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« Married To The Mob | Main | New Twists Bring New Problems (or New Jack City) »

February 21, 2011

Greek Chorus In Fuschia Lipstick

Seems that yet again Tess was somehow the voice of reason on today's One Life to Live. Okay, "reason" is an overstatement, as there's clearly nothing reasonable about wanting to marry Ford, even if it's just for some sort of not-very-well-thought-out payout. However, her complete and total disdain for him on every level continues to be a delight.

Tess

"You're not my type. Do you really think this lumpy, waxed body is something that would turn me on? Put your shirt on before I lose my breakfast."

About Clint: "Enough to forget about the fact that you practically raped his daughter when she was helpless?? If you think he's gonna let you anywhere near his grandchild, think again."

"And then Clint's team of lawyers are gonna say how you slept with Jessica when she thought she was in high school. You're gonna look like a pedophile. And then he's gonna trot in every woman you've ever used and thrown away. By the time he's done, you'll never see your son again. Hell, you probably won't be allowed near schools!"

It was a good day.

Ford manhandling Tess ("for Jess's own good" or some such bullshit) is making me blow a gasket, though. If we're supposed to be impressed by his attempts at making sure Tess doesn't damage Jessica's body, they are barking up the wrong tree. He comes off as controlling and abusive, nothing else.

Today had the best Natalie and John scenes I have ever seen. I know, I'm exaggerating again, but I thought both Michael Easton and Melissa Archer were on fire -- and yes, I've just paid my very first compliment to Michael Easton. You read it right. John was literally spitting mad, which was fabulous.

John

And Nat was workin' real hard to have a leg to stand on, but remained peg-legged (though I'm glad she got to point out that she and John weren't together when she and Brody hooked up but... John could quite easily argue that he broke up with Natalie before sleeping with Kelly, which he did, and for some reason I kind of love that Natalie doesn't see it that way at all). And it's somehow weirdly refreshing that someone got busted after a one-night stand is just basically all, "Yeah, I did it. So?"

The trio

Oops.

I love that Rex is now allegedly going to tell Bo about Clint's role in David's Moroccan imprisonment as if this will somehow properly get back at Clint. Oh that Rex, he's such a good man! He'd let Bo's son languish in prison in exchange for Gigi's tuition, but not anymore now that it turns out Clint is extra mean.

Rexclint

The fact that Rex hasn't revealed this information thus far speaks volumes about the kind of man he is, so I'm a little exhausted of hearing about what a "man of character" Rex has become.

Also, Starr continued to be an idiot. The first thing she asks Langston about in the morning is how her big Valentine's Day date went, knowing full well that Ford found out the night prior that he has offspring? I guess it should be no shock that she thinks news like that might just make someone no more than late for a date, considering her prom date managed to show up at prom while he was imprisoned. But then they gave her a little bit of brain back by letting her remember that Tess might be at play which, okay, Starr has been a victim of Tess so it works for me. But folks on canvas knowing that Tess is out but not knowing where she is is not particularly indicative that we're going to get to the end of this anytime soon.

Divider

Checking in with my usual "other works" report: I saw Kim Zimmer (Echo) in a play on Saturday night. I've really only ever seen her on OLTL and the various Guiding Light clips over the years, and she's terrific at the old-school soap style but I wasn't sure what to expect. It's a low-key play with a rotating cast, but it's a lot of fun and has some strong, heartfelt moments. Zimmer really was one of the standouts; she was extremely generous to her castmates and handled the whole thing like a pro. It made me hope she gets to play more scenes on the show as grandmother to Shane and not just meddling interloper (inexplicably obsessed with Charlie).

Comments

As much as I was against Tess re-emerging, she has turned out to be quite entertaining with all her Ford-bashing. I am confused why she seems not to care about the kids though, because I thought Tess at least loved Bree since she is Nash's. Then again, she did leave her with Todd while she tried to blow up Natalie, so maybe she doesn't. As for the marriage, I think she wants to do it so that he would be Jessica's next-of-kin and the only person that could commit her to St. Ann's. Otherwise, her parents would commit her to try to get Jessica back as soon as they found her.

As for Ford, this whole "I'm not abandoning another kid to a bastard" argument is getting old. Even if Clint has gotten all controlling, he doesn't steal cars and beat women and children, just rapists. Also, James had already come back to town with his beaten child sob story when Ford first found out about the possibility of having a kid, and he certainly didn't care about abandoning his kid then, so this unexplained 180 is annoying.

And Ford is an idiot if he thinks he's ever going to see a dime of that trust fund. Since Clint knew he was Ryder's biological father, I'm sure he named Brody specifically as the trustee. Of course, the show wants us to believe that he doesn't care about the money and it all belongs to the baby, but if he is letting a mentally ill woman go untreated and not inform her family that she is Tess, then he absolutely would take that money.

good show today ford and mad tess is ok but a sane jessica is wrong

"As for the marriage, I think she wants to do it so that he would be Jessica's next-of-kin and the only person that could commit her to St. Ann's. Otherwise, her parents would commit her to try to get Jessica back as soon as they found her."

In the real world that wouldn't work because legally Tess doesn't exist and can't get married. She & Ford could go through the ceremony, but as soon as her family found her all they'd need to do is provide evidence that Tess is out again and the whole thing would be null & void. Then they could use the wannabe marriage as proof that Messica needed to be sent back to St Ann's (because seriously, no one in her right mind would marry that douchebag).

Of course, when it comes to Jess' issues OLTL is pretty much 180 degrees away from the real world, so that's probably exactly where this storyline is going.

