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« On Rivals and Romance and Repeated Repetition | Main | AMC In 30 Seconds »

December 13, 2010

Reasons To Call The Cops (And Other Things That Mystify)

Today was a tough one.  I usually skip yelling at the screen because it just hurts, but I couldn't help it this time.  While we had one scenario in which a bunch of (completely idiotic) people were blown away and full of righteous indignation that if you punch someone and he pushes back, you are not a victim who can press charges while you walk away scot-free... we had another scenario in which a woman had been abducted, tied up, taunted, and nearly raped, BUT NO ONE CALLED THE MOTHERTRUCKING POLICE.  This is not the sort of situation that 911 is for??  Why, because Nora had wonderful, protective Rex with her to save the day? No worries about catching the dude who did it by, I don't know, sending some uniforms to the motel room?

These last few episodes have truly been bizarre.  I really struggle to find words to explain what went on at that boxing gym and who in the world we were supposed to be rooting for.  From what I gather (if you really want to track it, which you probably don't), the Fords made a deal wherein Bobby would box Eddie and if Bobby won, Eddie would leave town (I didn't catch if there was a "prize" if Eddie were to win). Eddie's an expert boxer and a violent maniac, but not only did the gaggle of morons think they could help Bobby learn to box in one day, they also thought there was some chance Eddie would follow through on his end of the bargain were he to lose.  They brought in Cris, who dislikes Ford, to help him out. Cris helped because... he didn't like Eddie pushing James around. Then they brought in Brody, who loathes Ford with the burning fire of a thousand suns.  Brody helped because... I have no freaking idea.  Because it gave us shirtless Brody scenes (I am not complaining)?  Both Cris and Brody got in a few punches (yay!) and it shocked the gaggle of dimwits and made them very nervous, but also made Langston very horny.

With me so far? Langston tried to talk Ford into bowing out of the fight by offering him a roll in the hay, and since Our Hero Ford is such an honorable dude, this made him love Langston so much that he couldn't possibly bang her.  Starr, Nate, and Dani stood around being some sort of awkward Greek chorus of jackasses, and then Eddie came back and everyone yelled at each other a lot.  I still don't understand what I was watching because it did not make a lick of sense.  Then Ford punched Eddie, who punched him back?  And pushed him, and then proceeded to take him down with a hilarious head butt. This made the jackassery contingent very unhappy and shrieky, and made James reach for a gun a few times with a weepy face.  Awkwardly.  And really, this is the key word.  AWKWARDLY.  The plotting was inorganic, the reactions were inorganic, the.... did all of this really happen?

PoorWiddleFordie

"Poor Ford!"  Or something.


Thegangsavestheday

They all acted incredibly shocked that Eddie would be so violent -- even though his violence is the thing they're all allegedly trying to get away from, and even though they invited him to fight.  And stood around taunting him.  If Brody hadn't been there, I'm pretty sure every one of these people would've had the crap beaten out of them since time and time again, something violent would happen and they would be surprised and upset and then turn around and deal with it by smugly taunting the violent dude again.  For that reason alone, I do wish Brody hadn't been there.

Anyway, Clint has sunk to new lows, Eddie's been shot dead, Matthew is awesome, Natalie and John had one of the least romantic engagements possible, Matthew and Nora and Rex have apparently been in a car wreck with one another, and (oh yeah) both Bo and Nora nearly got raped by a divorced couple.  

I'm a bit cranky today, yes, but seriously: what the hell is going on?

Destiny out.

Comments

Yeah, I'm like...fer cryin' out loud...call the COPS already! Maybe THEY could get a message to the police commish...'cept of course he was hallucinating on SLEEPING PILLS at the time....but they do have other officers with guns and badges and things like that, right?

And the stupid boxing 3 Fordstooges and the shrieky teens....wow, they move really fast..oh wait that's because I always have them on FF. Always.

Glad the old Ford daddy will finally be gone...

Why wouldn't Inez confide in BO that Clint is blackmailing her....oh how I HATE stupid characters (and lazy stupid writers. sigh.)

Hey Matthew...Clint always tells you the truth? Ummm didn't you just nail him on the whole Rex as your son thing?

Nat...John...you two break my heart....

One bright spot lately...no Tawd & Tea.

