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« The Post-Irene Blues | Main | And There Are Silver Linings Yet »

August 30, 2011

A Letter to Nora Hanen Gannon Buchanan

Dear D.A. Buchanan,

An attorney you've opposed more than a few times, Tea Delgado, Esq., recently said that "friends don't give friends constant unsolicited advice." Well, first of all, someone needs to inform like half the friends in the world of this rule because I'm not sure it's been widely distributed. Second of all, I am therefore going to break the rule and offer you some friendly, unsolicited advice.

Get a grip.

You've been through absolute hell lately. You were abducted, tied up, tortured, and almost raped. You were in a car accident. You thought your beloved husband had cheated on you. You learned your ex-husband and current brother-in-law was responsible for your abduction. You learned that your teenage son killed a man in cold blood. You sold out all your values to protect him. He then suffered a head injury and was nearly declared brain-dead, and you had a team of lunatics demanding you pull the plug on your son. Then after a brief moment of hope and consciousness, your son fell back into a coma and hasn't had a change in months. Then you found out your son's teenage best friend is pregnant by your comatose son. Rough year, dude. I wouldn't deign to claim otherwise, Mrs. DA. I wouldn't. It's almost like you're a friggin' soap opera character you've had so much drama!

But Mrs. Hanen Gannon Buchanan? You crossed a line when you yelled at Destiny when she had planned to terminate her pregnancy. You should not have begged her to have the baby and let you raise it. But as an immediate response? You're a desperate, heartbroken woman and I can forgive your lapse in judgment even if Destiny's mother did not. However, some time has passed. I can't really tell you how much time because you seem to live inside some vortex in the space-time continuum in which some people are experiencing a full week while others are experiencing one evening, so I won't try to contextualize this with any time-based specificity. The point is, some undisclosed amount of time having passed, you need to get your head on straight. Destiny has decided to have the baby and it's time to go on with your life and let her come to you if she wants to include you in this process. Otherwise, now's the time to back off. Big-time.

Oh yeah, and you know how you and Bo have barely had time to breathe and don't know what's going on with most of your drama-prone family and friends because all you ever do is work or travel back and forth to the specialized treatment facility in which your son Matthew is being treated? Can you explain to me where in this scenario you are going to raise a newborn infant?? You're not going to quit your jobs, so as I see it, the thing you'll have to give up is your visits to Matthew. To clarify: you will raise Matthew's child because you're so grief-stricken about the idea of losing Matthew, and will therefore stop seeing Matthew. Explain this logic to me?

What happens if Matthew wakes up? What if he wakes up and needs in-home rehab treatment around the clock? Are you going to ignore him so you can take care of his infant? What if he wakes up and needs to continue treatment in the facility for months or even years to come? Are you going to limit your visits to once a week because you have a baby to care for? 

And remember Destiny's arguments to you when she didn't want to keep the baby -- they went something like: she wants to stay a kid, she wants to finish high school with everyone else, she wants to go away to college and pursue her dreams and not have to worry about being a mother during all of that. You didn't accept any of those arguments then, but now they are all your very own arguments for why you're now convincing yourself that you should insert yourself into Destiny's pregnancy and ask, what? For her to give you her child? For her to share custody of her child with you?

Oh, DA Buchanan. Stop convincing yourself of this. Focus on your job and your son and your husband and all the madness around you, and be there for Destiny if she comes to you. She knows your position, and she will seek you out if she wants to. Until then, please, I beg of you, don't do what it looks like you're going to do!

I thank you for your time, Nora Hanen Gannon Buchanan.

Love,

Weezie

P.S. Dude. Victor got shot again.

Comments

LMAO! I feel sorry for Nora, but this fixation she has on the baby, well, I guess I understand, but it's so unhealthy! (and kind of creepy)

It seems like OLTL has recorded a lot of great scenes, but they are running them in the wrong order something...I know they don't tape them in order, but something is seriously wrong with the pacing of the show.

Still - best soap on TV!

I laugh every time I hear (or read) Nora's full name...it's like someone getting ready to do the banana song.

Anyway, totally agree. Nora definitely needs to get her head on straight.

Replacement Matthew, that's all this baby is. If it survives (which I think it won't) and Bora raise it, it will have so many freaking problems. And seriously, it's like all Nora sees Destiny as is an incubator for her beloved Matthew replacement.

You definitely raise some great points about what would happen if Matthew wakes up and needs a lot of help. The baby or Matthew are going to have to suffer and regardless of who it is, it's going to suck for that person.

Nora should just be happy that a piece of Matthew will survive if Matthew never recovers and want to help Destiny in any way that Destiny wants, not imposing her crazy need for a replacement Matthew on the poor teen.

I would think that the jack-slap Destiny's mom gave to her in the courthouse a few weeks back would have jarred her into sense. LOL. I actually still have that recorded on my DVR. That was a helluva slap!

Seriously, I can understand Nora's desperation. She apologized for pressuring Destiny into keeping the baby. She knows doing that was wrong but she is desperate to hold onto hope as Matthew is such a large part of her life. I think Bo should counterbalance her thinking as he tends to be more level-headed. I give Nora a pass.

Louise - Funny, after reading your recount of Nora's year, I am angry that Clint got away with all of that. His actions set the train into motion that led to Matthew killing Eddie. Was that ever determined to self-defense or is Matthew a homicidal maniac?

Speaking of homicidal teenagers, can we please have a recast for Jack? That actor is beyond terrible and forces me to FFWD his scenes.

Also, I think Shane shot Todd...that way OLTL will maintain its record of the most soap teens killing people in an one-year span.

Thank goodness Nora Hanen Gannon Buchanan has a "get a grip" girlfriend in you, Weezie.

