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« Confessions of a Teenager and a Drama Queen | Main | Being Boring »

May 03, 2010

Don't Look Back In Anger

I have practically made a career out of criticizing General Hospital and how epically it fails in nearly every conceivable way, but I can almost always be counted on to compliment (sometimes genuinely and effusively, sometimes half-heartedly, sometimes soaked with gallons of faint praise) the show's actors, or the majority of the show's actors, at any rate. They're almost always so good, and it's especially noticeable since the show's writing, editing and production values bring new meaning to the phrase, "OMFG, what the hell is this?"

Then there are days like today where everyone decided, "Enough of this. Why let my subtly expressive eyes have all the fun?! Come on, throbbing neck veins, let's show them how it's done!"






It was weird, how rage-y everyone was, although the image of Bruce Weitz watching this somewhere*, with a tear in his eye, saying, "You did good, kids. You did good" makes me want to shrug my shoulders and just roll with the camp. 

Why was everyone so furious, you wonder? Most of them were mad that Dante exists because, according to the town's murderers and mob molls, he is literally the worst human being to ever walk the planet.

Lulu: I'm respecting what Michael wants.
Carly: No, you are trying to rationalize. You're telling yourself anything to justify choosing Dante over your family. Michael needed you and you threw him under the bus.
Lulu: Yeah, I believe in Dante. I am on his side and I am not apologizing for that.
Carly: Then you're a selfish bitch.

Sonny: You didn't step up. YOU DIDN'T STEP UP. You turned him into the cops! Don't act like you did a good thing here!

Carly: Every time you wanted to talk about Johnny, or wanted to talk about Dante, or wanted to talk about YOUR MOTHER, I was there for you. And the one time I need you, you turn your back.

I can't even do justice to the acid in Carly's voice when she mentioned Laura.

And Lucky was mad at Jason, which (a) was awesome and (b) basically just confirms that he's going to hell or will at least be on the receiving end of some sort of humiliating storyline twist because Bob Guza just can't have that.

Jason: Does anyone know that you found Michael?
Lucky: I can't just act like Dante didn't tell the court that Michael did it. You understand what I'm saying?
Jason: Lucky, please.
Lucky: Stop living his life for him! It's over!!!

Luckily, Jason has no hard feelings. The only feeling he has for Lucky are positive ones, and the "i" in positive is dotted with a heart.

Jason: Lucky pulled a gun on me and I swear to you, if it was anyone else I'd have taken them out. But I don't want to hurt Lucky.

That's adorable, disturbing and sad all at once. Adorable, because holy mancrush, Batman!  Disturbing, because he's way too open about the fact that he's willing to kill cops (and to say that in a police station, of all places!). Sad, because Sonny's been dumped and he doesn't even know it.

*Not to slander Bruce Weitz by implying he has nothing better to do with his time than watch GH, or anything...

Hating Dante for his betrayal, and hating Lulu for her betrayal of not hating Dante took up the bulk of today's episode, but there were a couple of notable moments.

First, Carly had an epiphany that, maybe, she was partly responsible for Michael's life turning out the way it has.

Carly: I'm responsible for how Michael grew up. For putting him a world where things like this could happen. Hell, he wasn't even supposed to be at that stupid party that night, Jax.

Carly: He wanted to be just like Sonny, and now he is. Except Sonny never gets caught.

What an important realization to have, Carly! If only someone had pointed these things out to you earlier. Someone like, say, Jax, or the entire viewing audience or, you know, Carly Circa April 2008 which is when you last had this same exact moment of clarity.

Then, Lucky and the world's most spectacularly inept judge had a very long conversation about Michael and Lucky's fondness for him, which was all completely new information. I never imagined Lucky giving Michael a second thought (okay, okay, insert joke about the mental capacity of Greg Vaughan's Lucky here), but it turns out that he likes him a lot.

Judge Carroll: You seem to care for him very much.
Lucky: I have no reason not to, sir. Michael's my cousin, and we're not close. We don't spend that much time together, but of course, of course I care for him. On the surface, it might look like he's had a pretty easy life. He's always had plenty of money. He grew up being driven around in limos, surrounded by bodyguards, but Michael has suffered more in his short life than almost anyone I know, and if anyone deserves mercy from this court, it's him.

Which is good to know, I guess!

I feel like the show is moving towards a much more outwardly sympathetic Michael. We're hearing all about his hard life, and his brain damage and, in the form of Chad Duell, he looked like a terrified little boy on the witness stand.


Someone needs a hug!

It's entirely possible that this was the biggest reason for the recast. If Michael were to go to prison for Claudia's murder--I am not spoiled, but...he's going to, right? Because nobody in this town goes to prison for crimes committed with malice, so naturally a teenager is going to be jailed for killing in self-defense--he needs to look really vulnerable and, massive height aside, Chad Duell is. You sort of got the feeling with Drew Garrett that he could take care of himself in prison, because he's scrappy and had a tendency to be such a brat that nobody would want to start anything with him.