Oh Show...you can be so good...and then you can turn around and be so....awful.

I wanted to marry John and Natalie's proposal and have its babies. Would that make me their parents?! I loved it more than I love chocolate. Very unusual and very, very real at the same time. It made me misty.

PodMatthew disturbs me. I want the real one back!

Technically, Nora and Rex did call the police. The police was just drugged on a boring lady's sofa. Err...

I'm definitely never going to marry a police commissioner now that I know the rule is if you married him and his phone goes to voicemail, 911 is not available to you! (So take THAT, commissioners of the world!)

the show is a true embarassment. The boxing scenes? unbelievable with the Ford trio and their ridiculous panting twitty girlfriends. Langston needs to just leave. What a travesty. Ruined completely, from a fiesty unique strong teen to utter complete whining trash. All to "redeem" Ford who has lost all his edge. At least as a pervert, he was a decent character to hate. Now, he's beyond boring and pathetic. TPTB should drop their heads in shame for writing this cramp.

Matthew, on the other hand, works because he's played by the awesome EA. Even if I don't like him right now, he's interesting.

OK so the Ford family do not give Emmy worthy performances. But I'm gonna be an optimist and say that at least they are new central characters which has given us some new stories. Unlike GH which has had the same exact 10 characters in the exact same stories and the exact same dialogue for at about a decade. Also OLTL does not shove two of the most hated characters on daytime down out throats every day in every scene (they rhyme with Money and Splenda). Plus there are only 3 of them in a cast of about 20 or so other top performers. And several other ongoing and intertwining stories. And well at the very least it's no HS musical rip off. To me, it's just not the travesty people seem to think. Besides, who of us doesn't enjoy watching Ford get the snot beat out of him?

As far as calling the police, I'm not sure why people are arguing for doing the rational. Did you forget you're watching a soap? The same soap opera that gave us Eterna?

I have enjoyed watching Matthew. He is a teenager who has gone through a lot of trial and tribulations the same as any other so his "transformation" of sorts isn't all that unexpected for a teenager. At best he's become moody and perhaps rebellious. Matthew is 16. I'd be worried if he were anything else. Eddie Alderson is a great actor and he sold his scenes in the car as he anguished over his "perfect" father cheating on his mother.

Natalie was acting like a twit after John proposed to her, running out to talk to Rex and pacing back and forth having her usual Natalie anxiety attack because of the same old predicament she always finds herself in. And John is always so monotone and couldn't show an ounce of emotion if his life depended on it.

I dunno I thought OLTL set up a great murder mystery for once in a long time w/the added bonus of a car wreck. All on a Monday. This show has had a lot of issues in the recent past but I think it's improved quite a bit, even with the Fords. It's ratings have gone up, they have been advertising more and there seems to be a new resurgence of talent and writing. That's just me though. The optimist.

"And several other ongoing and intertwining stories."

I count exactly one ongoing story without a Ford in it and that's the Echo/Viki/Charlie storyline. And perhaps Destiny's storyline although I dunno if that really counts as an ongoing storyline since it's been ignored for weeks on end. Besides that?

I think the straw that broke the camel's back for me was Ford having a tie to Aubrey. Seriously, why does have to be part of that story too?!?!

Ford is the new "Dante" on OLTL. He has to be tied to all of the stories since someone at ABC has told the writers to push the actor down our throats.

OLTL has been very good the last few months. Nothing is perfect and I'm enjoying the vets and seeing a variety of characters each week. Destiny's story needs to be ramped up and Shaun needs his own story.

Jolie 2.0 - McBore is so boring. I really hope that Brody is Natty's baby Daddy.

EA has been kicking it as sixteen year old Matthew and I'm loving his story.

Langston used to be one of my favorite teens, but since she peeked under Ford's trunks, she's been a complete twit.

Bo/Nora/Inez - Poor Bora! Inez is dumber than a box of hair! All she had to do was tell Bo about Clint's dastardly deeds and he would have put a stop to it!

Yeah! Rex is unconscious from the car wreck. OLTL fans all over the world are spared from his mugging until he regains consciousness.

The boxing scenes? Hey, at least Cris and Brody got to punch on Ford. Cris was smart enough to have had enough of the entire crew and took off.

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