victims it seemed difficult to explain were Emily and Georgie, and I think DC's explanation could be right. They also mentioned something about Kristina's shut-down being that she saw him and thought he'd been dead. The pieces are kind of starting to fit..

[Nan February 23, 2008 at 02:21 PM]

I thought the Satin Slayer was the worst serial killer storyline ever and thought nothing and I mean nothing could top it. Congrads to Phelps and her idiocy for surpassing the crap that AMC threw on the screen(I read this was her brainstorm)and for Brian Frons continuing to allow the inept Phelps and Guza to destroy what was once the best soap on TV and to continue meddling into what he knows nothing about. The last Decent story on this soap was the metro court and I understand it was another creative talent who could not tolerate Fron's BS who thought that up, so he(Jack Smith) justifiably gave Frons the finger and left.

I guess Santa Barbara and Another World were not enough. Let's give Jill and Bob Guza control here and see how much worse they can make this .

At least AMC has the insight to try and salvage something of their show by bringing back Angie and Jessie, although the rest of AMC still sucks donkey balls.

The entire ABCD lineup is a mess and until Frons is gone there is no hope for what once was the best network for soaps.

Anne Sweeney fire his sorry ass and the rest of the incompetent morons at GH before cancellation hits and quit promoting products on your damn shows to try and balance the loss of revenue. Next we will see Jason Morgan holding up an AMEX card saying 'Don't leave home without it' before he blows someone away.

[Nan February 23, 2008 at 02:29 PM]

WOW. I love your insight but I have to think back many years to think what comes close to this in terms of moronic stories and wasted characters on a soap.

Why not turn GH into Dark Shadows and make everyone a vampire or zombie. For all the alleged realism at GH(and I say that laughing) and how they don't do what other shows do, this is the most insulting thing TPTB at GH and ABC have done, and that says a lot. They continue to insult the intelligence of the viewers with their lame excuse for a show. I have tuned back into DOOL myself and am glad I have because it has ROCKED lately.

GH's ratings suck and they actually deserve to be worse than they are. TMK, Tumors,HNR, - one ridiculous half assed story after another and these people still collect a paycheck. I an beginning to think Frons must be holding something over Anne Sweeney's head.

They kill off 2 wonderful characters and insult the viewers by not even doing their deaths justice.

[smirks February 23, 2008 at 04:46 PM]

Funny story...I was out at dinner last night with one of my friends who has passed the Frons "training" initiative and is somehow utterly brainwashed by the crap on GH, and she thought that Diego being the killer was utterly brilliant writing, and she said the only thing that would have made it any better is if they had made Lucky the killer and I swear I gave her a look so psychotic she had to move her chair back from the table. I believe my response was something like "Expletive expletive Georgie Jones expletive dead expletive Emily Quartermaine expletive expletive stupid expletive DEAD expletive no sense EXPLETIVE. EXPLETIVE!!!!"

[Carissa February 23, 2008 at 06:31 PM]

I'm not sure what people arent understanding. Natalia was leaving irregardless of the storyline. SHE CHOSE TO LEAVE THE SOAP.

[nattyp3 February 23, 2008 at 08:09 PM]

this show is horrible, they have so much talent but they choose to utilize the same 3 or 4 people. excellent column

[Carl February 23, 2008 at 08:12 PM]

"And also, what did Emily do to Diego, ever?"

That part of the story makes the MOST sense to me. Some people are too stupid to live. Hell, Tumily has proven she's too stupid to even unlive.

[February 23, 2008 at 08:31 PM]

Even if Natalia CHOSE to leave the soap, it doesn't mean that her character's death had to make no sense whatsoever. Heck, it didn't even mean her character had to die at all. And what about Lindze? Surely they didn't kill her off for storyline reasons.

The problem with GH is that it is no longer about telling a great story. It's about doing whatever the management wants to do and justifying it with a stupid story.

[Canada February 23, 2008 at 09:41 PM]

Still pissed that Emily & Georgie are dead. To top it off they were killed by a nobody. They bring on these pissy ass waste of space newbies (Nadine & Leyla to mention a few), but character's that actually meant something are being killed off left & right. Bite me GH!! My favorite is still on looking like a complete fool being Nikolas's blowup doll. Not interested!

