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« Decent Bits and Pieces | Main | A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Remote Control »

July 01, 2010

The Best and Worst of the 2010 Daytime Emmys

We know what you're thinking: "There were BESTS at the Emmys?" "You're listing the worst parts of the Emmys?! How long is this entry going to be?" "You guys haven't repressed those horrible memories already?"

But like Brick Tamland loves lamp, we love list and could not resist the opportunity to list the good and the bad of the 2010 Daytime Emmys, if only because the good moments really do deserve a chance to be highlighted. And then, once those two sentences are written, we can get on to making the producers aware of their staggering, dangerous incompetence.

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Worst Tribute: The Emmys Salute As the World Turns

We can't even, in good faith, refer to that as a tribute without scoffing and rolling our eyes dramatically. Devoting three minutes, at most, to a show that was on the air for 54 years and had a huge impact on daytime entertainment and pop culture in general (fun fact: Eileen Fulton's character provided inspiration to so many mothers across the country, including Mallory's grandmother, that Lisa became one of the most popular baby names from 1963-1976) (fun fact: Mallory is completely enamored with Fun Facts) is shameful. It's not like the show couldn't have cut a few minutes of Regis Philbin watch the audience respond to his poorly delivered jokes with awkward silence, or whittled down the advertisements for Cirque Du Soleil and The Blue Man Group (two things, incidentally, that became hugely popular IN THE '90s!).

Best Tribute: Agnes Nixon receives a Lifetime Achievement Award

It's a sad state of affairs when we are applauding a daytime-focused broadcast for taking a few minutes to honor a soap pioneer, but with the way the show had been going prior to the Lifetime Achievement Award, we were half expecting a repeat of the Lee Phillip Bell fiasco. Couldn't you have seen the camera panning to Agnes Nixon in the nosebleed seats and then cutting back to Regis as he introduced a performance from Yanni? But luckily we got a few sweet moments honoring a daytime icon and genius writer.

Biggest Absence: Tobias Funke

Sitting through The Blue Man Group was galling, because it had nothing to do with daytime and it was incredibly boring. If we HAD to watch this (and we shouldn't have had to because, as we hysterically noted multiple times on Sunday, it is 2010!), the least the show could have done was incorporated some Tobias! Although, to be fair, we think that most things in life would be improved with references to Arrested Development.

Tobias

See? This post just got ten times better!

Most "Ohmigod, did we time travel? What year is it? How did we all time travel at the same time? Wasn't there time travel on Lost? If we watched Lost, would we know how to deal with this? What the hell is going on? Should we call 911? What would we say to the paramedics?" Moment: How do we choose just one because, really, this show heavily featured Chubby Checker and Erik Estrada?

One of us was completely unfamiliar with at least half of the people who graced the stage (and was roundly mocked by the other for her ignorance) and the other half reached their peak level of fame in the mid-70s. And while some of these so-called special guests could be explained away with the Dick Clark/Bandstand tribute, others defy reason. David Copperfield, for fuck's sake! 

Worst Exclusion: The Red Carpet Pre-Show

Soap fans love their soap stars, and particularly love to see them dressed up in excessive sequins and hair extensions.  Even E! turned down the opportunity to air a red carpet show?  (We would suggest SOAPNet, but that would imply that the network relates to soap operas.

Saddest Omission: "The Year That Was" montage. 

Yes, this telecast was an advertisement for what entertainment is currently available in Vegas (and apparently exceeded last year's ratings handsomely enough to matter), but maybe if they'd had Penn and Teller conjure it up?  Or perhaps Criss Angel could've... levitated above it?  We are complete montage junkies, sure, but couldn't they have bothered to remind us what season of daytime these awards were even related to?  Considering they again nixed showing any of the Emmy reels that the actors submitted (just the 8-seconds-each reels for Best Show nominees only), it would have helped a little. 

Most Genuinely Surprised Winner: Julie Pinson

She seemed not only shocked but truly grateful, which was lovely.  Also, she got to kiss Billy Warlock, you guys!

Most Thinly Veiled Vegas Tourism Infomercial: The entire effing show.

It is truly difficult for anything related to Vegas to stand out as being particularly tacky, so we suppose congrats are in order to whoever cooked up this whole theme evening.

Biggest Reason to Turn Louise Grumpy: Well, duh.  The complete OLTL shutout. 

Sure, sure, they won a not-important-enough-for-the-low-quality-broadcast Emmy for the casting department (and considering the newbies they cast last year, we have to assume they're referring to the golden casting of such cruelly dismissed folks as Scott Clifton, Brett Claywell, and Scott Evans).  This raises the worrisome possibility that the show-runners will decide that last year was dismal, ergo what's going on this year must be fantastic!  This would be poor logic and almost certain cancellation.

Best Attempt to Make Us Miss Sherri Shepherd and Cameron Mathison: Regis Philbin

Starting the show off with a fat joke about Susan Lucci lent a grim layer of awkwardness to the telecast and it only went downhill from there. It was like he was trying to be terrible!  His performance was, however, yet another ringing endorsement of Kelly Ripa's amazing powers to improve those around her.  We are going to go buy some Eletrolux appliances just to help her out a bit as a token of our gratitude.

