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« Hi, Infidelity | Main | Songs In The Key of CRAZY »

August 27, 2010

Failing At Soap Opera 101

The last scene of today's All My Children was a failure on multiple levels.

Ryan: Friends?
Greenlee: Friends.
Ryan: Okay.
Greenlee: You know, if I did still have feelings for you, those kinds of feelings, I wouldn't make up excuses to see you. You'd know how I'd feel. I'd just tell you. Hell, I'd show you.

FAILURE #1: This was a ridiculously boring scene to end a ridiculously boring episode. Judging by the notes I took (don't judge me!) after spending today catching up on this week's episodes, I actually have A LOT to say about the current state of All My Children. Well, maybe not A LOT, since I had included "Shut it, Krystal", or some variation of that phrase, as multiple points of discussion, because she is just that irksome. But enough is going on that I have plenty of material for commentary and then came today's episode, which had me contemplating writing the show a letter in favor the cast getting a nice raise in pay, because anybody who was able to make it through their scenes without falling asleep deserves some sort of monetary praise. And what a horrible cliffhanger. I always thought that soap episodes were supposed to end with something intriguing, so that viewers would be excited for the next episode. I didn't even realize that AMC had ended until my DVR asked me if I wanted to delete this episode!

FAILURE #2: Any line of dialogue spoken to or by Greenlee and Ryan regarding their feelings for one another is offensive enough to warrant an FCC fine.

FAILURE #3: The last AMC-related thing any of us saw was Ryan Lavery making a combination smug/befuddled face, which really gets our weekend off to a rocky start, since now we're all in the mood to punch things...

More AMC thoughts to come this weekend: Zendall! David "You can't spell David without the letter v, which is also in the word evil" Hayward! The JR/Annie/Scott/Booooring quad and more!


LOL. Ryan does get the weekend off to a bad start. This is probably the most boring show on the air

I could totally live without the Scott/Booooring part of the quad, that is to say, I am totally rooting for JR/Annie. I'm surprised to say I actually like the idea of that going somewhere.

Should you care to comment any more about the Quad, make note of all the bizarre ways the writers manage to make them "meet" so they can say variations of the same thing to each other. (And by variations, I mean, pretty much same-old, same-old except for the pronouns.) It's like someone has a big spoon to stir the four of them around in the big vat that is Pine Valley: BJ's, Chandler living room, The Park benches, BJ's entrance, Chandler hall, The Park walkway . . .

Oh - and maybe mention Failure #4: Madison, sans bookends. Tsk.

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