And hey, Nora, how's that daughter of yours doing? You know, the one who could still bear you a grandchild at some point?

Shut up, "Who Shot Victor?" murder (?) mystery.

/-/-/Also, I think Shane shot Todd...that way OLTL will maintain its record of the most soap teens killing people in an one-year span./-/-/

Soapbaby, if Shane shoots Todd/Victor, than can they at least let him continue his shooting spree and take out Howdy Doody Ford, Starr's puppet boyfriend, and Prono Ford, and empty the rest of the chamber into Sleazoid SixPack Ford? That way, no jury in Llanview or anywhere else will convict him, nor should they.

I like Nora, I like Bo, but as Nora's good friend Weezie says, this has not been thought out. And there is such an ICK factor in Destiny and Matthew getting physical, and even more in it ending up with a pregnancy.

If Nora does get the kid, she better hope it doesn't inherit Destiny's grandma's left hook. She has a mean one.

Nora needs to chill out!

Nora needs to chill out and Matthew needs to wake up...Matthew could be doing great in this sl he has the acting chops...but nooooooooooooooooo he is stuck in a bed soemwhere...Then again might be safer there...cause you known Shaun is gonna beat that ass!

Nora Hanen Gannon Buchanan Colson Buchanan Buchanan.

It's strange, I don't endorse teen pregnancy at all, but I seem to be the only one who doesn't think Nora's desires are that unreasonable. It's clear that mentally she is at a phase where she needs her family. Given the career compromises she's been making recently, I would not be surprised if she retired as DA to focus her attention on her son and grandchild. It's not implausible or unrealistic. She apologized for using guilt to pressure Destiny into making a decision she was uncomfortable with. However, the fact is that Destiny was never clearminded about the sex or the pregnancy anyway. IMO, Nora has been the most (scarily) clearminded, because she has offered to help Destiny fulfill her "destiny" in anyway she chooses and is actually in the position to do it.

Destiny and her mother, on the other hand, have been stepping all over the very circumstance that makes them a family. I don't get it! Is Destiny afraid that she'll become Greg (with whom she apparently had a good enough relationship that she adored him, but she has seemly cut-off since he's been in jail)? I've never understood her resentment towards her parents for taking her in and giving her a good life, love and support. Particularly since it was unlikely that she would have received the same had she been raised by self-centered Greg or given up for adoption or foster care. It's like the writers wanted to give a Pollyanna some edge, but just turned her into a brat who's more sympathetic to people who are only friends with her because she dotes on them (Matthew, Greg, even Dani a little), than to people who genuinely care for and love her because she's a good person (Shaun, her parents, Bo & Nora, Darren, heck even David Vickers clearly respects her as a person, not just Matthew's friend).

Ooh we forgot Rappaport in her list of names.

My problem with this storyline for Nora is that it's setting her up as a person who believes she can replace one child with another. When Drew died, she had Matthew to replace him. Now that Matthew is (seemingly) out of the picture, she wants Destiny's baby to replace Matthew.

I've always felt that a child was irreplaceable. But that's just me.

Personally, I do not count Colson or Rappaport as Nora's last name. I just don't accept it! What can I say.

I keep hoping that Destiny loses the baby and they are able to use the stem cells from the fetus to restore Matthew to his former self, since Eddie Alderson is a much better actor than Shenell Edmonds/Destiny, and I'd rather watch him on-screen for the closing months of the show. But that's just me.

Linda, it is definitely not just you!

Louise, you don't have to accept Colson or Rappaport. Nora's sham marriage to Daniel was annulled, so the name can be wiped from her slate. As for Rappaport, she never had that albatross of a name attached to her as she never married Sam. As it stands, her full name completely rhymes.

David (officiating Bo & Nora's wedding): "Nora Hanen Gannon Buchanan Hanen Buchanan Buchanan; if you're thinking Colson, you're wrong - that marriage was annulled."

PS: Nora didn't have Matthew to replace Drew. Bo & Nora were already trying for a baby well before Drew died. Ultimately, comfort sex created Matthew, Nora thought otherwise and lied about being pregnant to get through to a suicidal Bo, found herself trapped in the lie, and alas and with a heavy heart... the cabana happened. ::shudder::

@Cory Thanks for the correction...I hadn't really been watching at that time, in fact, Matthew was nearly a teen when I returned to the show, so from the way certain things were said/played, I simply always thought that.

I could have sworn Nora was married to Sam. Ah well. That was around the same time I suppose. Or maybe it was from the way Lindsay acted about the whole thing.

Her name's even funnier with each extra Buchanan tacked on. Does anyone know if they did her name that way on purpose?

Cindy, Nora was engaged to Sam, but she never married him. Thank God. In fact, she spent what was to be the evening/night of her wedding to Sam trapped and dancing with Bo in a warehouse.

Also, considering that HBS was hired specifically as an eventual love interest for RSW, and Nora came to town already as Nora Hanen Gannon, I'm guessing that yes, the rhyming was fully intentional. Which makes it even funnier, IMO.

In addition to all the very valid points the Weezie made in her role as desperately needed Get A Grip Girlfriend there's one other thing Nora doesn't seem to be considering---if Matthew wakes up it's very possible that he is not going to be thrilled that thanks to his mother's interference he's got a lifetime commitment to a child. Having the child living with the folks is unlikely to make that better.

LOL LOL LOL, Louise! Nora is SERIOUSLY out of line. I loved Destiny's mother telling her she won't allow her to try to replace Matthew with Destiny's baby.

And Lori K, thank you, I have been thinking that Matthew is going to wake up and go "What the HELL? I have a KID?" I hope he's not shocked back into a coma by it.

I have only three words: SHUT UP, NORA.

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