Cuddliest Moment to Almost-But-Not-Quite Happen: Trevor St. John was clearly escorting Michael Easton onto the stage by the arm for their Outstanding Lead Actress announcement. 

Was this supposed to lead to some absurd "bit?"  Or are the two of them just way more adorbs than either of the douchebags they play on TV?

Best Concerted Effort to Send Mallory to the Loony Bin with a Stopover in Rage-y Yelltown: Sharon Case's Hair

LAS VEGAS - JUNE 27: Actors Joshua Morrow and Sharon Case attends the 37th Annual Daytime Entertainment Emmy Awards held at the Las Vegas Hilton on June 27, 2010 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Christopher Polk/Getty Images for ATI)

WHY IS IT LIKE THAT, WHYWHYWHYWHY?

Best Loser: Charles Pratt

There are people who say there are no winners and losers, only nominees and those who "the award goes to."  These people are stupid.  There are losers, and specifically in the writing category, there is giant loser Charles Pratt, known in some circles by the alias "THE WORST". The man basically set fire to AMC and its history and was rewarded with a nomination. Two words: Stuart, murdered. Three more words: Adam, killed, him. And another three words: Erica, Ryan, s*x. Fortunately -- and we say this knowing absolutely nothing about the quality of The Bold and the Beautiful over the last year -- justice prevailed and Pratt lost.  Never have we been happier to dub someone a loser.

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Notice how there was an obvious lack of "Bests" on this best and worst list, and that the smattering of bests we found were actually thinly veiled criticisms? Yeah. We really did try to search for the good in this show, but it just couldn't happen. What an embarrassment.

Comments

SC's hair could have been worse. The "tribute" as I've said, sucked. Bad. Three seconds of some intern looking shit up online, set to music. It's a disgrace to the industry that Helen Wagner, James Mitchell and Francis Reid were not honored. Why have the show at all? If it weren't for actors like them none of these people would have jobs and the genre wouldn't be as popular as it is. I know I'm sour here, but it pisses me off. I'd love to say something positive in light of the CBS takeover of winnings....so go ATWT. We'll miss you.

Worst Tribute: The Emmys Solute As the World Turns

How about Biggest Relief of the Night? Bold and the Beautiful wins 2nd Best Show Emmy. Cause if one of the other three shows had one...well we all know what would have happened.

And I also have biggest improvement over last year....Brad Bell being allowed to GIVE an acceptance speech for best show!

Worst Techinical Problem aka What is this? The Tonys? The continual hot mics. I really didn't need to know that they had only gave Agnes Nixon 30 seconds to speak after her Lifetime Achievement award...but I do because I could hear her worrying about the standing O cutting into her time.

Oh I can shed light on the Michael Easton- Trevor St. John thing....in rehersal they decided to come out holding hands and CBS nixed it. So they switched it to the escorting by the arm thing. I'm thinking it was meant to be a comment on Kish but I'm not sure about that. But it was a thing they had worked out before hand.

You had me at "but like Brick Tamland loves lamp, we love list." Any and all "Anchorman" references are always greatly appreciated.

Oh and also, the Daytime Emmys sucked hardcore this year. Yikes.

In 2008, Lee Phillip Bell's tribute was mostly during the Creative Arts Emmy's which they were kind enough to have a webcast of that year. Yes, she should of been recognized at the main ceremony. I am pretty sure the Daytime Emmy's will soon be a webcast.

Regarding Sharon Case's hair: I give it another 6 months before it overtakes Stonehenge as mankind's greatest unsolved mystery.

It's funny all I could think of during the Blue Man group thing was Tobias. It got me through having to watch it that's for sure! lol!

For some reason, all your Emmy coverage has got me brainstorming what my ideal soap cast might look like. Here's what I got so far:

Gina Tognoni
Julie Pinson
Michelle Stafford
Judi Evans (formerly Luciano)
Kelly Menighan Hensley
Collen Zenk Pinter
Erica Slezak
Robin Strasser
Eileen Davidson
Debi Morgan
Crystal Chappell
Louise Sorel
Nancy Lee Grahn
Jane Elliot
Andrea Evans
Beth Chamberlin
Lynn Herring (miss her!)

...and I guess I should pick some dudes.

As a Lisa born in the '60's, to a family of CBS soap viewers, this is definitely a sad time.

It's doubly sad because I think that means I'm old enough to be Mallory's mother. And Mallory? So it's a family trend to name babies after TV characters?

Was this blog a destiny sort of thing?

The following explains why the show was so "Vegas heavy" this year:

So this year production company ATI made a Faustian bargain with CBS and the Las Vegas Hilton. Essentially, the network paid nothing for the show and ATI and CBS split the proceeds from the advertisements that the production company managed to sell. In order to get the Daytime Emmys on the air, they would be about Las Vegas, not daytime.

Entire article at http://www.fancast.com/blogs/2010/tv-news/deep-soap-a-tale-of-two-daytime-emmys/

Oooh, GOTTA make Best Loser a tie - Pratt and GH. If they had won, I may have had a coronary.

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