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« Days of Our Lives Couple of Weeks in Review. Sort Of. Not Really. I'm Too Bored, Y'all! | Main | Washed Up Stars A Go Go »

March 17, 2008

General Hospital Week in Review

This show is still boring me.  But I've come to the realization that despite that, the blog must go on.  Plus Maxie had a super cute outfit this week that I had to preserve in screencap form.  So the official Week in Review returns.


The truly moving story of Will the Hitman Recover the Use of His Hands in Time to Kill Again and Sleep With the Woman Who He Isn't Supposed To Be Sleeping With Because As His Babymama She and His Kid Are In Danger From the Job He Is So Desperate to Get Back? continues. 

Ugh.  At least the visual of the oven mitts of gauze is entertaining.


I call this:  I CAN HAZ GUN?

(I also loved Sonny's pissy little rant about how dare Jason get injured, and maybe "this is just an excuse" not to do his Really Important job.  Yes, that gauze does look psychosomatic to me.  Although I would welcome the twist that Jason is faking all this because it's the only way he can break up with Sonny.)


Mike's amazement at Marianna's mad waitressing skillz was...entertaining.


Mike: I don't know who you are, but that was amazing.  And you did it all with a smile!

Yeah man, when she picked up those two plates, at two separate times, and then poured coffee?  IT WAS UNBELIEVABLE.  How DOES she do it?  One day I hope to be able to transfer liquid from one container to another without scowling.  I dream big!

Listen, I know waitressing is hard work.  But waitressing for 30 seconds....isn't, really.  But this was such an obvious attempt to prop a character that is otherwise as appealing as a brow wax, I just laughed.  Tune in tomorrow, when Marianna will be wearing an "I Heart Puppies" t-shirt and extolling the virtues of rainbows! 

If this show thinks it's going to make me sorry for saying, as I am about to, that I would rather watch an hour a day of that fake ventilator "breathing" for comatose Logan than Marianna do anything, especially Ric, well then 1) it will be first evidence I have seen in a long time that anyone there thinks about anything, really, and 2) NO.


Michael and his disturbing understanding of his father's business is finally apparently as obvious to the writers as it has been to viewers for the last several years.


Michael: When people don't do what my dad says, they die.
Crazy Cabin Lady: He gives them the evil eye?  ::giggles::
Michael: No.  He has a guy who shoots them.  That's his job.  I'm not making it up.

If there are no further consequences to all of this stuff with Michael beyond him getting stuck in a cabin with an old lady for a few days, I will be disappointed.  But unsurprised. 

If they would just age Michael by five or so years, I think they could do some really interesting stories following up on this whole idea that he has been so damaged by Sonny's "job."  But as it is now this young kid has already shot someone, as part of this heavy-handed "guns are bad, mmkay, but only in the hands of kids" story.  And he isn't even in high school yet, and I was creeped out by him long before he started experimenting with death threats and firearms.  So what am I supposed to get out of this storyline, again?  No wonder the writers lose track.  I did in less than three sentences.  I guess I can sum up by saying I don't really like this character so I don't care what happens to him


Hey, speaking of characters I don't really like so therefore I don't care what happens to them . . . This week we learned that Dr. Devlin is the criminal that Jerry/James/Moreau has been dealing with for months.  I can't remember if we know what specific crimes he's committed, but the "good" side of him in the form of Dr. Devlin has been around for about ten minutes and is pretty much a douche, so I'm not sure the writers achieved the Dr. Jeckell/Mr. Hyde thing they were going for.  More like Mr. Hyde/Mr. Hyde-ish. 

Dr. Devlin does appear to have about 17 specialties, though, which is at least three or four more than most doctors at GH, so there's that.


I feel like Johnny has been in the same outfit, writing music on the walls of a tiny room for weeks.


Do you know why?  Because Johnny has been in the same outfit, writing music on the walls of a tiny room for weeks.  This show is truly all about the drama.


Ric and Claudia's first scene together made me think:


1) These two have the potential to be a smoking hot couple.  Two actors who have mad chemistry with virtually everyone they're paired with, and characters with an intertwined history that doesn't involve them ever having dated.  Intriguing.