[Carissa February 23, 2008 at 10:37 PM]

Sure, they could of taken her off in other ways than a "text message" killer but simply having her character "leave town" or other things really wouldnt of fit with the current storyline. She was as sure that she wanted to marry nikolas as I'm as sure my name is carissa so her getting cold feet wouldnt of worked.
Killing her off was probably the best way to handle the situation. I would of preferred a tragic car accident than a text message killer but it is what it is.

Besides leaving it open for natalia to come back wouldnt of been a wise option...more than likely Natalia wont be coming back to that soap, period and even if there was a small chance she might...who's to say Tyler will still be around...that was what I was trying to get at.

[Gin February 23, 2008 at 11:20 PM]

Why all the comments about Emily and Natalia. Who the *uck cares, I am pissed at the waste and idiocy of this storyline regardless of her tenure on this crapfestola. They could have recast, could have killed her and GEORGIE off differently of at least made the story and killer someone who did their deaths justice. This lame ass conclusion is an insult to the intelligence of the viewers of this sorry excuse for a show. And by the way, who gives a *uck about Nikolas or Tyler either. Has nothing to do with any of this.

I am so done with GH and ain't ever returning. They have insulted the intelligency of too many viewers and their lame ass ratings continue to say viewers ain't buying Frons, Phelps, and Guza's *hit anymore.

[Carissa February 23, 2008 at 11:24 PM]

Thats fine Gin...you are entitled to your opinion. So, if you're leaving..leave..end of story. Dont waste my time reading foul language posts.

[Nina February 23, 2008 at 11:31 PM]

I have no idea why people here are making this about Natalia and her tenure on this show. Emily and Nikolas are 2 independent characters on this show and if Frons and his band of idiots gave one shit about the history of this show, they would have realized these 2 characters can survive independently on this show and that as much as I respect Natalia, Emily should have been recast. But these morons have turned this into a cheap version of the Sopranos and I say cheap meaning sleazy and poorly written, and a show of couples. Families, characters with heart don't exist now that emily and georgie are gone. And WTF about Georgie. We get moronic Lulu who the fucking writers on this show have yet to determine who to pair her with. Is it Dillon, is it Milo, is it Spinelli, no how about Logan, Cooper, no let;s try Johnny. I hate this character with a passion and I never thought I would ever hate Laura Spencers daughter but I do.

Regardless the story is what it is. I am just totally insulted by Harpo, Zeppo, and Groucho, (Frons, JFP, and Guza) and their 'training' of the viewers. I hope this lame excuse for a show crashes and burns and Frons and his crew can watch re-runs of the Golden era of GH on TV land and kiss my ass.

[February 23, 2008 at 11:32 PM]

NL, love her or hate her as Emily, certainly wasn't so definitive of an Emily she couldn't have been recast, especially since she didn't originate the role. NL leaving was no justification for killing off Emily Quartermaine and Georgie Jones (for good measure) in the lamest, stupidest, most boring murder mystery of the decade, which was the big climax to the most lackluster sweeps I can ever recall.

I do find it hilarious that we stole the Satin Slayer from AMC, and did an even more pisspoor job with it than AMC did. And AMC stole our Feb 06 sweeps story, in which a health crisis brings a presumed dead hero out of hiding and into contact with the family he left behind, and have blown the doors off it, making the "return" of Robert Scorpio now look even shittier by comparison than it previously did.

I wonder if AMC will borrow the MC hostage crisis next sweeps, only because they won't have to center it around a chosen few mobsters, don't have to have a chosen, designated "hero" and occasionally are willing to allow villains to be villains, instead of handing them contracts and permanent Get Out Of Jail Free cards, blow the doors off the follow up of that story too, showing us what happens when someone actually uses sweeps as a turning point to set stories for the rest of the year, instead of taking a brilliant sweeps, and then promptly destroying anything good about it, and complete a hat trick.

