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« 2009 Is Off To a Great Start For One Port Charles Resident | Main | Our Latest Soap Opera Digest Column »

January 06, 2009

Double The Pleasure, Double The Fun

Greenlee: I'm sorry...for all the crazy talk. Opal just pushed some buttons, that's all. I don't think our wedding is doomed. It's going to be perfect, just like the rest of our lives.

Yes, Greens, you're totally right. Your wedding is going to be perfect, what with the date being picked on a whim, the complicated issue of the divorces you and your fiance have to go through and the fact that you are sharing it with Bianca and some woman that you don't know at all. What could possibly go wrong?!

The AMC writers don't even need to exert any sort of effort in writing a terrible story for these four but, bless their hearts, they just are not content to sit and rest on their laurels. They really want to try! It's admirable, if you ignore the part about them trying to be a new brand of awful.

Bianca: What? You guys -- you guys are getting married on Valentine's day?

Ryan: Yes, we are. We just chose it. A very scientific method, actually. Why?

Reese: That's actually when we were going to tie the knot.

Greenlee: Oh, then we'll have to choose a different date then.

Ryan: Ah, yeah, well, no.

1.) OF COURSE these morons are getting married on Valentine's Day. OF COURSE.

2.) OF COURSE Ryan is the biggest Bridezilla of them all. OF COURSE.

Ryan: That would be kind of like tempting, you know, fate. The gods might get angry with that. You know what I mean?

I do know what you mean, Ry. The gods totally frown upon randomly chosen dates being changed, but they are totally cool with a wedding being planned while both participants are still in the process of divorcing their current spouses. 

Greenlee: Yeah, but we would want to invite the same people that Bianca and Reese would be inviting, so --

Ryan: Yes, that's true. That is true, but we could just kind of alter the time a little bit. You guys could take the evening. We could take the afternoon.

Bianca: You know what? Why -- why don't we just do a double wedding? That'd be fun.

It totally will be! For the audience! Who will no doubt turn to massive quantities of hard liquor in order to make it through two complete farces. Eeeeee!!

Reese, perhaps because of her supersonic greatness, is completely fine with sharing her wedding with two strangers.

Bianca: Are you sure you're ok with this whole double wedding thing?

Reese: Yeah, it'll be great.

"I love the idea of sharing the most special day of my life with two people I don't know who aren't even divorced from their current partners yet. It's going to be rad! Why don't we go all out and have a triple wedding with people we meet online?!"

Erica, Erica Kane is the sole voice of reason in this entire situation and pointed out to Bianca that this is a sucky idea on all fronts AND nobody wants to jinx their nuptials by teaming up with the Ryan/Greenlee train-wreck, but Bianca completely ignored her. Bianca, you fool! Listen to your mother! She's the smartest person in Pine Valley, no matter how many brain cells she kills with her liberal usage of hairspray!

Comments

Total LMFAO at this:
"She's the smartest person in Pine Valley, no matter how many brain cells she kills with her liberal usage of hairspray!"

Of all things to listen to Erica on...signs you're jinxing your marriage should be number one with a freaking bullet!

BIANCA: "That'd be fun."

she's so casual...like they're discussing Couples Bowling Night.

i bet Pratt thinks he's so clever...this way, they can pretend they are having a "ground-breaking" gay wedding, but then it will be interrupted by GREENLEE's death, so they wont have to actually go through with it.

Seriously, the the eff are these fools thinking? In what world is a double-wedding cool? I know Bianca is supposed to be the nicest person on the planet (in order to ease queasy viewers into accepting her as a lesbian), but she's still Erica Kane's daughter. Erica Kane's kids do NOT share weddings. This show sucks beyond all belief.

Also, RyRy, if your bride-to-be says she has a bad feeling about getting married, perhaps maybe you might not want to rush her to the alter.

I know, I'm talking to characters instead of the IIC, but maybe the IIC are out there reading these posts and will realize that there are those of us who once LOVED this show before it got shot to hell. So sad.

that's not what any of them were saying as I muted the scenes and made up my own dialog.

I prefer my way. It's far less insulting to one's intelligence.

Although I should note that Erica was very wise in my version too. Interesting.

Nothing like sharing your wedding day with the woman who made your life hell and used to call you "Lesbianca." !!

It simply disgusts me that Greenlee and Ryan are traipsing around PV celebrating! WTF? Wife driven mad in a mental hospital, husband that saved her life treated as a non entity and poor little girl missing her mommy. I know - let's PARTY! WTFing F?

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