Pretty much every single aspect of the "Brook Lynn drugs Dante because she needs money and because Carly's idea of a 'master revenge plan' includes pimping someone out in order to create romantic discord" is loathsome. I mean, let's just break that sentence apart, okay?
Brook Lynn--who,can I remind you, is the daughter of NED and LOIS, and the granddaughter of TRACY. Cue the General Hospital writers saying, "Well, you said you wanted more Quartermaines, so...?"--
drugs Dante--I think the only two words to describe that are "UGH" and "abhorrent". I mean, honestly, it doesn't matter that she didn't have sex with him while he was out; she still drugged her so-called lifelong friend--
because she needs money--she can't touch her trust, right? And she doesn't want to go to Edward and get money from him, since it would come with all sorts of crazy conditions. For me, if the choice is between being micro-managed or becoming a seducer for hire, I'm going with the micro-management--
and because Carly's idea of a 'master revenge plan' includes pimping someone out in order to create romantic discord--STUPID.
There is all sorts of what-the-fuckery in every level of this storyline, and now that we've moved onto the fallout portion, it's only getting worse, because what we're getting from Brook is smug face.
Is there anything more irritating than a soap character being accused of something that they actually did and reacting with outrage and condescension? The answer is...well, probably there is, yeah, but this is also seriously irksome.
Maxie: I'll bet money I know what happened last night: you called Dante at Jake's, had this sob story, claimed you needed to talk to your old friend from Bensonhurst. He got there, you drugged his drink and tried to take advantage of him.
Brook: I expected so much more from you, Maxie. I mean, come on. We were drugged together in college. I don't have to drug men to to be with me. That's something you would have to do.
Maxie: Oh, but you did have to drug him, Brook Lynn. Because liquor wouldn't have been enough. You could poor vodka down his throat for six straight hours and he still wouldn't have been interested in a slut like you.
Brook: You want the facts? Dante had one beer and he invited me back to his place. And I couldn't leave him alone. He was lonely and Lulu doesn't understand him.
Maxie: Are you serious? Is that the best excuse you could come up with?
Brook: Yeah, well, it's the truth.
It's not that I expect Brook to be so filled with guilt or shame that she immediately comes clean about the fact that she is a whirling dervish of destruction and skank, but if she could dial the smugness down a notch or twelve, it would make this more bearable. Only slightly more bearable, but still.
The only silver lining, and it's a small one, is that I am seriously enjoying Maxie in fiercely protective friend/knowledgeable ex-homewrecker mode. I love that she knew exactly what went down between Dante and Brook Lynn, and that she's inherently suspicious of Lisa because she knows, from experience, what it looks like to be a deranged schemer (I think she could use all of her poor life decisions for good and become a seriously successful relationship guru for others) and I also loved:
Maxie: You say one more thing about Lulu and I will personally rip all of the hair out of your head.
Do it, Maxie, do it!