Couple of the Summer: Roxy and Clint?
As idiotic as Viki and Charlie's scheme against Dorian and David was last week, the upside was that, for once, Viki and Charlie were acting like children while Dorian got to be the one to actually walk away with some dignity. We should've known that wouldn't last.
Last week closed out with Dorian periodically changing her MyFace status (I'm pretty sure MyFace is also the name of the primary social networking site on the various Law and Orders. That or FaceSpace, occasionally. Why no Llanface? Or Llanbook?) in some passive-aggressive manner to let the citizens of Llanview know that she's not having an affair with Charlie and that she's not now nor has she ever been in love with David Vickers. Followed by David, of course, posting obnoxious comments on her status and... I mean the whole thing is so mind-numbingly stupid that it hurts to type out. And then of course Kelly and Destiny oh-so-wisely pointed out to Dorian and David that, naturally, Viki and Charlie were absolutely right and Dorian and David do love each other! Oh goodie. Maybe they'll have a series of near-misses or declarations right before he leaves the effing show again. To add insult to injury, Kelly announced that Dorian has been in love with David since the nineties and, sure, she loved Mel but David always had a place in her heart. No mention at all of Ray, the hottest romance she's had in a decade. I am starting to lose hope that they'll ever bring him back.
There are two major ways I'm making myself feel better about how incredibly stupid all of this is. One is imagining how Clint and Roxy have fallen very much in love and are off-screen having a torrid affair. There has to be some reason we haven't seen two of the best actors and characters this show has for months now, right? The other acceptable alternative is that the two of them have taken Sam on an extended Disney World vacation. Sure, I know they said he was out on the patio last week, but I believe only what I see.
The second way I'm making myself feel better is finding solace in the fact that at least this wasn't the stupidest thing to happen on ABC Daytime last week. The stupidest thing was not scooping up Michael Lowry to reprise the role of Ross (cutely telling the press he wasn't available was not as adorable as they think) while creating a new role entirely for Billy Warlock, but the second stupidest thing has deftly been analyzed in full by Mallory.