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« About That AMC Spoiler... | Main | Attack of the Killer Twins »

November 08, 2010

Burning Down The House

I am completely surprised--not at General Hospital because, duh. I'm sure that the "Welcome To Port Charles" sign, featuring an ever dwindling population count, notes that the town is the Predictability Capital of America. The only surprise here is just how badly the writers manage to bungle something. I am surprised at myself. Because when there was a raging fire at Mac's (a fire SO CUNNING that it managed to evade smoke detectors and Robin's sense of smell), all I did was get peeved at the sloppy writing. I didn't look at the big picture and get righteously angry that Bob Guza & Company once again LITERALLY SET FIRE TO THE HISTORY OF THIS SHOW! Where are my priorities?! I am totally off my game, you guys.

It was sort of heartbreaking to listen to the assorted members of the Scorpio/Jones clan discuss their memories of the house. Not least because so many of the people they mentioned have been killed off or considered useless by the show.

Mac: I guess the lesson is nothing lasts forever. Felicia left. Georgie's dead. Robin and Maxie moved on and are starting lives of their own, and now my house is gone. 

Felicia, Georgie, Robert, Anna: gone. One of them (who, as I often say, could have driven story for decades, or at least until GH's cancellation) was murdered by an undead serial killer and the existence of the rest is practically offensive to the writing staff. Between this and Edward's depressing meta-commentary on the status of the Quartermaines, it's like the writers are giving us the finger and I do not like it.

On the plus side, it did give us some great moments with Kirsten Storms, Kimberly McCullough and John J. York. On the negative side...everything else.

Robin: How's the house?
Mac: Robin, that's something else you don't have to worry about.
Robin: I am worried about it. I'm worried about it. I grew up there. I need you to be straight with me. Please.
Mac: It's a total loss. I haven't gone through everything, I don't know what I'll find--
Robin: All of our things and our pictures and our heirlooms, it's like--it's all gone?
Mac: Listen, listen to me. Robin, sweetheart. It's a loss that'll hurt for a long time but it's just a house. Listen to me. Our family is safe and alive. That's all that matters.

Kimberly McCullough reacted to the loss of Robin's family home with palpable grief and sorrow. I suppose when a character has gone through as much as Robin has, an actress becomes really good at conveying heartache. She should give lessons to some of her co-stars, because a few of them have reacted to the loss of a loved one with half the emotion and double the duh face. 

The easiest way to distract me from the trauma of Kirsten Storms's hair and makeup choices is to have Maxie talk about Georgie.

Maxie: You know what's killing me? That we lost Georgie again. All that was left of my sister was in her room and now it's gone. I used to go in there sometimes when I miss her. I could still feel her. Somehow she was accessible. All I'd have to do was just open Georgie's treasure box and, I don't know, take out the locket my mom gave her for Christmas one year. Georgie used to love holding that locket because she said it made her feel connected to our mom, and I believe that's true because I felt connected to Georgie when I would hold it. I just can't believe this is all happening. 

Sniff.

She was also adorable with Matt, and Mac was adorable with Alexis. So at least we got some cuteness courtesy of the fire...

Divider

Carly's demented thirst for revenge on Dante and Lulu for being singlehandedly responsible for Michael's incarceration and being a blood traitor, respectively, led her to some uncomfortable places (like 123 Pimp Street). But now? With the knowledge that Dante and Brenda have a past? She's smug and just gleeful about it.

Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself. Before the smug glee came some Jason propping that prompted me to give an Olympic caliber eyeroll.

Carly: You know how long I've been friends with Jason? No one love Jason like I do. [...] These people are snakes, Spinelli, and your first instinct should be to protect Jason.
Spinelli: Yes, of course. I owe Stone Cold all that I am. 

VOM. IT.

Then she got confirmation of Dante's stint as Brenda's bodyguard and was so excited to break the news to Lulu that I actually giggled. I can't help it, I just adore Laura Wright and especially a Laura Wright who goes all out when it comes to playing the rotten side of Carly.

Carly: What has Dante told you about the time he guarded Brenda in 2007?
Lulu: I don't know what you're talking about.
Carly, in the most absurd "playing dumb" voice. OMG, it's a trap, Lulu, a trap!: Well, Brenda needed police protection on a visit to Manhattan in April of 2007 and Dante was assigned to her. Surely he mentioned this to you?

Well, the Brenda story is good for something. It's just that that something is making Carly enjoyable, which...this effing show, you know?

Like, this?

Jax: "The Divine One"? That's Spinelli's name for Brenda?
Long pause wherein Jax plainly thinks to himself, "Well, as far as ridiculous nicknames go, at least that one is accurate"
Carly: Couldn't you just hurl?

ENJOYABLE!