[Liz February 23, 2008 at 11:39 PM]

Wow People. Calm down. I also hate the conclusion to this storyline and have no idea what Natalia has to do with the fact that this story was ill conceived, poorly written, and an insult to the intelligence of the viewers of this show. The problem here is much greater than Natalia leaving this show. Read the article. It is really how ABCD has destroyed 3, well 2 out of 3 quality soaps on their network.

GH was honestly the best soap on TV period for a long time, AMC was up there too. But specifically since Brian Frons has taken over ABCD, the quality of these shows has continued to diminish and viewers leaving. The loss of viewers in just this past year for GH is startling and has nothing to do with the soap genre dying. It has to do with ill conceived stories, poor writing, and too much meddling by a man who obviously has not one clue about how to write and produce a quality soap, nor do the people in charge.

I just hope someone new can come in and somehow restore ABCD to what it once was. the network with the best soaps on TV.

[Alyssa February 23, 2008 at 11:58 PM]

I think they wrong, killing Coop off he was a sweet guy, unless he not dead and they have a warehouse full of mummies, I quite remenber them saying their were two TMK, so who the other one, my money is on Dr. Devil he is the boss, he looks like angel, but he is behind all of this,DR. Devil.

[Cate February 24, 2008 at 12:36 AM]

I was so happy when I heard that Diego was the TMK cause it meant that I made the best decision ever by not watching GH anymore. I'm am so unbelievably done with this show it's dead to me...not soap opera dead either.

[Mel February 24, 2008 at 12:38 AM]

Well that was brilliant! You pretty much nailed it on the head! And there's nothing I like to watch better than a character I watched be born get murdered right before Christmas!!!! You know because watching them kill Emily who I pretty much grew up right along with really wasn't a great enough Thanksgiving gift - I totally needed this Christmas pick me up so thank you Bob Guza!!! Then to add fuel to the fire, let's make the deaths as meaningless as possible, re-write history, and have Diego Alcazar get resurrected like Jesus Christ and have him be the serial killer. Jill Farren Phelps is a frickin genius - not!!!

As someone else who's in this coveted 18-25 age group - I am so annoyed with this show I don't even know what to say!!!! I mean maybe if I thought for a minute that Guza might use Georgie or Emily's deaths for some real story telling and not just let them completely fall away and forget they existed like every other character he's killed off, I might, maybe, possibly be able to be slightly okay with this- but since he always just writes death for the initial shock and then forgets the character even existed it's beensuch a waste!!! The end of this horrid storyline proves it and with that, I am sure GH will lose more and more fans. Good riddance I say

The wonderful Claire Labine had a few pretty significant deaths in her day - but they were meaningful, drove some amazing story across the canvas and they still remain poignant. You just have to mention the names Stone and BJ and your heart breaks because you remember how well done their deaths were and how they touched everyone on the show and continue to have lasting effects. What did the deaths of Emily and Georgie do in the long run? Nothing but put another nail in the coffin of the Quartermaine and the Scorpio families! And we all knew these deaths were going to end up being about Sonny and Jason somehow too! God I hate this show right now and I think done with it once and for all. Good bye GH forever.

[Angie February 24, 2008 at 12:55 AM]

You know what. I was completely excited and delighted that Jill Farren Phelps, the brilliant exec producer at GH, made the decision to make Diego Alcazar, a character we all watched die on this show, the Text message killer. It reinforced a decision I made back in November to stop watching this show forever was the absolute correct decision and I feel validated in some respect. By the way anyone ever notice Emily never received a text message, but why worry about pesky little details like that.

i still found storylines intriguing up until 2004, but imo i've noticed a dramatic, dramatic, decline since then. if Guza, phelps and frons, in all their character-ruining, Jason worshipping, veteran-ignoring "glory" would AT THE LEAST, keep history in tact, i would respect them a little and I mean a very little bit.

but they are constantly rewriting history and recycling storylines that flopped the first time around. nothing on the show is working. i don't know any GH fan that is happy with the show.

nothing makes sense. even the couples,newbies sucking up airtime, when i think about it, make any sense at all because of what i remember from years ago. but there's the fabulous 3 ignoring character identities.

i have wished for my real GH to come back for a long time, but i honestly can't imagine it getting better and am glad I bid the show adieu when I did. I am not returning anytime soon and probably never.

