Who Do I Pay To Make This End?
I have a lot of questions about the storyline that combines Lauren, Jana, Daisy, Ryder, Mama Bear, Contrivance, Insanity, Inanity and Horror. Questions like "How?" and "Why?" and "Is Yvonne Zima secretly a robot, because her portrayal of human emotions is horrible" and "Who the crikey fuck thought that this story was a good idea?"
And all of those questions are still weighing heavily on my mind, because SERIOUSLY.
Daisy: Now I came to tell you myself. First off, Ryder and I...we totally did know each other from before, since the womb, in fact-- twinsies.
Daisy: Did I say I was done? Yeah, so Ryder's my brother, which means Tom is also my dad. Yay, me. But here's the best part, and I think you know where I'm going with this, right? This all leads back to our mom. Mm-hmm. Oh, deep down, you totally know who she is. Come on. You can say it. Think... your worst nightmare.
Lauren: Oh... my god. Sheila?
But the biggest, most serious question I have is: what do I have to do to make this stop? Because I'll do it. Hunger strike? Fine. Bribery? Okay. Pledging to include a positive mention of Maurice Benard in every blog entry I write for the next month? I'LL DO IT. I am DESPERATE. Because the end of today's show has me so apprehensive about tomorrow's episode that I've been contemplating attacking my TV, Office Space style, just so I don't have to sit through what is sure to be a ludicrous follow-up.