Divider

Speaking, as I was a minute ago, of Brenda: I actually could not watch any of the latest plan to ambush The Balkan's men in exchange for Siobhan. I just can't force myself to do it. It is so dumb, and repetitive, and boring, and filled with the unintentional hilarity of Jason and Dante playing sniper. If I missed anything worthwhile (let me pause for a second and laugh UPROARIOUSLY at that notion), please fill me in.

Divider

Sonny: Why is it so hard for you to believe that I have feelings for Claire?

Um...because she has zero redeeming qualities. Have feelings for her? I'm stunned that he can manage to be in the same room as her for extended periods of time.

The fact that GH has given me a Sonny relationship and I can't answer the question "Who's the worst half of this pairing" with complete certainty is all kinds of upsetting.

Comments

Given the horrible ratings last week-there should have been an announcement today about a new head writer and EP at GH!! What is the hold up? Nothing is going to change until Guza is gone!

this show sucks!!!!!! guza/phelps are from the devil

As someone who has watched this show since 1977 (but no longer watches), I remember this house as the Webber home. Rick, Lesley, Laura, Amy, Mikey, and Blackie all made there home there. Later, Ginny, Tony, Tania, Lucy, Colton, Decker and Charlene took up residency. This house is a HUGE part of GH history and Guza just burned it to the ground probably because it had no Sonny history. Guza (along with Jill Phelps) hate GH's great history and I pray someday someone fires them so we can salvage something decent from GH.

I guess no one saw Guza whizzing on Mac's house while it was on fire?

Well, then, that does it. I'm heading out to California today and demanding they replace Guza with ME. I'll resurrect Georgie- in a FAR less stupid way than all those other failed resurrections- AND Jason Quartermaine AND Laura. PLEASE, OH PLEASE, ABC, PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY!

Systematically, little by little, piece by piece, GH as it was loved by millions a decade or longer ago - is being dismantled. The showcased characters are not tied to true legacy families. The sets, from houses to the hospital, are being burned down, remodeled, or otherwise destroyed. I can sit through an entire episode, which is sort of like watching a multi-car pileup - you know you shouldn't, but you just can't stop - and simply not recognize anything. The characters passed soap-quality extravagant a long time ago and are now straight-on caricatures of some bizzare daytime video game or adult cartoon.

I can't imagine what the writers or producers are thinking or what they could possibly hope to achieve, but viewers aren't sticking around to watch it. When the end comes - and it isn't a matter of if it does, who is going to be left to care?

Sad, disrespectful, and completely unnecessary.

Nothing makes Carly enjoyable. Nada. Zip.Zilch.

One thing would, though. Her death. Preferably in as painful a way as possible.

FREE JAX.

Losing a set is symbolic. Losing veteran talent is far worse. Killing off Alan Quartermaine, Emily, and Georgie, and eliminating Laura, Robert Scorpio, Bobbie and a host of others, has left this show without its heart. How stupid can they be? I guess... pretty stupid.

Didn't they burn Kelly's down then rebuild it exactly the same? Ridiculous. I love the Scorpio/Jones history. They just HAD to kill it didn't they?

Is there way that Robin can wake up and all of this just be a bad dream?

And PLEASE make spinelli go away. Can't stand him anymore.

Wow. I totally forgot about it being the Webber home. They truly want to kill GH.

You should watch the bit of the Balkan ambush where Lucky and Brenda are fake struggling. They have a little conversation and it's actually kind of adorable. Well, it's adorable for about 1.5 seconds until you remember what a crap storyline this is for these two awesome legacy characters but still... those 1.5 seconds are pretty great.

The Scorpio house was one of the very few places left that still let you hold on to the good ol' days of GH. I suppose the Q mansion will be next and probably with the remaining Q's still in it. Maybe hit by a wrecking ball or buried under volcanic lava or disintegrate in some kind of mob-related bombing.

I still look at Johnny's penthouse and think it looks an awful lot like Robert Scorpio's old penthouse. Remember that place? I think everyone was there before Luke and Laura's wedding if I'm not mistaken.

If Guza reads this blog (and I often times envision that he does, giving a little Renfroe laugh that he's pissing off fans, which I think he gets off on), and NOW he knows I hold some kind of wistful memory of something on that show, it will definitely be a goner.

Guza sucks donkey balls.

So sad that Mac's home burned down. This show is a giant asshole. I detest you Guza. You ruined my show and crapped on everything that was good before it got into your nasty sweaty clamy hands. Peace bitch.

@Ginger

They'll bring out Bobbie for about 10 seconds at the holidays then that's it. You'll never see the Spencers gather around and talk about Ruby or anything that mattered. You'll hear Elizabeth talk about "Gram" when it's time to take her boys over there, but you'll never see Gram playing with the kids. It's like she's some mythical being who lives somewhere. We know that she's good and kind, and that's it.
It's only a matter time before they get rid of Tracy, Monica, and Edward. I only watch this show cause I still love Tracy and the Q's. What they did to Alan was a damn shame.