Loved todays episode. I laughed out loud a few times: 1) Dorian vs. Echo 2) Tess and Ford (lots of LOLs there courtesy of Tess) and 3) Dorian reacting to Kelly

Somebody shoot me because I'm actually enjoying Tess and Ford?!?!? I'm just going to have to deconstruct Ford and force myself he is a different person. From this point on, Ford is just a dumb horny idiot that has made some stupid mistakes. I'm going to accept it and enjoy the ride (or try to atleast). I don't think I'll ever root for the guy, but atleast I'll be able to better laugh at him like I was doing today.

I loved John and Natalie today. Stop the Presses, is it me or was Michael Easton actually acting today???

I hope Echo stays...

@E.O.---I think we're all supposed to take that attitude toward Ford, because my guess/fear is that they're trying to set up a rerun of T/Jess's history with Ford in the roll of Nash and Brody as Antonio.

""Hell, you probably won't be allowed near schools!""

Definitely the line of the day. I'm still very concerned that they're trying going for a Tess/Nash redux (particularly since we know Lang's days in Llanview are almost over), but I'm glad that someone, even if it's Tess, is calling Ford out on what a slimeball he is.

Plus, Roxy!

Tess/Nash. Ugh. I hated that OLTL fired Forbes Nash, because he was smoking hot!

Rexx is a wiener and will always be a wiener.

Tess was hilarious as she messed with Fordified's head.

I would never invite Kelly to a bachelorette party because she will sleep wit the groom as soon as she can.

Echo only wants to stick it to Viki by being with Charlie. If Viki was still married to Clint she would do the same song and dance.

I had reservations about Tess too though I did enjoy her today seeing as she is constantly trashing him and calling him for what he is: a rapist and a pedophile. I really hope that if they do get married it will be all for naught w/the reason being that Tess is a part of Jessica's mental illness. But yeah, OLTL is not always known for doing the logical and reasonable thing. And Ford better never have anything to do w/Ryder. Ever.

I also liked John's scenes w/Natalie. He is still not my favorite character but he did express appropriate emotion towards Natalie so it was enjoyable. Someone send Natalie a dime and tell her to buy a clue already. It's only been one day since her lies have been revealed and she thinks she has the right to yell at Kelly (who I normally dislike also but actually felt bad for today) and expect John to come running back to her and play pretend family?

I actually liked Rex's scenes w/Clint. I realize he has kept David's imprisonment a secret so he is still capable of being stupid but I thought he at least went toe to toe w/Clint instead of playing the blathering idiot which is a nice change of pace. There really is no reason for him to keep David a secret anymore so if he doesn't tell Bo right away then he gets put right back on my s*** list.

I'd like to see David back anyway since as much as I love Robin Strasser and every scene she's in I think it's time for Dorian to stop meddling in other people's lives and get her own story. Plus it's not like Tuc Watkins does much on Desperate Housewives anyway so I don't see why he won't just commit to OLTL.

"And it's somehow weirdly refreshing that someone got busted after a one-night stand is just basically all, "Yeah, I did it. So?""

Doesn't this happen all the time on OLTL?

Todd slept with Blair while he was supposedly in love with Tea, and he didn't care.

Rex slept with Stacy while he was supposedly in love with Gigi, and he didn't care. He told Gigi it was all her fault.

John is just the latest pig to use and discard women, and the show tells us this makes him a real man.

True, Todd's attitude toward basically everything he does in life is, "So?" so it's not particularly refreshing when he does it. But Rex slept with Stacey because he thought he and Gigi were over for good and that she'd been cheating on him (not because he jumped to conclusions but because she told him so), so while I'm loathe to defend douchey Rex, I thought it made all the sense in the world at the time. (Also, didn't he lie about it for a while, too?)

I just liked that no one was trying to talk their way out of anything that can't be undone, and that they did on purpose.

"(Also, didn't he lie about it for a while, too?)"

Yup...after Rex and Gigi got back together, Rex neglected to mention to Gigi that he and Stacy had slept together. I think it came out a few weeks later when Stacy announced she was pregnant.

That's our Rex...a real standup guy.

I'll give NuJack his "first day" benefit of the doubt and see how all this plays out before getting too Judgy McJudgerson. He was a bit hammy though and was....well much different than the old Jack in a lot of ways. It seems obvious they only recast him to make him taller than Shane. I"m not really sure what their plan is though my wishful thinking is that it would be for Jack to come around and realize he's been raised by the biggest bully in town and change his ways w/Blair's help. 'Cause it certainly won't be about Todd changing his ways as a person or a parent. That train left the station many a year ago.

I am still enjoying Tess bossing Ford around like the human bobble head he truly is and insulting him every other sentence.

Loved Vicki and Clint too. Hell hath no fury like a scorned Viki Banks. Which makes me worried what will happen to Charlie once she finds out about him and Echo.

It was nice to see Matthew come out of the woodwork after practically a month (which Destiny reminded us was actually only a couple days ago in soap time). His kiss w/Destiny is actually one story I hope they'll drop since it's not anything of interest and EA needs better material, no offense to Shenell Edmonds. Hopefully we will see more of him and his reaction to the fallout though seeing as he has no problem with Clint's lies maybe we'll eventually get to see him play a little Grand Moff Tarkin to Clint's Darth Vader.

Tess can keep insulting Ford-the-pig, woot, but I'm getting tired of the whole story. Add to it the possibility of tptb putting them together, and not throwing him out on his ass (where he belongs) and I'm just....TIRED. I hope they have a plan, and that it involves Ford's exit.

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