[Beth February 24, 2008 at 01:51 AM]

Why all the comments about Natalia? Maybe she has fans that care. They have every right to comment about their favorite. Anyway I'm peeved at this dumb storyline. It makes no sense & just goes to show the writers get paid for nothing. I'm still trying to understand why the GH writers, of all people were even on strike. They've been on strike since 2003. I loved the characters Emily & Georgie instead of killing them off they could've sent them out of town somewhere. They did this as a sweeps stunt (that failed miserably) & it did nothing but piss people off even more than they already were.

[Valerie February 24, 2008 at 02:02 AM]

I have to say something. Do any of the actors on this show with clout with Phelps or Frons give a shit about the quality of their product. I mean when OLTL was bleeding, Erika Slezak and Robin Strasser, the stars of that show were very outspoken and got a new head writer. that show is not perfect but is improving. At AMC Susan Lucci spoke up and new writers also. The soap is still not great but heck new writers and Jessie and Angie are back.

Do SBu. MB or TG clearly the most powerful actors on this show not care or are they more worried about their own personal agendas. It is too bad GH does not have strong leading female leads on this show like Es, RS, and SL because it looks like a woman speaking out is the only chance of anyone at GH speaking out. The men there all seem to be satisfied with status quo.

[Sam February 24, 2008 at 02:33 AM]

This is typical Guza and his 'premature ejaculation' writing. He gets all excited about a story, props it promotes it, and then it dies a quick death before it is supposed to be over. This has happened with the TMK, with the idiotic random rage/tumor/hallucination storyline(the alleged most romantic story ever), the baby Jake story that has gone on painstakenly for almost 2 years now, the Jerry Jax/Emily treason stuff, Alexis and her supposed sudden cancer cure, need I go on.

The TMK is the worst so far because we have not seen the conclusion to some of the rest. I have no doubt that tumor/hallucination and baby Jake/liason will be as lame if not lamer. Fortunately I won't be watching to see how any of those conclude. The 1 hour a day I gain from this can be used to do something more valuable like picking my toenails.

[Sarah February 24, 2008 at 08:06 AM]

I HEART you Sam! Guza IS a premature ejaculatory writer/storyteller. Perfect description of his massive failings.

I wish you and your toe nails much happiness.

Valerie makes an important point. GH has no poweful female stars because they get so far less airtime, except for Carly and now again Sarah Brown. Guza is a massive mysogynist and hates women. He fired Anna Lee once when her contract ended, before she died! And all the women in PC are marginalized. They are all weak or victims or hellacious evil bitches.

And why would SBurton or MBernard complain? Guza fawns all over them like a crazy stalker. The whole show is built around them and their brooding and violence. They are in every scene almost every day, and MB loves to brood and be violent as does SB now. And their characters both get to sleep with every female on set pretty much. Guza idolizes and worships these two. Why rock the boat just to be on a better show?

And TG, he has complained before. But in the end he has a sweet deal. He gets like 6 months of vacation every year. He still makes a great salary as the only vet. He has a great life and GH supports it.

NLG KM KMcC LC and the rest of the women on this show have no power, Guza would never allow it.

[JoAnna February 24, 2008 at 11:45 AM]

This TMK story is just a long line of failed stories on this show. I can't wait for TPTB now to blame this on the writers strike. Well this show has been failing since the summer of sleeze in 2005 and has never completely recovered.

All of 2007 barring the Metro Court stuff which led to the unnecessary death of Alan Q and the ludicrous turning a villian into Jerry Jax crap because Guza had a hard on for him, has been horrible just horrible. I have no faith in a man and women(JFP is more of a victimizer of women that Guza - ie Frankie Frame anyone). She is a worthless shrew.

Frons is ultimately responsible. He and his cohorts need to vacate the premisis before they dig an even larger grave for the viewers. Hmm - is there a way for the TMK to continue working his magic?

