Reunions and Rylee: A Recap
Inspired by Louise, and in desperate need of a reason to watch an episode of All My Children all the way through rather than fast-forwarding to parts that don't make me want to projectile vomit, I decided to kick it recap-style for Friday's episode. Read on to see all of the...well, actually, not much happened, and most of what did happen was less than great, with one notable (!), light-hearted (!!) exception.
We begin with Kendall doing her community service grunt-work when Greenlee comes in to ask a favor of her: she wants Kendall to ask Ryan to stay away from the trial. Kendall reluctantly agrees to talk to Ryan, but reminds Greenlee that once Ryan has his mind made up about something, it's not easy to sway him. Probably because his mind is literally incapable of pondering two things at once. Greenlee is nervous, sometimes believing Jackson that there simply isn't enough evidence and sometimes having horror-filled visions of jumpsuits and bad prison food. As she leaves, Kendall attempts to give her a hug and Greens is noticeably squicked out.
Ha! I have to say, as much as I enjoy watching Rebecca Budig and Alicia Minshew have such fun together, the show did not let the fallout from Greenlee's (YES, GREENLEE'S) plan to ruin Erica's reputation and her knowledge of the truth behind Erica's plane crash to play out properly. Kendall and Bianca should have been furious with Greenlee for months, but all of that was dropped in an instant as part of the show's "Greenlee did some terrible things. Oh, wait, she didn't really. Nevermind" campaign.
Speaking of Ryan (aren't we always?), he is on the phone with Jackson, who asks if he really wants to go through with the plan to prove Greenlee's innocence at his own expense. Madison catches the tail end of the conversation, in which he tells Jack he'll see him in a few minutes, and wonders why he's going to court, since Greenlee seemed pretty adamant that she wanted him nowhere near the courtroom. She thinks Greenlee has a point, but Ryan insists that he has to be there. Madison offers to go with him, but he basically tells her thanks, but no thanks.
Over at Jesse and Angie's, he has made her French toast and frets that maybe she shouldn't be eating before her amnio, but she assures him that she could even jog if she wants to. OF COURSE, talk turns to the trial and Angie admits that she's not so sure the right person was arrested for David's murder.
Back in court, Liza and Jackson spar the way that television prosecutors and defense attorneys do, all politely-delivered insults about the other looking tired.
At the hospital, Kendall's supervisor Leona compliments her on her fantastic cleaning skills, and is impressed that Erica Kane's daughter handled the whole community service thing so well. Talk segues to Kendall's husband and she gives a wistful, breathless monologue about reuniting with Zach:
Kendall: I miss him so much. I know this is gonna sound completely ridiculous and silly -- it's like this is straight out of a romance novel -- but I have this fantasy that I'm wearing this long, flowy dress and I've got a little flower tucked behind my ear and I'm on a beautiful hillside, and he comes riding back to me on this big white horse. Yeah. Anyway, that's what I think about when I stare into this bucket of muddy water.
Leona is not amused.
Kendall is gobsmacked, Leona departs with a hilariously delivered "Forgot your horse" and Zach admits that he didn't want to be without his family anymore, so he made the last-minute decision to head back to Pine Valley.
Kendall: Tell me you're here to stay.
Zach: Did she teach you how to give a sponge bath?
Kendall: I could figure it out.
Zach: Then I'm here to stay.
It goes without saying that Alicia Minshew and Thorsten Kaye work amazingly well together.
At Ryan's, Madison is trying to convince Ryan to let her tag along for moral support. He asks her to please trust him which...I totally wouldn't, but Madison is a sap and does. He gives her a kiss and--Awkward!--she tries to go back for another, but he has already moved on.
that things aren't so bad. He even makes awkward dad jokes to lessen the tension and it almost works until he asks her to trust him. Since he's asked her that, oh, dozens of times, she puts two and two together, concluding that he has something planned.
Jesse and Angie: she points out that Greenlee was one of many people who despised David, and Jesse proves her point by saying:
Jesse: And he pushed her so far -- I know exactly how she was feeling. He pushed me to the point where I wanted to wrap my hands around his throat and squeeze that bile-ridden life out of him.
Back in court, Greenlee is looking around to make sure that Ryan's not there when--you'll never believe it--he doucheily walks in with a pleasant "Good morning!" Liza is obviously delighted by this turn of events.
Greenlee, meanwhile, handles it about as well as you'd expect; she handles it poorly, is what I'm saying, announcing to Judge Kimberlin Brown that she wants Ryan out.
What a weird role for her, right? It's bizarre to see Sheila presiding over this farce of a trial, acting like a school marm. She urges Jack to get Greenlee under control and Liza innocently (and hilariously!) wonders if the pair had a lover's spat. She eventually calls for the bailiff, and the next shot is Ryan being tossed out of the courtroom by the two luckiest dayplayers in soapdom.
At Angie and Jesse's: she tries to change the subject, explaining that she needs to relax, and he immediately knows that something's up, since Angie's not the relaxing sort. She finally admits to him that David is (in a roundabout, "not really" kind of way) responsible for her blindness.
