My eyes have (barely) recovered from the plaid coat assault and my hearing is back intact after temporarily striking due to the words spoken during today's General Hospital. Do you know what it says about a show when a primary complaint is that the show causes the senses to stop functioning?! Well, mostly it means that the person doing the complaining is melodramatic and prone to hyperbole, but also that this show is home to more confusing, offensive and poorly written things than one single hour of television has any right to be.
In the interest of fairness, I should admit off the bat that there was a moment today that made me giddy. And no, it wasn't the back-to-boring Rebecca making plans to bid Port Charles farewell; it was even better. It was small, but it brought me such joy.
Elizabeth: Last year, Cameron spent three hours running around this place trying to pick a tree. This year, you and I will pick two or three, and he can make the final selection.
Lucky: Yeah. The best-laid plans.
Elizabeth: Oh, geez. Don't let him see this one.
Lucky: Why not?
Elizabeth: Well, because it's all bare on this side. Don't you remember the tree he picked last year because he felt sorry for it?
Is that not the greatest thing in the universe? Everything about Cameron Webber is delightful, from his adorability on-screen to the fascinating tidbits we learn about him from his parents. It's a nice reminder that there is a shining star who doesn't let the moral cesspool that is this town get him down.
Many other Port Charles residents could learn a lesson from Cam, because their sense of boundaries and common decency is seriously lacking!
Lisa: I get that Robin is still subjected to a whole lot of garbage from ignorant, small-minded people. I'm not judging her. But I can't believe you choose to keep quiet about something so huge in your life.
"I am so shocked, not to mention offended, that you didn't take it upon yourself to immediately notify your college girlfriend about your wife's medical condition! When you date someone in college, it bonds you for life, and you're entitled to know all about them for forever!'
To be fair to Lisa, it's entirely possible that she heard about how Patrick talked about another of his wife's medical conditions to everyone within earshot at the beginning of the year and that she's merely confused about this confidentiality thing starting now.
Patrick: Robin isn't sick, Lisa. We lead a very normal life.
Lisa: Except for the precautions you have to take while having sex, assuming you do have sex, and the baby wasn't born in vitro.
I'm trying to think of what kind of social disorder Lisa has that has led her to believe that interrogating her ex-boyfriend about his sex life and the conception of his child is appropriate. The first that comes to mind is Crazy Cakes, but I'm not sure if that's listed in the DSM-IV.