After today's scene with Lulu, I don't think I could muster any sympathy for Carly ever again, not that I ever had much to begin with, and I don't even care about Lulu.

Damn it all to hell I was hoping Jucky would die because that mancrush makes no sense on any level other than the backstage politics one that leaves me equally ragey. But you are right....Lucky is clearly being set up for massive trip to hell soon. Probably around the time of the birth of the child he doesn't know he's having right?

This week of all week's my gym decided to start putting the tvs on ABC. Which means when Carly started in on how Lulu should have been all about family...the rage/"come on" reaction was so great...a barbell may have fell on my foot. the pain was only slightly less excruciating than the usual pain we feel while watching GH.

"Sad because Sonny's being dumped and he doesn't even know it" rofl.....lol... that was brilliant.

Also didn't realise how ragey the show really was today until i saw those screencaps all in succession. I may be in the minority here but I enjoyed Carly's rant at Lulu... it was all soapy!

I get so tired watching MB. You can see the wheels turning in his brain as he tries so hard to remember his lines. (the same lines he's been saying for days, mind you.)

Why does everyone SCREAM on this show? It's like a million Sami Bradys all at once.

Oh how I love Lucky! From his comments to Jason about how he tries to live Michael's life for him, to his calm and reasoned remarks to the judge reminding the audience that the poor kid's been kidnapped MULTIPLE TIMES--JJ is just so damned good. And he broke Jason's black little hitman heart, bwahahaha.

Omg, Jason's "angry" face as he passes Dante is soo funny! lol he looks like a petulant child who was told he can't have cookies before dinner.

Yes, but did you see Jason's face when Lucky screamed at him about living Michael's life? Oh Em Jee! It was like Jason was stunned that anyone would have the nerve to actually yell back at him! Loved it. Hating Jason and his pouting.

Also just sick of Carly.

Jason's love for Lucky makes this show tolerable for me...And that's saying something considering on its best day GH is about as tolerable as a tooth-pulling by rusted wrench, while being forced to listen to a 13 year-old girl read all the Edward parts in Twilight in squealed tone of excitement in my ears, and as slivers of glass are dropped into my pried open eyes.

Loved everyone being all ragey.
LOVED Carly's rant on Lulu.
Loved Lucky's speech to the judge.
Loved Johnny's dig into Dante.

Hate, hate, hate Lulu! Dante's purpose for doing what he's doing at least has merit. Lulu's reason is 'so like I can support my BOYfriend.' (insert valley girly voice here.) Hate her.

I can't stand Carly, but find her tolerable occasionally. After that comment about Laura, however, she is permanently intolerable.I know Guza and Co. will probably never let Genie Francis near their set again, but I can dream about her coming back and having an epic smackdown with Carly, can't I?

And Lucky so rocks.

the sequence of angry screencaps made me ROFL!!! have stopped watching GH, but love your entertaining recaps that keep me updated!

love jason's heartshaped dot on the i for Lucky <3

I just can't get around the fact that chad is physically larger than everyone else.

DG's Michael would've been so infinitely more smug than CD's on the stand....I wish I'd gotten a chance to see that version....even though this one was pretty good too....

But while CD is gonna see prison Oz-style, DG would've probably been nobody's bitch!

DG would also not have required St Jasus's 564th melt-down on his behalf....

Honestly, Stone-cold you are NOT a parent, you are a MORON, please cease and desist with the inaccurate role-playing immediately...


Sonny: "...un..forgivable."
"...he'd be already dead."
I think Mo was having a really bad day (well more than usual)!! After all, Dante did happen to point out a fact nobody esle on this show... I believe it was "It's not about you, Sonny"
Dante freakin' rocks, but that's pretty much stating the obvious.

Michael did a good thing. Probably the first good thing he ever did in his young adult life by telling the truth. There may still be hope for him (especially with this new actor in the role). As for Sonny, Jason and Carly, it's their lying, murdering, selfish, covering-up ways they created this whole mess. They have nobody to blame but themselves for Michael being in this situation. After this storyline, I can plainly see that there is no hope for them. It would be almost funny if it weren't so tragically pathetic. The three donkeys creating a firestorm of mayhem all in the name of protecting Michael when in fact they cause that boy more harm then anyone else. Who Michael so desperately needs protection from are those three turds.

God, I miss Anthony Z! But right now *I* want to scream--I hate Sonny that much.

really funny what you said about Greg Vaughan lol he is hot, but no matter what they say JJ has the brain lol.
I really love JJ's Lucky! much better.

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