This show is like watching cartoon characters acting out shadows of who they used to be. GH has always been a little goofy but now it's just cartoonish with zero SL build up.

Guza is probably still mad at his mother for not letting him play with matches, because he just loves a big ol' fire, doesn't he? I bet he asked the crew to let him start the special effects that burned down the Scorpio house. My only hope is that they rebuild it the same way.

In what universe do COPS work with a MOB HITMAN to shoot to kill on sight? How ridiculous is this? I know it's a soap, but the situations are so far from any kind of reality, it's driving people away from this show in droves. Guza & Co. are a FAILURE with the declining ratings, why they still have jobs is anyone's guess.

Laura grew up in that house. My Laura grew-up-in-that-house.

That house is almost more important history-wise than the hospital:

-Laura and Scotty famously placed the star on top of that tree.

-Rick and Lesley, Amy, Blackie, then Ginny - all lived there.

-Lucy's famous red dress and hat wedding to Alan took place there.

-Like she said, Robin grew up there.

I HATE THIS SHOW!!!

Just one thing-while that whole Maxie talking about going into Georgie's room to feel close to her bit was sweet and adorable and probably the best thing on yesterday-wasn't it a plot point when Matt first came on that Mac cleaned out Georgie's room and rented it to Matt? Wasn't Maxie super-upset about this at the time? Now neither of them seems to remember that he lived in the house at all.

JB I was sitting there watching it going HEY MATT DID YOU FORGET YOU LIVED IN GEORGIE'S ROOM?!?!?!?! This show sucks.

They need to get RID of this crap. The 1.2's and 1.5's (funny how NOW 1.7's aren't considered CRAPPY anymore) PROVE that NONE of this crap is working. Jasam, Lucky with the boring, bad accent redhead, it's ALL bad. 2 years is long enough to 'try a reunion'. Bringing back JJ, then blowing LL2 to smithereens was another bait and switch that bit them in the ass.

GH is done. They can't fix it at this point. I'm waiting for the entire place to blow up. Of course, Jason will try to single handidly 'save everyone' everyone EXCEPT Jake of course :)

The show is no longer at all interesting. It is not exciting, it is not entertaining. Dull and boring, boring and dull. I'm not sure why I'm still watching. I don't care at all what happens.

Yes, so the Scorpio house (a symbol of good-in-its heyday GH) burns down. But guess what I read in the spoilers (hey, I said SPOILERS. Skip the rest of this if you don't want to know. Aw, heck. It's not like this show is unpredictable).

Anyway, Brenda and Sonny meet up in his old apartment...above the strip club? Where Luke's used to be? Yeah. Somehow THAT landmark survived...

This effing show.

This episode left me with two main thoughts:

1. The fact that the smoke detector could not be heard from inside the baby's bedroom (which you'd think would be, you know, a priority where smoke detectors are concerned) kind of implies that Mac's house wasn't up to snuff in terms of fire safety. I rather dislike this implication. Has a single character EVER been more obsessed with the safety and well-being of his family? I can't imagine he'd let his niece and the baby who is, for all intents and purposes his *granddaughter*, stay in a house that was anything other than ridiculously safe and secure? Especially considering part of the reason for them being there involves the aforementioned neice being stalked/terrorized by a psycho?

2. What I did enjoy, however, was Carly's attempt to justify her scheming in defiance of Jason as being in his best interest.

Carly: You know how trusting Jason can be.

Audience: ?????????

Spinelli: Actually, I've never known Stone Cold to...

Carly: ANYWAY...

Me: HA!

I'm so sad that Mac's house burned down. The Webber/Jones/Scorpio house is an essential set to me, like the hospital and Kelly's Diner. I was hoping that since Robin and Emma went to live with Mac that we would all get to see it more often. Now this. It's heartbreaking.

JB, like you, I noticed that Matt, Maxie and the GH writers) completely forgot that Matt was renting Georgie's room and living at the Scorpio house. What a glaring omission!

At least I should be grateful that Guza didn't use this fire as an opportunity to also kill off some Scorpios since that family is about as hated in PC as the Quartermaines. So...thank goodness for small favors...?

I, too, caught the discrepancy of Georgie's room still being in tact when it was cleared out so Matt could live there.

I can't think too much about this. All I know is that every trace of Georgie is now gone. It was like seeing her lifeless body on those steps before Christmas (!) all over again. I wish she were merely an offensive existence to the writing staff, instead of actually dead.

Guza totally gave us the finger burning down the Scorpio house.

As for Carly, there is nothing enjoyable about her....ever. She's merely going back to her vile roots. She is such a miserable heifer!

I am depressed, which means it must be the start of the holiday season in PC.

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