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« If I'm This Easy To Please, Why Do They Please Me So Rarely? | Main | Say What Now? »

April 10, 2011

Lennie Briscoe Would Not Stand For This!

I know that murder investigations in Pine Valley are so common that they've lost their mystique and have taken on sort of a casual air, but seriously, I feel like the police should be conducting their conversations with murder suspects in interrogation rooms, not in the middle of the police station joined by a group of pals!

Are we solving a murder mystery or trying to come to an agreement on where to order takeout? Somewhere, S. Epatha Merkerson (if she took her Law & Order role even half as seriously as I did) is shaking her head in disgust and she doesn't know why.

I especially like how Griffin could just have private chats with everyone.

"Oh, you and Kendall need to talk? Okay. Here, we'll turn our backs and give you some privacy".

Shoddy police work, PVPD! Not that this is breaking news or anything, since every investigation this police force conducts can be described as hopelessly inept, but still!

Oh, they also just let a random reverend hang out at the crime scene. Oh, sure, they objected for a whole half a second, but then shrugged their shoulders as if to say, "Can you add a line about taking back the contamination of this evidence when you're done with your prayer, Rev?"

And they didn't even notice how glaringly EVIL said reverend was, but more on that in a minute.

I guess I should back up: Griffin, like every person who has ever stepped foot in Pine Valley, is suspected of murder.

GriffinSpecifically, the murder of the evil Diana, who was killed by the equally evil Ricky, who did a pretty impressive job of framing Griffin. Corpse 
Although, considering the police force he's dealing with, maybe it's not so impressive after all.

(And speaking of unimpressive and also stupid, did Griffin seriously perform CPR while Diana was in bed? Isn't that, like, totally verboten?)

When Griffin got back to his room and discovered dead Diana, he was...more irked than anything.

Griffin: What the hell? Hey, what are you doing here? Hey! Oh, you gotta be kidding me. It's ridiculous.

Not to live down to stereotypes or anything, but if I found a dead body anywhere, let alone in my bed, I'd be doing a lot more screaming and a lot less scolding!

The cops brought him in for questioning after finding him with the body and also rifling through her purse, and eventually, the truth about his investigation into Zach's death started to come out and Kendall was PISSED.

Griffin: Kendall, I was trying to protect you.
Kendall: That's not your job. He was my husband. I had a right to know.

Almost as pissed as I am that SHE wasn't the one taking the lead in investigating Zach's death! Because why would she do that? He was only her husband!

Oh, and the police also found $75,000 cash, two plane tickets for Griff and Diana and a whole lot of stolen drugs in Griffin's room, so it's not looking so good for the good doctor right now. Depending on how much care the writers put into this story, it could be weeks before he is vindicated!


Part of me wants to give Ricky grudging props for doing such a good job (although, again, with the obvious caveat that, as noted above, it doesn't take much when it comes to the PVPD), but the other part is like, "Ricky, you are TERRIBLE at criminal master-minding!"

This was his face when Ryan and Kendall found out that Griffin was being taken to the police station:

He looks, as they say (and by "they", I mean "me and a handful of senior citizens who cling to phrases of yore"), pleased as punch and only a few seconds away from letting out a Mr. Burns style "Excellent". "What's excellent?," Ryan would wonder, confused as hell (his default facial expression).

"I just love it when a plan comes together." "God's plan?" "...yes." "I don't remember coming up with a plan for Griffin getting arrested, but okay".

Then he strolled onto the crime scene, ostensibly to say a prayer for the poor anonymous murder victim, which is problematic for a couple of reasons. First, he referred to Griffin as "my friend Griffin Castillo", which could raise a few eyebrows, since everyone, including Angie, can pick up on the glares of loathing Griffin and Ricky exchange whenever they are in each other's company. The police probably wouldn't know about their mutual hatred, but why chance it? And why chance visiting the body of your evil partner in crime who you were spotted around town canoodling with?! Anyone, including the CSI techs, could have seen Diana caressing him lovingly at ConFusion whilst wearing the corpses of a family of birds she slaughtered in order to craft a 70's inflected vest.

THEN! He went to Krystal's for whiskey to celebrate and dramatically monologued to his whiskey.

Like, at full volume! To the point where I'm surprised a patron at another table didn't say, "Sorry for your loss--who's Diana? Is she the evil chick you're always hanging out with? Strange company for a minister to keep, but anyway, can you use your inside voice?"