[marion February 24, 2008 at 11:56 AM]

"Natalia was leaving irregardless of the storyline. SHE CHOSE TO LEAVE THE SOAP."

Yes, just like Amber Tamblyn, the ORIGINAL Emily, did years ago. Emily wasn't killed off then, even though her departure left a hole in the canvas. She was sent away and later brought back as Natalia. Finding a way to write Emily off for a time would have been easy - have Helena kidnap her, fake her death, and spirit her away somewhere.

Man, am I glad I stopped watching this show. Reading snark about it is much less painful.

[Mo February 24, 2008 at 02:16 PM]

I have to say I have never been a big fan of Natalia Livingstons or Lindzee Lethermans although I think both are very UNDERRATED actresses BUT. Emily Quartermaine and Georgie Jones were 2 legacy characters on this show and fans of this show deserved better than this ridiculous twist. This is worse than the Satin Slayer on AMC where Dixie was killed by a banana pancake, because AMC killed off 1 legacy character not 2 and as bad as AMC is, they fired the writers resonsible for that trash and brought in new ones. What does ABCD do? They reward Guza and Phelps for being complete morons and incompetents. I am hoping fans tune out in droves next week for the BIG TMK STORY and let these idiots know just how lame their asses are.

Frons, Guza, and Phelps all deserve to be sitting at home collecting unemployment for what they have collectively done to this show.

[bubbly1285 February 24, 2008 at 05:51 PM]

I couldn't agree more Mo! I couldn't agree more! Lucky for us, we have an infinite amount of reasons not to tune in. Diego Alcazar. Why not just make it the Pillsbury Dough Boy for as much sense as this stupid storyline made?

[Celine February 24, 2008 at 07:04 PM]

This really has nothing to do with anything, but I was just playing a word game and discovered the word "frons" means "the upper anterior portion of the head of an insect, above or behind the clypeus."

[Helen February 24, 2008 at 09:58 PM]

Celine,

Love your definition of Frons. Interesting enough the definition you outlined for Frons applies to the person most people are referring to here. He is "the upper anterior portion of the head of an insect, above or behind the clypeus."

[Michelle February 24, 2008 at 10:08 PM]

^ LOL Celine!

ok, Diego? seriously? wow. just...no. words. guess i'm not missing much by not watching!

[Celine February 25, 2008 at 02:39 AM]

Yep, really. :)

[Dede February 25, 2008 at 09:26 AM]

The only way for this show to get better is to get rid of Frons, Guza, an Phelps, and started over fresh the person that posted about SB.MB, TG have a sweet deal why change I agree, stong women wouldn't help Phleps dosen't like stong women or ones the fans love example Genie Francis why isn't she back
no they have turned Luck into a boring, drunk, who lives of Tracy who once was a stong charater and forced that relationship on us they kill off vets, trash there own history love in the afternoon is now a throw down on a desk please I am all for watching the old G.H. on Soap net this one just bites.

[Timepass February 25, 2008 at 09:54 AM]

This column is exactly why I love Serial Drama so much!

I was looking all over the Internet for people to address that stupid story and the stupid moronic decision they made about it! Guza even had the lack of integrity to say that the viewer could guess who the killer was! Really, did I say stupid before!

Diego wants to avenge, again, his family! And we lost two great young characters for that one! Why is the word stupid coming to mind again!

For TIIC to keep this horrendous Head writer, who cost them 1 million viewers, in the last year only show hoe little they care about soap! Seriously!

I completely agree with Celine, the only way for this show to get better, is to get rid of Frons, Guza, an Phelps!

[Marianne February 25, 2008 at 10:52 AM]

I want someone to beat Guza to death w/a bottle of V8Fusion, then I want Nancy Grahn to break a jar of Prego and cut Phelps w/the shards, then I want Kimberly McCullough to take one of the family-size cans of Healthy Request soup and shove it so far up Frons' ass......

