The Defense Rests, Your Honor
AWESOME WRITER: So...Sonny shot a police officer in the chest.
BOB GUZA: And the police officer turned out to be his own son. His own son!
AWESOME WRITER: Yeah, the foreshadowing on that one was ludicrously obvious.
BOB GUZA: Thank you.
AWESOME WRITER: I'm just wondering...how is it possible that Sonny can come back from that? I can't imagine one reason why he wouldn't wind up in jail for that.
BOB GUZA: You can't imagine ONE reason? I came up with, like, MULTIPLE reasons:
1. Sonny can't go to jail, because he's claustrophobic!
Jason: You gotta leave for your kids. We both know that you cannot survive being locked up.
Prison would be really horrible for him, on account of the claustrophobia and all. That just wouldn't be fair.
2. If cops weren't such depraved, inept individuals
AWESOME WRITER: Did you get a word-a-day calendar for your birthday?
BOB GUZA: How did you know? Anyway, if the cops didn't suck so bad--
AWESOME WRITER: That sounds more like you...
BOB GUZA: --this wouldn't have happened in the first place.
Olivia: What I'm seeing right here, it confirms everything that Sonny ever told me about you guys, that you're more concerned about throwing a net over him than you are about protecting anybody else, including Dante, supposed to be one of your own.
3. Sonny is a good father. Good fathers don't belong in jail. They belong out of jail, doing things that good fathers do, like having picnics or talking about the Yankees after they order hits.
Jason: No. We got as far as the tarmac. He didn't want to get on the plane, because he doesn't wanna leave Dante.
Sam: Ok, well, that's not surprising. He could spend the rest of his life in prison. It's, yeah, pretty consistent.
Jason: What do you mean?
Sam: Well, it's just Sonny's always all about the kids.
ALL about the kids!
4. Uh, a fucking abuser thinks he should be in jail!
Kiefer:You need to stop stressing over your dad. Unless that's how you wanna spend the rest of your life. Because guess what. He is never gonna change. Sonny corinthos is a gangster. He's a killer. Maybe some good'll come out of this and he'll finally go to prison.
Do you want to be like a violent, moody, abusive jerk? No, you don't.
AWESOME WRITER: So you root against the violent, moody, abusive jerk by rooting for another violent, moody, abusive jerk.
BOB GUZA: Also,
5. Sonny feels INCREDIBLY guilty about shooting his own son.
Olivia: Hey, don't think that Sonny's getting away clean on this, without any consequences. He shot his own son. The guilt is gonna eat him up alive.
AWESOME WRITER: Yeah, because that's more punishment than actual punishment.
BOB GUZA: Exactly! And you know the final reason that Sonny can't go to jail for shooting Dante?
6. Because Dante lied and said Sonny didn't shoot him!
Dante: Ah, he wasn't there, so I waited for him. I knew he kept a gun in his desk drawer, and I didn't want him to use it to try and resist arrest, so I thought I'd take the precaution of unloading it. The gun jammed. I worked it free. It went off. Sonny came in.
BOB GUZA: TWIST ENDING, BITCHES! All I know is that I keep hearing "Bob Guza's done it again!" and "Bob Guza better clear a spot on his mantle for another Emmy".
AWESOME WRITER: Where have you heard that?
BOB GUZA: From people, in places.
AWESOME WRITER: Places like your journal?
BOB GUZA: Either way, it's being said.