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« Did You Bring It? | Main | Crossing The Line and the Un-apocalypse »

May 24, 2011

With Whom May I Register A Complaint?

Oof.

I mean, seriously, this episode started out trying to make me burst into tears by having Blair "rehearsing" the old Peabo Bryson One Life to Live theme song and getting choked up on the line "there's always tomorrow" and saying it was too sad. BECAUSE THERE IS NO LONGER ALWAYS TOMORROW. Ouch. Okay, so they got me. And I do have to say that it's nice to know we are officially seeing the post-cancellation episodes now; that's clear. Wait, that didn't come out right. There's nothing nice about the cancellation. It's just that there's been so much speculation on whether what we're seeing was taped before or after April 14th, so from here on out we have free reign to say, "Wha? They're doing this when they know the end is near?!"

Because... wha? They're doing this when they know the end is near?! And by "this," I of course mean this:

Ford1

Aww. Look! Ford volunteers in the children's wing of the hospital and he goes there all the time and the kids just love him. And he wears his big hot dog costume because it's so charming and adorable. You've got to be fucking kidding me. He volunteers with sick children! Does he take bullets for puppies, too? Drive for Meals-on-Wheels? Did he do a Peace Corps stint while we weren't looking? You know, it actually is possible to be a father who actually does love his child without having to turn into a saint. I'd accept that he's a player who's trying to not be such a dick anymore and who actually does want to be a good father if they told that story with any sort of reasonable pacing and actually bothered with the necessary steps (though I'd likely find it impossible to ever warm up to the actor as he just plain does nothing for me). But none of that has happened. It was an overnight turnaround and now they are laying it on so ridiculously thick that it's no longer funny. It seriously makes my skin crawl -- mostly because I'm embarrassed for the show. 

Ford: I guess I've never treated women right. When I was first with my ex, she was fragile and I took advantage of that. Got her pregnant... I guess I don't have much of a defense. I was a jerk for a long time. But I am trying to change. 

Gag me with a freaking machete. Also, his "ex" is a symptom of a disorder and not a person and he was never with her. As far as Jess is concerned, well, we all know that he sexually violated her, so it's just darling to listen to him feel bad about it as if what he did to her was no worse than what he did to Langston. And are we supposed to somehow be charmed that his "game" with women isn't good anymore and that he can just so adorably and sheepishly admit it? (And I'm not going to even get into the fact that his most recent actions against Jessica -- deliberately keeping the mother of his child [who is in danger when exposed to Tess or any other alter, make no mistake] from getting the psychiatric care she so desperately needs because his own personal and financial gain was more important -- are remaining totally and utterly unaddressed by anyone on the show and are conveniently absent from Ford's recent alleged self-awareness and self-recrimination for past deeds.)

Also embarrassing for the show is the never-ending D.I.D. nonsense. Today gave us the return of Bess. I know that the show changes the rules of D.I.D. based on the day's plot point, but apparently they continue to expect me to believe that not only is there always a ponytail holder and a spare set of glasses available every single time Bess emerges, but her eyes magically adjust to someone else's glasses prescription!

Bess1
Bess2

That Bess, she's amazing! I guess in some way it was a relief that Bess came out because she actually does have practical interest in doing right by Jessica and Brody did get to appeal to her today by mentioning Jessica's children (plural!), but it lasted all of four minutes and Tess came right back out. Aren't we so lucky? Now she and Ford can move forward with their delightfully appalling "love story." 

Viki and Clint and Bo and Nora and Matthew and Todd(?) and Blair and Starr were all perfectly lovely today and I'm actually usually pretty good at compartmentalizing these storylines and being able to enjoy the good ones even when they're on episodes with horrible ones but today's crap with Robert Ford was just so gross that it was hard to sit on this couch without wondering why I didn't have a bucket nearby. Dammit. And go figure, since that damn bucket was what started this whole Ford torture chamber to begin with.

I need a slightly over-full glass of wine. Or two.

Destiny out!

Comments

I say kill Ford and give his heart to Clint. We already know that's what they're going to do since Clint will never actually die. I'm not opposed to this; I just wish he'd pay for his crimes for a change.

It worries me that they'll kill Matthew instead (God I miss Sam. He was so much more fun than Bo) and that will be two dead kids (since I'm counting Jake from GH) who have to give up their organs for nothing more than a plot point and a more popular character. Give me a break.

Jess, Bess, Tess, and Wess bore me from day to day. And I'd have to have been watching at the time to give a damn about Ford. Honestly, Jessica bores me to tears and I haven't liked her since after Nate's funeral (I loved her tell-all of Natalie in that).

I like Cutter more than Ford for one reason and one reason only - he's leaving the show, and soon from what I've read.

Fudd, on the other hand, will remain for the present, stinking up our screens, one of the most odious characters EVER, and now he's to be "redeemed", apparently. I wish OLTL would do a crossover with AMC and have Fudd and Ryass both die when they full-length mirror they both gaze into adoringly fell on them, crushing them like the bugs they are.

And as for his feeling bad about what he did to Jessica, he couldn't even care that feeling all the way through his scene. By the time she was mentioned again, he was already dissing her and downplaying his own rapist behavior.

The Fudds have been a disaster all around, but Robert Fudd is a pimple on the ass of sick storytelling.