Let's check in with the Slaters: Zach tries to charm Leona into letting Kendall off for the afternoon, but she's thoroughly unimpressed. He offers to help her clean up so they can get to their reunion faster. He's all cuddly and she is just blissfully happy. When she apologizes for getting wrapped up in the Pine Valley drama, he tells her:
Zach: Six years ago, I met this woman, this incredible woman. She's complicated, emotional. She does things without really thinking of what the ramifications might be. She loves her family and her friends, and sometimes she has to pay the price. You know what? I knew all that when I fell in love with her. I'm not gonna change her now.
Inside, Jack is calling Nick Pearson to the stand, which baffles Liza, since he said nothing of interest during her interview with him. Kimberlin Brown tells her that she should have done her homework better.
Kendall talks and talks (and talks) about how her heart is in Pine Valley and Zach tells her that they are in Pine Valley for good. Then they kiss.
Their scenes made me so happy. Part of it is that I just love them together, especially when the writing is good which, surprisingly, it was here, and it was so nice and refreshing to have humor and romance, both of which are rarely seen in Pine Valley.
At Angie and Jesse's, she is explaining to him how David's cutbacks led to her infection, which...they are laying it on SO thick with the Evil David stuff these days that it's almost comical. It reads as a parody of a soap opera sometimes. But because they are awesome (and way too good for this show), Debbi Morgan and Darnell Williams gave it their all as Angie confessed the extent of her hatred, and she and Jesse both broke down. She tells Jesse that she didn't tell him this to begin with because she was terrified that he'd kill David, and then launches into a speech for next year's Emmy reel.
Angie: I would've said that David Hayward was single-handedly destroying Pine Valley hospital, that he cared more about the bottom line than human lives. And I can't entirely blame him for what happened to me, but I can blame him for forcing me to make a terrible choice, a choice that will affect the rest of my life, my family, my career. And thanks to how rotten and cold-hearted he was, I won't be able to see our baby -- his first smile, his first steps. Instead, I'm in the dark! I'm in the dark, and he stole from me! And now there is no way that I can make him pay. And I'm a Christian woman and I try not to hate, but I swear to God I hate David Hayward. I hate him, Jesse! I hate him!
She is amazing.
Over in the Land of Ridiculous Trials, Madison has figured out Ryan and Jackson's cunning plan and is none too happy about it.
Hospital: Zach steps in a bucket.
Zach: These are brand-new shoes. I just had these bought for me.
Angie and Jesse's: Jesse is angry that he didn't get rid of David while he could, and is overcome with guilt, but Angie urges him to move forward with no regrets.
At the courthouse, Ryan tries to tell Madison that he's sorry for putting her through this. Oh, really? Madison calls his bluff and tells him to stop, but he insists that it will work. Getting ever pissier, she points out that he is risking abandoning Spike and Emma, and wonders what his genius plan will do for him when Greenlee gets acquitted and he's on trial. She then stomps out to get some air and I cross all of my fingers, hoping that she will end this relationship. Of course, this would mean that she would also end her relationship with airtime, so...
Jack and Liza approach the bench, and Liza insists that the Nick Pearson testimony is ridiculous. She lamely tries to say that it violates rules of discovery, as if this entire sham of a trial doesn't violate every rule of common sense and decency. Kimberlin Brown says that Jack can continue questioning.
Jack starts to ask about this mysterious murder predictor, and "suspensful" music starts to play. Nick looks around the courtoom and can't see the guy he's talking about, until...Ryan walks in! "Oh, yeah, that's the douche I was talking about", Nick Pearson might as well have said.
Angie and Jesse are at the hospital now for Angie's amnio. They are as adorable as they are nervous.
Zach carries Kendall into their house
and she is so excited to have him home. Alicia Minshew is the cutest as she points out the scratches that she, Zach and the boys created, and is thrilled that there are so many memories in their house. He suggests that they make more nicks and scratches, wink-wink, nudge-nudge, and they make their way over to the couch when...Zach's phone rings. And even though Kendall asks him not to answer it, he does, having a conversation that consists entirely of "Slater......got it". He then drops the bombshell that he's not going to stay in Pine Valley after all.
The "Trial": Nick Pearson testifies that he waited to come forward because the night of David's death, he was spending time with someone other than his wife. When it's Liza's turn to question, she basically accuses Jack of bribing and threatening him. He puts on a noble act, saying it's his duty to testify or whatever, and Kimberlin Brown calls a recess. Greenlee? Is PISSED.
At the hospital, Jesse and Angie chat after her amnio. He sweetly kisses her belly button and they make plans to spend the rest of the day relaxing on their couch.
Meanwhile, Greenlee confronts Ryan about his plan and he admits that he's doing whatever it takes to get her acquitted. She says that it all hinges on getting people to believe that he's still in love with her, but that can't possibly be true, right? Right? He non-answers that he needs to leave, and she asks him what it means that he's willing to risk his freedom for her. It means that the writers of this show are creatively bankrupt and unwilling to let go of a pairing that has failed every time they've tried it, Greenlee. That's what it means.
And with that "engrossing" and "intriguing" cliffhanger, we're done. Well...at least there was Zach and Kendall, because the rest of the show is yawn city.