Lame-ass, motherfucking, disjointed, ridiculous SHIT! And furthermore, damnit, the one thing on the show that could still be salvaged-the relationship of Robin and Patrick, and Patrick as a character instead of a one-note manwhore that we trot out to prop the "hotness" of various useless female characters (and, btw, Sarah? WHY did you come back for THIS?! Did you develop a huffing problem while you were gone?!)-they IGNORE to write BULLSHIT LIKE THIS! SONS-OF-BITCHES!

LOL, NOOOOO, I'm not bitter....

[kevin February 25, 2008 at 02:33 PM]

Thank you for reacting with as much disgust and horror as I did upon learning the dead Diego had just killed two of GH's strongest female characters. I am done. People wonder why soaps are dying and GH is exactly the reason why. How unbelievably lazy and insulting this reveal was. If you're going to make a dead character a killer, at least let it be Alan so one more Quartermaine can get some screen time!!!!

[Brett February 25, 2008 at 03:59 PM]

Look on the bright side. Given the unlikely identity of the TMK, at least this time they can't fault Mac and the PCPD for ineptitude in not solving the case, right?

[Nina February 25, 2008 at 04:28 PM]

Brett I beg to differ. Of course they can blame the PCPD. Were't they the ones to collect the body and declare him dead in the first place. Well maybe Port Charles needs a new coroner also. Maybe it was Monica who did the final death call on one of her drunken binges.

[Connie February 25, 2008 at 04:31 PM]

Well I deliberately am not DVR'ing another soap(DOOL) and started watching it just so GH won't get my DVR rating points. I won't be returning to GH period. Frons and his band of thieves can go steal someone elses time. Mine is more valuable than watching the same pathetic show and characters day in and day out. What a waste of decent acting talent this show is, and I am not talking about the newbies because they all SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good riddence GH. I can't wait for the cancellation notices to come out.

[lynne February 25, 2008 at 07:15 PM]

You go sista! This chicken sh*t way out with Diego is SOOOO lame! It's worse than reading a 400 page mystery novel looking for clues, and the killer is someone they introduce in the last few pages! Jeez, I didn't even watch when Diego was on -- so this has no meaning for me. Can't these idiots find another way to get rid of characters like sending them to Paris or something. WHY do they have to kill everyone, and then have them come back from the dead years later? Yeah, that happens IRL all the time.

Could some nice person tell me what "word" means and how it came about??

Thanks!

[Dia February 25, 2008 at 11:24 PM]

I really feel like the only way I could hate this storyline more is if the TMK was actually not Diego Alcazar but instead Diego of Go, Diego, Go fame.

That is the funniest sentence I have read in some time. Thank you.

[Sally February 26, 2008 at 12:29 PM]

Serial Drama chicks you ROCK. And I mean ROCK. By the way, the are going to fully re-enact the death of Emily Quartermaine on screen so that we can all see in complete detail, how Diego strangled and killed Emily. I hope Serial Drama writes about this total disregard of viewers and sickness that obviously is resident in the 3 biggest psychotics ever to ruin a soap opera, Frons, Phelps, and Guza.

[Kirsten February 26, 2008 at 12:45 PM]

Ok, I missed something...
What is this about "training" the audience?

[Bri February 26, 2008 at 12:56 PM]

Kristen - you mean you have never heard the brilliant Brian Frons(moron) talk about training the viewers to what he thinks they should like and that this is how to attrack and keep viewers engaged in a soap. Yes he did say this believe it or not. Does he think GH is a damn "cult". Maybe he does. He also made the dumbass comment about soap viewers wanting to watch their soaps on a cell phone. The amount of ludicrous statements this man makes continues to make me scratch my head over why he, Phelps, and Guza are continues to be allowed to exercise their reign of terror and destruction over what used to be the best network for soaps and the best soap. GH has no redeeming factor period and deserves every drop in the ratings they get.

[Colleen February 26, 2008 at 01:00 PM]

"Why should Georgie or Emily be killed off? We can only surmise that Bob Guza is a creatively bankrupt hack who is bloodthirsty for the chance to ruin General Hospital in a systematic fashion by decimating all of the core families who have made the show popular for decades, as they remind longtime viewers of eras gone by when the show wasn't a wretched pit with an uncomfortable focus on the mafia, murderers and misogyny." But to make Diego the killer puts the nail on the coffin. Oh no wait, reenacting Emily's murder in excruciating detail is the worst.

