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« Fear and Loathing in Port Charles | Main | Our Column in the 7/13 Issue of Soap Opera Digest »

July 05, 2010

What a Cliffhanger That Was, Huh?

It's not that I'm surprised that Bob Guza ripped off his own acclaimed story by bringing a car bomb into the year 2010, since his entire career consists of coasting on Clink-Boom ("You haven't gotten your walking papers yet? How the hell not?" "Uh, remember Clink-Boom? That was all me?" "...a scene in the mid-90s probably shouldn't guarantee lifelong job security." "It was totally acclaimed".) What I AM surprised about is how surprised I am that it was so poorly done. You'd think I'd know by this barrel has no bottom.

Soap Opera 101 CLEARLY states (or it would clearly state, if it were a real class and I were the instructor) that a Friday episode should end on a shocking note, leading viewers to wish that Monday would hurry up and get there. Now, I'm not saying that there is anything really shocking about this car bomb situation, because it's become routine for Sonny to have a monumentally stupid idea that will have life-threatening consequences for at least one of his children, but really! To go from Johnny and/or Kristina going all explod-ey while Sonny cowered in the garage wondering how the hell he's going to be able to explain this one

Sonny

to Jason and Dante questioning Woman We've Never Seen Before (AKA Franco's mother AKA James Franco's mother Betsy)* to a cleaned up Franco presenting Maxie with a flower** sort of lessened the impact dramatically.

Maybe General Hospital figured that the tragic consequences of Sonny's bomb had been so clearly telegraphed, what with Sonny growling three times an episode about how no one but Johnny could get hurt, that it wasn't surprising enough to count as a cliffhanger? And, really, I should be grateful that they didn't end the episode on Patrick and Lisa*** making the beast with two sets of seriously lame college stories****, because then I'd have gone blind and spending the holiday weekend blind is no one's idea of fun, so I suppose I should be thankful for the, um, palate cleanser of a car bomb and a serial killer...

*This was hugely dumb, but it did lead to Dueling Duh Faces

Duelingduhface

**It says a lot about how spectacularly his last stint failed and how little faith I have in this writing staff that even I, admitted James Franco fangirl, reacted to this with, "Oh, pretty. But ugh, this again?". Except I draw the "ugh" and the "again" out for a really long time to best express my disdain because REALLY. And if I, with cartoon hearts flying out of my head and bearing scars from seeing Nights in Rodanthe, am saying this, I can only imagine how everyone else feels.

***Ick nast.

****Is anyone else surprised that Lisa and Patrick's reminiscing on Friday didn't garner GH a TV-MA rating?! Talking about college kids drinking and having sex. Consider my pearls clutched

Comments

I don't think that Guza understands the meaning of cliffhanger Friday. I can't remember the last time I was shocked or surprised or feeling like I couldn't wait to find out what happened next on this show.

I saw a spoiler pic of Alexis slapping Johnny because of the car bomb, and all I could think is, why isn't she slapping the bajeezus out of Sonny? You know, the man who actually ORDERED the bomb, thinking that this was a totes BRILL idea despite both his wife Lily and Alexis's sis Kristina I exploding in bombs that were intended for him? Talk about blaming the victim...

Like you, I'm just thankful that they didn't end cliffhanger Friday with Patrick and Lisa. I must say that they're doing a bad job of making Lisa seem an exciting and thrilling party girl.

Someone needs to bring those two to 2010 because their college days were lame.

Poor Robin, who will have to apologize to Patrick because he couldn't keep it in his pants...this is Guza.

Also hugely dumb....does Guza honestly think there is only one place in the world other than Port Charles and said place is Bensonhurst? Look I know it's a populous area of the city but how can it be still since it seems EVERY CITIZEN IN PORT CHARLES IS FROM THAT NEIGHBORHOOD?

What will Dante now have memories of playing with this weird Franco kid now?

I cannot BELIEVE I AM TYPING THESE WORDS, but I have to defend Guza in that I don't think he has much if any input into editing, so it isn't his fault they put two scenes after what should have been the cliffhanger. I know need to go take a shower now to try and wash all the filth off me.

Editing has been a little off kilter, that's for sure. There have been some very abrupt cuts that kind of give you a faceplant. Well, more of a faceplant.

This show is so predictable. Yawn. I haven't even been able to be excited that Alexis is on, and that's a tragedy because Nancy Lee Grahn is the only reason I watch at all.

I can't remember the last time I was shocked or surprised or feeling like I couldn't wait to find out what happened next on this show. I saw a spoiler pic of Alexis slapping Johnny because of the car bomb, and all I could think is, why isn't she slapping the bajeezus out of Sonny?

I can't remember the last time I was shocked or surprised or feeling like I couldn't wait to find out what happened next on this show. I saw a spoiler pic of Alexis slapping Johnny because of the car bomb, and all I could think is, why isn't she slapping the bajeezus out of Sonny?

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