Don't Leave Me Hanging, Show!
It is exceedingly rare that anything on General Hospital intrigues me enough to look forward to the next scene in order to see the fallout, but that happened twice today, and both times, the followup consisted of, "Remember when that thing happened and it bordered on interesting? We don't" and the writers blithely moved along to the amalgamation of boredom that is the rest of the show.
I'd ask what gives, but we all know that the answer is a combination of "awful writing" and "editors less skilled than a gaggle of geese".
But really, though, I beg for follow-up!
Like, Elizabeth has a daydream/nightmare about being caught making out with Nikolas by a very shrill imaginary Robin, and then notices Sam, juggling two coffees and whistling nonchalantly
which leads Liz to unburden her soul to Sam and say:
Elizabeth: Sam...when I was with Jason, I judged you an awful lot. And I look back now, and I see what a hypocrite I was. I had no right to cast judgment on anyone. Lord knows I'm not proud of anything that i've done. So I owe you an apology. You don't have to accept it. I'm not sure I would.
That's kind of in the same neighborhood as intriguing, right? But there was zero follow-up, except that Sam was able to read between those few lines and correctly ascertain that Liz is conflicted about her relationship with Lucky, which leads to the second of the episode's missed opportunities when Sam explains the situation to Jason
Sam: Uh...Lucky is a good person. And I do know that he loves Elizabeth and the boys a lot. I just...Jason, I don't think that she feels the same way about being engaged to him as he does.
Why is this intriguing? Not because of the tortured grammar (Lucky and Liz have differing feelings on being engaged to Lucky?), but because of Jason's amazingly melodramatic reaction shot.
The man is a step away from having the vapors and damn it, I want to see Jason Morgan get the vapors! But no. Sam hit him with that tantalizing knowledge and then...nothing.
Which is the perfect word to describe the rest of the episode!
When it comes to romantic chemistry, Nikolas and Liz have...nothing.
I know it was in her daydream and perhaps she was trying to convince herself that she shouldn't have anything to do with Nikolas, but the look on Liz's face before he kissed her was one of complete revulsion
I've long held the opinion that Becky Herbst could make chemistry with a plotted plant, but, really, she spent the entire scene looking like she was restraining herself from vomiting all over his suit.
When it comes to having faith that the writers will continue to write amazing scenes for Elizabeth and Lucky, I have...nothing.
When I watch Liz and Lucky scenes, I am torn between wanting to get caught up in the squee, if you will, and wanting to avert my eyes because I know it is only a matter of time before the show sets it on fire, so why bother getting attached to something that will flame out in a wholly tragic manner?
When Rebecca learned the truth about Nikolas's, um, brilliant plan to get revenge on her, I felt...nothing.
Rebecca: Are you deliberately trying to hurt me?
Nikolas: I--I was, but now i'm trying to stop. I mean, this isn't fair to either one of us. I--I can't pretend anymore.
Rebecca: What exactly are you pretending?
Nikolas: Ok. When I found out that you were lying to me, I vowed to pay you back by making you fall in love with me and--and then dropping you. But w-wait. Then I realized that you had a good heart and that you didn't deserve it.
Rebecca: Oh. So, why didn't you tell me?
Nikolas: Because I really didn't want to hurt you, Rebecca. Honestly, I didn't. So, I enlisted Ethan, offered him money. But to his credit, he didn't take it. And then I... I just decided to... Keep you for myself.
I know, it's totally shocking that a story with two characters who have zero likability, played by two actors who phone in their scenes more often than not didn't lead to an emotional response.
Well, I did actually feel something: disappointment that Rebecca didn't listen to Nikolas outline his amazingly moronic scheme and say, "You know what, I am a shady grifter, and I know from schemes, and if that's the best you can do with your fancy Cassadineness, the world is going to hell". Dumbest "revenge" "plot" of all tine!
If someone can explain the point of this story to me (am I supposed to be impressed that Nikolas is doing the "noble" thing and not following through on his plan? Am I supposed to be pleased that the con got conned?)--nay, if someone can explain the point of Rebecca at all, I'd appreciate it muchly.
When it comes to writing for Patrick and Robin, the show has...nothing.
Did you know that Patrick was a major horndog back in the day? And that Robin is completely insecure? Because he was and she is, respectively, and now, ohmigod! Ex-girlfriend is in town and things are going to get awkward!
Patrick: Really? So, no jello shooter shot stories or anything?
Lisa: Maybe later, when I know Robin better. Man...You were wild back in the day.
Patrick: Me? I was just trying to keep up with you.
Lisa: Well--well.... It was a long time ago.
Patrick: It was. Sometimes, it doesn't seem like it was that long ago.
Awkward! For me, most of all.
How creatively bankrupt do you have to be if the only story you can come up with for two young, adorable doctors is "Third party comes to town and creates tension"? Granted, when they do think outside of the box in terns of Patrick and Robin, we get things like the PPD story, so maybe I should just shut up...
I am reserving judgment on Lisa Niles, said third party, until she has a few more scenes.
Maybe I am wrong and she will be fantastic, and this storyline will be awesome, and Jason will stay out of the mob forever, and Sonny will go to jail and Alexis will get a love interest and I will find a large bag full of money on the street and get free gingerbread lattes for life...
When it comes to fashion sense, Olivia's got...nothing.
I'm not sure how a garment can be both slutty and school-marmish at the same time, or why such a thing exists and was purchased and put on camera for a national audience (albeit a small one), but here we are.