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« Bad Idea Jeans (I'm Understating Things Substantially) | Main | A Weird Day Indeed »

July 06, 2011

Cruelty to the Middle-Aged: A Wedding Album

I mean my God, people! We may all give Hunter Tylo a hard time for her plastic surgery, but she's got life in her yet and she's still got a plenty hot bod. May I ask why this was necessary??

Taylorbride1

Oh no! A SHINY WHITE PANTSUIT?! To get MARRIED in?! What did she ever do to deserve this? She's not a freakin' senior citizen!

Taylorbride2

That is just not cool. I mean we get the point. This is not the couple that's "destiny" or whatever (side note: y'all, if I ever get married and in his vows my groom refers to me as "steady and strong" and "a haven of safety," please run up and give me a wedgie in my sexy flared pantsuit so that I'll run from the room in shame and, subsequently, the wedding and the marriage altogether), but this was just cruel. 

(Another side note: please do anything at all -- anything -- to make me run from the room if my groom is roughly:

Ridge1

Okay, thanks y'all!)

But on the upside, the wedding guests were overwhelmed with joy!

Thomas1
Stephanie1
Dayzee2

Moresadguests
Ericthomas

Pop the champagne, people! Wedding of the year! I want to be doing the macarena at that reception!

And might I add that I do not want to ever be on the receiving end of Dayzee's wrath.

Dayzee1

I mean, you'd think spelling her name "DAYZEE" would undermine the intimidation factor, but I assure you, it does not!

And to round out the wedding album, something we should possibly have embossed on the inside cover...

Quote of the day goes, of course, to Brooke: Any woman who has sex with her husband's son does not deserve to be called a wife!

Words to live by.

Comments

HT was drop dead gorgeous and then some hack messed up her face. I hope she sued big time!

I like the pantsuit? I mean, I don't know BB, but isn't this the seventh or eighth time they've been married or whatever? You don't get the frilly dress the tenth time out. Don't hit me, Louise!

Ronn Moss I just CAN'T with that look.

I agree with Bourgeois Nerd about the pants suit. I think this is the best both Hunter Tylo and Ron Moss have looked in a very long time.

Huh. Well, to each his or her own! Truthfully, I thought Taylor looked creepily too much like her BFF/mother-in-law.

Was I the only one that cringe through the whole thing? Simply because of Ridge alone. He's standing there about to marry another woman and he's wearing the flower that his ex-wife gave him. And those vows. How all about me was it? All about what Taylor was going to give him and what she's going to do for him. Barely nothing about what he's going to do for her. But then again when you agree to marry a man that looks rough like that because he can't get over his ex-wife you really don't expect Shakespeare with those vows.

And I might be in the minority but when it came to Dayzee, I was kind of Stephanie side because it truly irks me when someone that don't know the history of two people get on their high horse to judge and she lost her right to mean mug them when she learned the truth yet she chose to keep her own mouth shut.

According to Brad Bell's wife in her recent interview for TVGuide, Taylor's wedding dress is inspired by Bianca Jagger look at her wedding to Mick Jagger.

It was abundantly clear at the Daytime Emmy's that Ron Moss had done something to his face. I don't watch B&B, but my husband, who knows RM as the guy from the band Player said, "Isn't that the "Baby Come Back" guy? What the heck happened to him?"

It looked like the marriage of two store mannequins. HT's face resembles a Kabuki mask, and Ronn Moss will soon be turning 60, and still thinks stubble makes him look sexy. The unhappy expression on Ridge's face looked like he was waiting for test results from a proctology exam, and he expected the news to be bad.

While Ridge was marrying Taylor who his apparently the human equivalent of a stuffed animal, Taylor seemed to be marrying Stephanie. Who does that in the middle of their wedding? Seriously, I wish that the writers had gone back to the storyline where Taylor and Eric almost hooked up. It would make more sense than this travesty. And how did Ridge and Taylor get their divorces so quickly? On the way to the mall to pick up Taylor's pantsuit?

I don't keep up with B&B as regularly as I used to but.....umm.....where's Whip?

realbrenda4evr, poor Whip got cast aside like he had never mattered to Taylor, to the point where Taylor was acting like she couldn't even stand him touching her. It was after Taylor ate the berries and had a fantasy of her, Ridge, and his speedo on an island. After that it went downhill and Whip realized that Taylor would never be over Ridge and left Taylor and she didn't really spare a moment's thought about the destruction of her marriage.

hard to read with your background

Poor Whipple. I've been a Taylor fan for years, but she's being an idiot. Ridge is just going to leave her again.

Man I'd love to see Rick Hearst back on GH.

I've been anxiously waiting your next B&B recap and it did NOT disappoint!! The wedding sounds absolutely horrid, and your screencaps with text are BRILLIANT!! Hilarious comment of Dayzee's name and wrath. Looking forward to MORE!! <3

I swear his vows made it sound like he was describing an insurance company. For a minute I started to look it up in the yellow pages and ask for a quote on a house/car combo before I realized he was talking about the woman whom he supposedly loved and was about to marry! smh

This wedding was just hilarious and reading your summary of it (with te accompanying pictures of the enthused attendees) just made me laugh and laugh and laugh and....

Taylor looks like a Batman villain.

Ridge looks like a homeless Auton.

Maybe I'm just used to her "new face" now, but I don't think Hunter looks that bad. I've seen far, far worse, including Ronn Moss himself. He looks like he's wearing silent movie makeup.

I was just excited that Thorne was on four days in a row and actually got to speak for a change. I was the idiot that cheered when I saw him again. Felicia was on too and hey Kristen was mentioned. Wow there are other Forrester kids but apparently Stephanie isn't aware of this since she has an unhealthy obsession with this one son that isn't even a Forrester.

I keep waiting for Taylor to start wearing pantsuits after all her BFF Stephanie is the Queen of Pantsuits. Not to mention the Queen of Mean. Ridge just looks like he wants to slit his wrists and I have no idea what's going on with his face. I could understand fighting over Thorne but Ridge I've never understood.

I see Taylor didn't take my advice about agreeing to marry him only on the condition that he lose the sideburns. She gave him that inch, and now he's taken a mile with the stubble.

As for the vows, sounds like shades of Tad and Cara's wedding on AMC. The word love was not mentioned, in spite of the fact that the immigration officer was sitting right there watching!

savings from winding down combat operations in Iraq and Afghanistan.

the plan also counts about

I really hope so!!!!!

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