Remove the tumor, kill the TMK and let both stories die their justifiable deaths. Both stories stink and the beautiful Natalia Livingston has been turned into a gorgeous statue for this sad excuse for a show and storyline.

Umm, yeah, that about says it.

[Kristin February 26, 2008 at 03:35 PM]

I wasn't around for the original Diego storyline (I would have been 100,000 kinds of confused if I hadn't already read all the spoilers and figured out who he was beforehand - they never take new [or recently returned] viewers into account for these back-from-the-dead storylines. On the other hand, it doesn't appear they took ANYthing into account for this storyline, but I digress), so I've never seen that scene with Ted King. All I can say about that is: Yikes!

[Beth February 27, 2008 at 08:36 AM]

Seriously, did we kick Frons's and Guza's puppies? Did they do some sort of research and conclude that GH viewers have the intellect of amoeba?? And lastly, is possible to be TOO insulted by this show? Diego served no purpose when he was on the show the first time, so naturally GH brings him back to be the killer of two important legacy characters that would have driven stories for years to come.

GAH, this show. THIS SHOW...

If there is a Soap God, She is already putting together the tar and feathers for Guza, Frons, and Phelps for crimes against humanity.

[Vivian February 27, 2008 at 10:53 AM]

Can I say I have never really been a Natalia Livingston or Emily fan but I feel sorrier for her than I do Lindzee Letherman. She is stuck for another 2 months on this lame excuse for a show doing something I am sure she was not aware of. Now to add fuel to the fire GH is going to reshow emily's murder because of course killing off Georgie, tabling this story for 2 months, and making Diego the killer was not insultng enough.

Blow up dolls could do a better job of writing and producing than this sorry lot. Phelps and Guza and both cancers and have destroyed this once great great show to a pathetic hour of nothing.

I read the on-liner comments on the message boards and even a majority of those fans think the show sucks, although they don't represent the collective viewing audience. Suck Suck Suck - I use those words to collectively describe Frons, Phelps, and Guza.

[Beth February 27, 2008 at 02:27 PM]

Vivian, I agree. They treated Lindze Leatherman terribly, but at least she got a clean break and is now free to find something that will showcase her talents. I can't believe for one minute that Natalia was aware that her remaining days on this suckfest would be spent like this. And to top it off for fans of the actress, character, and coupling of Nikolas and Emily, the show's so blatant in pimping Nadine as his next girlfirend they're practically putting a neon arrow on her head. Or her wrist ducky is sending out sublmininal signals or something.

Wow, this show is slime.

[kelsey March 02, 2008 at 06:50 PM]

When I read your GH writer thought process regarding the TMK not being a vet, it didn't even click in my head at first that you meant WAR VET. I was thinking that this was more hilarious commentary on GH's treatment of the veteran actors of the show. I truly thought that you were having the writers refer to Logan and Coop as veteran actors, which I thought was pretty funny.

[Jess March 02, 2008 at 11:36 PM]

I'd have rather it have been Helena. I mean, if you're going to go cop out -- go Cassadine, they're so deliciously insane that you would probably actually be able to sell it with little effort. "Little effort"! That's right up your alley, Guza.

[katiya March 03, 2008 at 05:23 AM]

Preach it! to all these posts. I can almost understand all the swearing. Basically I loved Craig/Moreau/Jerry but lack of screentime and forgetting my place in the story when I did see him and also finally he getting shot or stabbed in every scene...Yeah writers you did it. You turned me into a J-Lex hater. Its what you wanted. Now I am just PO'd to death. Heck even SR must be wondering what mess did he trap himself into. Heck, I wouldn't reup for another 2 yrs fella even if GH lasts that long. I can absolutely see why ABC soaps minus the improvement over at OLTL are bleeding. I'm ready to let it die a merciful death and be happy with my memories of Robert, Anna, Stone, Lucy, Alan, Lila...When the show actually was worth watching...Memories, stuck between the pages of my mind...See I'm going mad...