2) Rick Hearst needs a haircut.

3) Marianna sucks.  (She wasn't in the scene, sure, but . . . she sucks that much.)

Oh, and I am still waiting for Sarah Brown to email me her fitness routine.


Damn, girl!  Claudia should just insist the next mob war be decided based on arm wrestling.  She will get those shipping lanes back stat.


I know it's meaningful to Kate because of what it represents from childhood, and that it's supposed to be some symbol of how enduring her and Sonny's relationship is,


but every time I see that fucking hideous hat I just bust out laughing.  And you know Kate Howard would too, if she weren't so inexplicably mesmerized by the wondrous (and wandering) Corinthos wang.


You know what would have made the final goodbye between Nikolas and Emily really touching?


If she hadn't died SIX MONTHS AGO.


My love of DrunkSam is well-documented.  Well, FlirtySam isn't nearly as enjoyable (how could she be?), but I so enjoy it when Kelly Monaco gets an opportunity to be expressive over something other than one of Sam's loved ones dying or Jason betraying her.  Now granted, she was flirting with the now confirmed to be evil Dr. Devlin, but whatever.  Fun screencaps!





This week, Robin and Patrick argued about the baby, about Robin's stubbornness, and Patrick's reluctance to be a father.



It was groundbreaking.

I still love their scenes because the actors are so good together and the storyline has such potential, but that's only going to carry me through the same repetitive arguments for so long.  And then Jason Thompson's hotness will only get me through another year or so, max.

Sam, what do you think of this ongoing Robin and Patrick argument?


I know, I'm so over it too.


The genius GH casting department chalks up another victory, once again with a father/son pairing.  Meet the new and older Spencer. 


They even have the same forehead!  Truly, that little boy looks like he could be Tyler Christopher's and Alicia Leigh Willis' kid.

It is a little weird that now Spencer is older than Cameron and is creeping up on Morgan.  But 1) it's a soap, these things happen, and 2) I am totally fine with Spencer in particular aging rapidly, because the older he gets, the longer Courtney has been dead.


I love, love, love this outfit. 


I can't find a better shot of the dress, but it is 100% adorable.  Should you be wondering what to get me for St. Patrick's Day, this is it.

Oh, on substance.  I had a brief moment when I was like hey there Spinelli, how you doin'?


But then they cut to a close up of that hair


and I wanted Maxie to shield my eyes, too.


Hee.  I so enjoy it when she is perplexed/repelled by him.  Although he did look better in the more normal clothes she gave him, and the two of them sleuthing together continues to be good soapy fun, I still will pitch a fit if the show puts these two together romantically.

I know my dislike of this potential pairing isn't shared by a lot of our readers.  It's not that I don't like the actors.  I do.  And I like the characters as friends, and maybe as partners in a PI business.  But I don't see them as a believable couple.  Mostly because I don't think they've made Spinelli a believable guy yet.  He's still a cartoon.  Bradford Anderson isn't the prototypical soap hunk, which I think is a good thing.  (I am a sucker for a hot dork -- a current example being Nick on Days.)  So they don't need to make Spinelli talk like a mad-lib and have hair like Peter Brady in a windtunnel for me to believe he's a dork.  I could get that, from the computer obsession and the social awkwardness and so forth.  The caricature they have decided to go with is just lazy writing, in my opinion.  If it's meant to be campy and funny, fine.  But then he doesn't get to have a romance with the town's most awesome bad girl.   


I am really enjoying the ongoing battle between Tracy and Monica.


Especially because if Tracy wins, we might actually get some scenes in the near future in the Quartermaine mansion.  Yes, they're going to have to start inventing new Quartermaines to fill up all the rooms since the writers have been killing off that family for sport, but a few scenes in the Q abode are better than nothing.



Oh, yeah.  On Friday about half the town was on a pier when it went boom.  I'm sure this will be something hugely dramatic that is riveting and trailblazing and changes everything.  Don't you think, Sam?