Matthew's good-bye to his parents before they wheeled him into the operating room bodes ill for his survival. I hope they don't kill either him or Shane, who also has the same blood type as Clint, to give him a heart. Too many dead young people on ABC daytime recently.

Viki and Clint can't commit Jessica themselves because she is married to whoever. Only her husband can commit her according to the ridiculousness of this show. That is why Clint is doing what he is doing with Cutter. Tess knew they would try to commit her which is why she married Ford.

Bueller?

ITA. Ford is beyond disgusting. I don't care if saves 100 orphans from a burning orphanage, he's still going to be a vile human being. He's never ever going to admit that he raped Jessica and that he's been abusing her ever since then. I hate him and I want him gone. However, I've heard rumors that the writers are planning to have him stay on the show until the end and start a romance with Jessica. I don't know if it's true, but I'm done with this show if it happens. The fact that Brody, the man who loves her and is still standing by her, would get tossed to the side for the rapist is disgusting and the writers should be ashamed of themselves for the message they're sending out to women everywhere.

You may or may not be happy to know that the hotdog-reading-to-sick-kids scenes were taped before the cancellation was announced. (I only know this from something I read on one of those social network places where people blab their personal business to the world.

Knope, thanks for the info! I actually assumed that it was a (way) pre-cancellation script but a post-cancellation taping with that Blair bit at the beginning thrown in last-second, but that's good to know that we're still not completely in post-4/14 tapings. I'm dying to see what happens with the complete shift.

WOW. I had to wonder if you were being serious about the hospital and kids loving him bit. Just reading that made sick and I don't think I could stomach to watch it. I really thought Ford would get killed, honestly. This is disgusting. Someone at TPTB must have a huge crush on him because the character is one to laugh at. Gross and totally EMBARRASSING indeed.

Just read; taped before cancellation.. I only hope that means there's still a chance they'll get rid of Ford.

Ford makes me want to vomit. Please oh please show- put him in a body bag.

I know everyone hear hates Ford like I do, but why is everyone rooting for Cutter all of the sudden? Cutter just extorted millions of dollars and the Buchanon mansion from Viki and Clint to put Tess/Jess into St. Anne's!!! Why would Clint let Cuter get away with all of this when he knew for MONTHS that he was a con artist? Couldn't he get Bo's help with the LPD to organize a sting operation to arrest Cutter when he was doing his extortion deal with Clint and Viki at the hospital? Then, they could arrange to anull Tess/Jess and Cutter's marriage, and commit her themselves!!! I know everyone hates the DID s/l with Jessica, but I HATED the way it was handled with Tess/Jess getting her comeuppance!!!

Spelt "here" wrong and Cutter the second time I typed his name!

I mean I spelt Cutter wrong the third time I typed his name! I'm so angry right now that I can't even spell sometimes!!!

Pfffft. We all know that Cutter is going down! My concern is Rapey, Jr aka Ford sucking the life out of Llanview with no end in sight.

I don't think anyone is rooting for Cutter - at all. It's just that no matter how heinous he is, no matter how disgusting he is, he's in the minor league compared with Fudd.

Cutter seems like a baby lamb compared to Ford. They both stink, but Ford is just so much worse.

guilty pleasure, Clint and Viki can't commit Jessica themselves because only her HUSBAND has legal rights to do that. The only reason why Cutter is more tolerable than Ford because the show doesn't sell Cutter as being redeemed while doing bad things. They have Ford doing bad things but they expect us to feel sorry for him! With Cutter, we are not EXPECTED to feel sorry for him. What is so hard to understand about that?

Rose, I unerstand that, but why couldn't Clint pay Cutter off by demanding him to anull his marriage to Tess/Jess and to leave town and have Clint and Viki commit their daughter themselves instead? I know that Cutter is ireedemable by extorting money and the Buchanom mansion from Viki and Clint, but that dosen't make him more tolerable than Ford!

Spelt Buchanon wrong, which makes me still angry that causes my typos!!!

Because she will probably get married with someone else or just run off after Cutter annuls their marriage. It's less risky just having Cutter commit Jessica right there and then. I dislike Cutter and he's not supposed to have redeeming qualities because he's a villain. We are supposed to dislike him so that makes watching scenes with him more tolerable (for me) than watching Ford. The writers are trying to write Ford as a romantic lead and it's disgusting. They are not trying to do that with Cutter so that makes him more tolerable. I have to add that it makes watching SCENES with him more tolerable--not the character. I just can't tolerate watching Ford at all.

@guilty pleasure, while I agree that Clint could buy Cutter a jail cell in Morocco and kidnap Tess to put her in St. Ann's with a couple of phone calls and a wire transfer, this is soap land, and scripts never make sense. No one is rooting for Cutter, all Louise said is, good move on his part. Since he is a con artist and just hit the jackpot, she is 100% correct!

As for me, I prefer Cutter because he is a con artist, makes no apologies for it, and is a hell of a lot easier on the eyes than Ford. Also, he's a better actor. There's a likability to the swine who is Cutter. I didn't know he was leaving the show soon and I'm sorry to hear it because he's so much more fun to watch than whiny Ford, who they had BETTER NOT PAIR WITH JESSICA PERMANENTLY.

I must be an oddball since I kind of like Ford or maybe that's the shallow speaking since the first time I saw him he was just wearing his underwear.

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