On a completely different note, I reserve the right to take this back as soon as she becomes annoying--which, considering the show that we are watching, could be as early as 1:03 on Monday--but I am really intrigued by Maya so far.

 MayaIt helps that they're giving her the perfect amount of screentime and that she's played by an actress who seems to be really talented. Talking to her baby could have been amazingly cheesy, but I thought she pulled it off (although I admit that I did expect her to start singing "Somewhere Out There"). She's only had a handful of scenes so far, but she's WAY more interesting than Marissa has ever been.


It seems like everyones brains are missing since they fail to notice those looks that Reverend Dimples gives. I can't call him Ricky since I did love this guy on Port Charles where weirdly enough he was Ricky. But it did amuse me when he had a drink to celebrate. Are men of the cloth even allowed to drink?

I'm curious about Maya too. I did feel bad for the poor girl when she went to the Chandler mansion and that mean chick was just horrible to her.

But strangely enough I think Moose oops I mean Marissa might be growing on me or maybe I'm getting a rash. At least her hair is better sometimes since those things on the sides of her head look like wings. I expect her to fly off any day now.

First of all, why on earth was Griffin arrested for murder without giving him time to remove his shirt? And if arresting cops messed up in that regard, why didn't they allow him to take his shirt off at the station, do a long close-up of his chest? How could they have screwed this up so badly??? Since when do they film an entire episode of AMC without Griffin appearing shirtless?? I don't know how they missed that particular Frons memo.

Also,why is Jesse messing up so badly in his capacity as Chief of Police? He's making independent decisions, chiding Tad for working cases without informing him, and most unbelievable of all, Ryan is RIGHT THERE and Jesse isn't asking his advice, or getting his orders from him? Jesse is really off his game, to not be following the Pine Valley chain of command. It is very clear, and Ryan is at the top. Jeesh, this sort of thing just throw everything off.

Third - and, admittedly, a small item, but what religion exactly does Rev. Ricky the Hitman espouse? What denomination is his congregation? We know he's not Catholic, so why did he make the sign of the cross when he was blessing the body of the woman he murdered? I guess the investigative team is just there to clean up, since they didn't seem at all interested as to why this guy would show up at a room wiht a murder victim in it.

"Moose"?? LOL! I won't be able to see Marissa any other way. She's like Babe #2 - quite the clomper. Perhaps if JR takes her clog-dancing, he'll win his way back into her heart - small and smug as it is.

Third - and, admittedly, a small item, but what religion exactly does Rev. Ricky the Hitman espouse? What denomination is his congregation? We know he's not Catholic, so why did he make the sign of the cross when he was blessing the body of the woman he murdered?

I assume he's supposed to be Episcopalian. Which should make Episcopalians everywhere very annoyed, but that's AMC for you.

The only thing missing from that Ricky screencap is Mr. Burns' tented fingers. They've already gone so far over the top with Evil Ricky, they might as well go camp.

Don't worry, Louise! Lorraine Broderick will be the new head writer of this show again very soon, and will fix what's wrong with this troubled show once and for all!!!!

I meant Mallory, not Louise!!!

There's sure an awful lot for one person to fix, isn't there?

"And speaking of unimpressive and also stupid, did Griffin seriously perform CPR while Diana was in bed? Isn't that, like, totally verboten?"

Sad but true fact? The dr that is charged with Michael Jackson's murder tried to do CPR while Michael was in bed. Didn't move him to the floor for stability... So basically what I am saying here is Griffin killed this Diana chick AND the King of Pop.

Mallory, I LOVE your Law & Order references. Lennie Briscoe would NOT stand for such shenanagins! :)

As Mr. Burns would say, "Excellent!" Your recap was right on the money. It's all such terrible writing, especially making Kendall a sideline player in her own story. Lorraine Broderick has ALOT to clean up here. I wish her well.

Rev. Ricky the Hitman (LOL) when he entered Griff's room and ask that he could say a prayer for "her," I questioned how did he know the corpse was a she?

Please nominate this title in the Best of Awards at the end of the year.

OMG!! Bravo AMC . . . now you have TWO actors that have a complete BLANK STARE!! And yeah, maybe I'll tune in on the day when you have Griffin perform surgery w/o his shirt on!! "rolls eyes"!!

Or how about I'll come back when you get Thorsten Kaye back!!

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