I concur.

Screencaps courtesy of Clarissa.


are you guys ever going to do a recap of the Robin Unwrapped marathon? I'd love to read your thoughts on the mid-90s eppy in particular.

Yep, I'm doing recaps of each of the three episodes. They're just taking awhile. Because the show back then was so complex and amazing and it's difficult to contain all that in a recap. Or because I'm lazy.

Loved the screencaps...and I am a huge SpinMax fan who absolutely agrees that they need to take Spinelli further into the direction of Real Boyness. That being said, I still love them together and hope the show takes them *slowly*.

I CAN HAZ GUN actually made me snarf soda onto my nifty macbook. So, uh...thanks?

I got a couple of more:

ABC Daytime's new slogan: "Hell Bent For Cancellation".

And I think it would make GH livelier if they played the Sith intro music from the Star Wars movies every time Carly and Lulu walk into a scene. Wouldn't it just be awesome? Goodness knows they evil incarnate. Just imagine hearing that "duh nuh nuh..duh duh duh duh nuh nuh nuh"...it could warn off the others around them from their evil mind control powers.

It certainly couldn't hurt.

Re: Johnnies clothes...I don't think Sonny's men gave him the option of bringing an overnight bag and a change of clothes when they grabbed him!...Unfortunately, the violence that permiates this show just keeps going on and on. Yet ANOTHER explosion, people missing, searching through the wreckage....sound familiar? HOW MANY TIMES ARE THEY GOING TO REDO THIS SCENARIO???? Uggggghhhhhh!

Becca, I, too, had high hopes for the Michael-disappearance storyline. When I first heard that he was going to hide out on a cargo ship, my imagination immediately seized upon the idea of him carried off to places unknown on a long, long voyage, where he would be SORAS'd approximately seven years and come back a buff, hot, 18-year-old merchant marine with a marked resemblance to his father, A.J. (either Sean Kanan or Bill Warlock would be fine with me). No offense intended to Dylan Cash, but I've never found him particularly attractive as a child and I believe he's in the early throes of a creepy adolescence. The idea of witnessing same is not a prospect that I, as an audience member, relish.

To be honest, I've always thought that casting this kid is a blemish on that department's otherwise near-flawless record of success. Never could really believe that a looker like A.J. (either Kanan or Warlock) and a fairly attractive Carly (S. Brown)could've ended up spawning him.

"And I think it would make GH livelier if they played the Sith intro music from the Star Wars movies every time Carly and Lulu walk into a scene."

HA! This made me laugh and laugh and laugh.

I love Screencap Sam. She's elevated many a blog post from Awesome to Super Awesome.

Charlie, that Star Wars evil Sith background music idea for Carly and Lulu is pure genius.

In that vein what should be Sonny or Claudia's background tracks?

For Claudia maybe "She's a Brick House.....She's Lettin' it All Hang Out"?

And for Sonny maybe some more sad rap gangsta wannabe stuff like they played for the teen scoundrels who sold Michael the gun and bullets? That music was both ignorant and pathetic, just like Sonny!

I hope other bloggers make more suggestions.

Like for Jax maybe the sound of crickets chirping whenever he appears to be thinking! That would have enhanced not only his wedding to Carly but his general brain and ball loss since hooking up with her.

Love that they had to wisk Jason away to Seattle when they are a simple helicopter ride away from Manhattan. Comeon, no one in NY can fix his hands?

Personally I always found it odd they cast a child that resembles the pre-surgery Jackie Zeman to play Michael....since Carly admits she's a Spencer about...oh never.

I nominate the Theme from Psycho whenever Michael shows up.

And let's not forget "Hallelujah" for Jason since the "writers" (I use the term loosely) seem to think he's nothing but holy...while I think he's the word after holy (you know that naughty four letter that you shouldn't say that starts with S...yeah, you know what I mean).

I'm daring anyone from YouTube to do this.

If people have the clips they are willing to send me...I'll totally volunteer for it....PM me in the forums people. PM me in the forums.

I Can Haz Gun?

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