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« In Which I Go Deaf, Dumb and Blind | Main | The Trauma of a Bad Pirate Costume: Pluses and Minuses »

September 21, 2010

A Good Man Is Hard To Find

It seems as though an All My Children writer caught an episode of General Hospital in which the fawning over Jason was at a fever pitch. "Oh, you think that's propping?", the AMC writer may have scoffed. "I'll show you propping. I'll prop like propping's never been propped before!", adding a decisive "PROP!" for good measure.

How else can you explain today's episode of AMC, which should have been titled "goodRyangoodIsgoodAgoodGoodgoodMan".

Tad: You're different...that moral compass of yours would point you right straight to prison.

Madison: Greenlee says it's the hero thing. That's part of what makes Ryan so attractive.

Madison: His bravery and his selflessness is part of what makes Ryan such an amazing man.

Tad: Ryan Lavery is a good man. He's got friends, he's got family, and Hayward is Hayward. If you ask me, the real crime would be letting Ryan go to prison for doing something like that.

Liza: You don't know how much this is absolutely killing me, to go after one of the finest men in this town.

The only thing less subtle would be a lavish musical number with feathers, and jazz hands, and background singers shimmying while holding signs saying "Ryan Is A Good Man!"

And to think I had been almost not dreading this episode, thanks to this intriguing description on my DVR!

The mystery of the secret drawer's contents continue.

Does that sound like the blurb for a particularly awesome Nancy Drew book or what? Well, the more accurate DVR descrition would have read OMG, VOMIT.

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Aside from the extreme Ryan-propping, this episode featured another of my least favorite recurring elements: the unbearable toolishness of the Martin brothers.

Tad spent much of the episode attempting to guilt Liza for her role in investigating David's death, threatening to conveniently lose any information that could link Ryan to David's death and bringing up a story we all try so hard to forget.

Tad: If I had done something like this, disposed of someone like Hayward, it would be tough, but I could find a way to live with it.

Um, it's kind of not an "if" situation, Tad. I know no one in Pine Valley knows that, but I do, and it annoys me.

Jake is an even bigger jerk, though. He can hate David all he wants, but angrily ripping up David's "suicide letter"* that so obviously moved Amanda was a total dick move.

Amanda: Trevor, that's where I saw it, Jake. That he had a heart. Look, I don't know why he did what he did, but Greenlee is right. This letter is a gift to our family.
Jake: You don't really believe that, do you?
Amanda: He didn't have to write it.
Jake: He didn't have to do a lot of things. He didn't have to try to have you bear his children. Do you remember that? I remember that. He did not have a heart.
Amanda: Jake, don't do that, it's disrespectful.
Jake: Disrespectful? You know how I respect? Whoever got rid of David. THAT's who I respect.

The fact that Ricky Paull Goldin currently looks like a used car salesman circa 1976 is not helping things.

(*I think we can all agree that these letters are completely bogus and were written by Greenlee, right? Because there is no way the story can wrap up that easily.)

(The scene at the very end of the episode, where Greenlee curled up with a blanket and said, "Forgive me?", was the best acting Rebecca Budig has done lately. For the past few weeks, she has just been...off. And I say that as someone who adores her! But today she was quite good).

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Also in Pine Valley...

  • Kendall's freaking out over how to tell Zach that she was arrested is humorous, because Alicia Minshew sells the neurotic rambling

Kendall: What am I supposed to say? "Hi, honey. Things are going great here. I'm hanging out at Fusion, hanging out with my friends and, oh, I have some felony charges against me, too. Isn't that great? Oh, why, you ask? Because I was helping out Ryan and Greenlee, you know? That's what I always do, I know that makes you so happy, it's why we left Pine Valley in the first place but hey, things happen!

But COME ON. Zach totally knows this already! Delaying the inevitable will only lead to problems down the road!

  • Frankie and Randi had sex in a hospital bed, which is disturbing, and then they talked about her getting pregnant at the same time as his mother, which is equally disturbing, but Denise Vasi was so distracting. I am like a broken record on this subject, but she is just SO BAD. She should start a rumor that she's really a robot, because then her lifelessness would at least be expected.
  • Madison: I know I don't have the same history with Ryan that Greenlee has. They're just like this myth, you know?

Less a myth and more an epic tragedy, Mads.

Comments

Thankfully, I wasn't the only one grossed out by Frandi's hospital bed sex. Not sure why, but when it happens on Grey's Anatomy, I seem to be okay with it, but that's probably because it isn't in a hospital bed The only thing worse than Denise Vasi's acting (er, robotics) is Cornelius' (last name?) over acting. Also, I'm not sure if anyone else notices this, but it seems that Jesse and Frankie can only kiss their wives when they first bend slightly at the knees. That has been driving me totally crazy.

I am so sick of the Ryan worship on AMC that it is making me not want to watch. What is most disturbing to me is the fact that once again they are creating stupid plot so Kendall can sing Ryan's praise for more days. She is living at his home, because he has to keep and eye on her, as she roams around PV. I wish I understood how a guy who is up for murder can house the person that stole evidence and burned it for him. Beats me why this show continues to worship the Lavery and continues to write women as stupid.

This show is a total dud. I'm waiting for TK to return- I'm afraid he won't stay for long & that really disappoints me because if he doesn't, there's no possiblie way I'm sticking around for this hot mess. You pretty much nailed it Mallory.

Oh Mallory you say what I'm thinking only you say it MUCH better!! I've been reading the rundowns of the show weekly just to try to get a feel for what TK/Zachs story might be when he comes back which is the only time I will EVER watch this joke of a show again. It looks like his story will be to join in the praises of St. Lavery or will they have him go to prison for the the Saint of PV?? I love TK and can't decide whether to hope he comes back only for a short stay and never again and moves on to something else or to stay and try to deal with the ongoing worship of the We Love Lavery show...... Keep calling it what it is and THANKS Mallory!!

I think God everyday that I turned this miss of a show off on 12/29/09. Without TK's Zach there is absolutely NO reason for me to watch. And just reading about the Ryan Show makes me cringe. And Kendall?? God, I love her with Zach, but w/o him . . . more cringing!!

Come back TK . . . come back!!

I thank God everyday that I turned this miss of a show off on 12/29/09. Without TK's Zach there is absolutely NO reason for me to watch. And just reading about the Ryan Show makes me cringe. And Kendall?? God, I love her with Zach, but w/o him . . . more cringing!!

Come back TK . . . come back!!

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