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« The Day's Most Accurate (And Charitable!) Dialogue | Main | Can I Ask ABC Daytime To Pay For My Therapy? »

November 14, 2010

Inappropriate Make-out Partners, Unite!

There was certainly a theme to Friday's episode, and it made me a little sad for the days when One Life to Live had clever episode titles.  The good old days.

Gigi and Cristian made out because they were both feeling dejected about their relationships and had consumed ridiculous amounts of champagne.


Kelly and Rex made out because Kelly planted one on him and then the two of them had a bizarre confrontation about who was to blame.  And Rex was made paranoid by thoughts of his girlfriend Gigi possibly spending the evening with some champagne-swilling dude in Paris on the West Bank (okay, good one, writers!).  And Kelly is still pining away over the love of her life, Joey Buchanan.  Or at least he's been the great love of her life since the show hired someone to play him.  Had she even mentioned him once since her return?


Starr and James made out because her babydaddy's final wish for her after going off to prison for having committed murder was that she get together with James.  (That's a real sentence!) 


And Starr, in her anguish, assumed he meant to get it on with James as soon as humanly possible.  By the way?  James summed up Starr's excellent life in spectacular fashion.  To wit:

James: Starr, listen to me, you are not ready for this, not right now.  Your life is a mess, okay?  You were just kidnapped twice.  Hope's babysitter was murdered.  Your daughter's life was threatened, Starr.  You watched me get buried alive and you almost killed yourself!  And now your boyfriend is being shipped off to prison for ten years.  Okay, you don't want to just start something new, that's not what you want.

Yeah, I mean when you put it like that, Starr should maybe wait a day or two until she hooks up with somebody else.  Maybe next week?  I mean you can hardly blame her for thinking she should move on right away, considering on what was essentially the worst day of her entire life her freaking father threw a party and didn't even stop by to throw a little support her way.  And every single one of her friends and family (other than her mother, of course) attended said party instead of staying with her.  Of course you can hardly blame Todd, either, for thinking he had every right to throw such a party since everyone did indeed accept his invitation happily and immediately -- everyone, including the victims of his various attempted murders and rapes, and ultimately his two-time rape victim!

Incidentally, it was refreshing to see Starr get to actually have some anger at Cole, who consistently makes illegal and dangerous choices and gets treated by half the town like he's some poor victim with no agency of his own.  He's a criminal with no impulse control and it was high time someone in his life noticed.  (Did anyone else think their relationship montage the other day was hilarious?  Virtually every clip was during one of his imprisonments, addictions, withdrawals, etc.)


In non-makeout storylines, John finally called Marty off of Natalie and Natalie finally decided to fight back.


Bring it on, ladies! 

Meanwhile, Ford got all up in Dorian's face, and he should thusly die

Oh yeah and Rex heard that Echo is his mother.  Eh.

Destiny out!


Someone help me out with this...please. I guess I missed something because didn't Mitch give his bone marrow to save Rex's son? Didn't the writers already prove that Mitch was his father? I admit that I don't watch OLTL everyday but I definitely saw that story play out. Do the writers plan on switching the bone marrow to Clint's? Tell me what I missed? Thanks.

Angie, if I recall correctly, Mitch just "happened" to be a match, but that was ultimately proven to just be a coincidence and he was not Rex's father.

Kelly is on her way back to a third helping of some Joey B? Why? How soon before she puts the moves on Clint, Bo, Matthew, C.J. and Shane? Sorry, bringing back Joey for Kelly is D.U.M.B. Kelly banged Duke and birthed his son Zane(nasty)!

Natalie. Go on with your bad self and stop letting Marty get in your face.

Starr and Cole. I had to admit the montage made me remember how sweet, innocent and violently wrong their early relationship was.

Starr and James. James is growing on me as the #1 Ford brother. The actor that plays Nate is way TOO old to be with Dani. He's a little creepy for my taste.

Cris/Gig - Ugh. Gigi can stay in Paris.

Kelly/Rexx - Um...Now that he's a Buchanan she'll be looking for first dibs to break him in.

Honestly, having just started back watching the show...I truly have been enjoying OLTL lately. I only saw half of Friday's eppy and I haven't caught up on the DVR yet to that day but I'm excited that a) Kim Zimmer (Echo) will be John Paul Lavasseiur (Rex's) mom. That's the story I'll be looking for. Also, I think Gigi and Christian are hot together and Kelly honestly being played by Gina Tognioni is hot with pretty much any guy. Now the Starr situation...well I think I could stomach it a little better if she were just say...5 or 6 years older than she is but she's not so...

Alikat, why should Starr suddenly be older? It's not as though she hasn't been living the life of 24 year old Springer guest for the last 4 years. And it can't be James' age, because I'm pretty sure Nic Roebuck is (and acts) younger than Brandon Buddy.

Gigi and Cris were just awkward and gross. Am I supposed to believe Cris would be thisclose to sleeping with Gigi, b/c Layla had to cancel their time together to work? Seriously??? He also called Gigi...sexy, which is just......I can't even...FF should not play drunk ever again.

Kelly is still a dud. The only time I can tolerate her is when she's with her family.

I'm glad at least one person in the family stayed home with Starr and was actually there for her, instead of at some unnecessary party.

I'm loving Echo/Clint/Viki/Charlie and yet still don't give a flying fig about Rex and this is his story. Ha!

I'm still loving Crazy/Vengeful Marty!

Kelly is like the one character I hate more than John. She adds absolutely nothing to this show and I am not looking forward to NuJoey seeing as he'll be paired with her. I much prefer Adriana to her.

Starr & Cole never did anything for me so I'm glad that's over. I like James and hope he can breathe new life into Starr.

Marty didn't go to the party for any other reason than to piss Natalie off. Not sure why she bothered to listen to John but it was fun to watch while it lasted. Natalie is not match for her as far as I'm concerned. She's too much of a coward.

I want to like Gigi and Cris (not together though) but they are always given such crap stories. Poor David Fumero hasn't had a decent story for years.

OLTL cast is getting way TOO big. They need to send Gigi, Cris, Kelly, Inez, and Nate packing. I like Cris, but we only see Carlotta three times a year and he doesn't have his own wife or children.

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