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« Some Damn Good Montage (Alternate Title: Tears. So Many Tears!) | Main | Coming To You Straight From Cloud 9 »

September 20, 2011

Pride and Petulance

If it weren't for--I probably should have started this post with a disclaimer, because what I'm about to type is shocking and I think it would be safest for all of you if you read this while sitting and avoiding drinking, lest you faint or choke, which would make me feel incredibly guilty--Sonny (RIGHT? About the shocking? SONNY!), I'd have probably fast forwarded the entirety of today's episode of General Hospital. I mean, Carly and Shawn forcing charm? The ongoing shenanigans with Sam's engagement ring? Franco (yes, Franco is back, because why not? Why not give the eighteen remaining viewers a reason to tune out?) evilly/cheerfully monologuing to his cymbal-playing monkey about his (futile) plans for the destruction of the world? It was basically the living definition of a must-miss episode.

Except for Sonny's fit of RAGE and Patrick hotly and hot-headedly giving it right back to him which caused Sonny to become flustered and when Sonny gets flustered, his grasp on the English language and commonly accepted methods of conversing...um, those things disappear. It was immensely entertaining.

A barely paraphrased recap follows; I italicized the lines that were actually spoken, because they were too amazing to satirize.

SONNY: I want to talk about my daughter's health...and yours.
MATT: Relax, dude.
SONNY: Don't talk to me while I'm trying to menace you. Why can't my daughter walk? You better hope she recovers, Doc. You know what happens to people who...who don't...who don't HOPE? DEATH!


PATRICK: Back off, Sonny.
SONNY: Hey. Hey. Your...your brother, he...he screwed up the surgery. You know what he did, Patrick.
PATRICK: There's no one in this hospital who could have done a better job, okay. And I'm including myself here, so you know that I really mean this.
MATT: I'm going to go see my patient.
SONNY: Yeah? Well, I'm going to see my daughter.
MATT: That's..the same person.
SONNY: Yeah, you would say that.

PATRICK: You're out of control, Sonny. First of all, you bring it into my home and attack my family. Now you bring it into my hospital? Attacking the surgeon who saved your daughter's mobility?
SONNY: You're looking...you're looking out for the hospital or you're doing damage control for your brother, Patrick?
PATRICK: I--
SONNY: Isn't that a conflict of interest?
PATRICK: It--
SONNY: Nepotism?
PATRICK: Sonny--
SONNY: Bros before hos? You calling my daughter a ho? Because let me tell you something, your brother is second string.
PATRICK: Sonny--
SONNY: Plan B.
PATRICK: But--
SONNY: The spare.
PATRICK: Did you just learn about synonyms? Look, neurosurgery's just a little harder than what you do, breaking kneecaps to shake people down.
SONNY: Yeah? I'm going to pretend you didn't say that. I'm gonna be the bigger man.
PATRICK ...
SONNY: I'm...I'm gonna be the better man.
PATRICK: Your daughter needs a parent, Sonny. Not an out of control thug who makes everything worse.
SONNY: Really? What could be worse than maybe being paralyzed for a few more episodes?
PATRICK: Look, Matt operated on her to fix something you did. He gave her a chance at a normal life.
SONNY: I'll check on that and get back to you.
PATRICK: Please do.
SONNY: Yeah, I will.
PATRICK: Good.
SONNY: Yeah, it's good that I will.
PATRICK: That's what I just said.
SONNY: That's what I'm saying.
PATRICK: ...I know.
SONNY: LAST WORD!

Sonny's rage was eventually cured by remembering the sunset on the island; or maybe by the way Kate seemed to get turned on by his reminiscing about the sunset on the island. At any rate, he was inspired to halfheartedly apologize to Matt, which impressed Kate truly and absolutely, so their reunion is even more imminent than we expected.

Comments

Great article. Glad I tuned out--what a total waste of time.

I just can not get behind this storyline. Could have been good. Could have been decent. There was already tension in Sonny/Krissy's father/daughter relationship but really, really with this storyline. I can not get behind this storyline because of two things. 1. They are showing how stupid the adults are by following a 13 year old's theory and 2. they are ignoring the bus crash like it never happened instead of explaining why the bus crash is the culprit. It makes this whole storyline ridiculous everytime someone says it was the car bomb that caused Krissy's injury.

On another note, am I the only one that is 'huh' and 'what' when it comes to Sam involving this wedding. She's done nothing for this wedding except pick out her dress. She's been harping over and over again how 'overwhelmed' she is and how people are constantly 'hounding' her about this wedding when she's really done nothing for this wedding. That's been all Maxie and when she's with Jason, her family, she's the first one to bring up this wedding so who exactly hounding her.

These two storylines are the main ones that have me 'huh' and 'what' through majority of it. I was 'huh' and 'what' over the kidnapping storyline, but that's over with so luckily that's one storyline I no longer have to 'huh and 'what' over anymore.

I actually laughed out loud when Sonny threw Matt up against the wall. The whole thing was so ridiculous. Sonny's spitting rage was hilarious and awesomely bad.

Why does every one assume it was the car bomb Sonny planted the cause of Kristina's injuries? Was the bus crash ruled out? I am as pleased as anyone that Sonny is finally being held accountable for planting that car bomb that could've killed Kristina but it's a bit too late given every one has been super-close since. Also, I cannot ignore the other very possible cause of Kristina's current medical woes. Poor writing.

Well, was Alexis around?

It's possible that Sonny wasn't responsible.

But my life is every so slightly improved by pretending that he was, just because, well, Sonny, hate, ruined show, hate, etc. I'll take what I can get.

In all of years following Laura Wright's career in soaps, from Loving to The City to Guiding Light to General Hospital, I have never seen her lack this type of romantic chemistry with anyone like she does with Sean Blakemore (Shawn)...other than Maurice Benard (Sonny.) If Carly must have a romance, let's get Ingo Rademacher back and not in some lame triangle involving Jax/Carly/Shawn. I wish GH would write Shawn away from the mob and chem-test him Alexis, Olivia, Kate or just write him off. Right now, he's terribly dull.

That's because soapbaby they are only writing him as Carly's bitch boy. I use to like this character but it's killing me how well-rounded and unselfish they are making him think Carly is. I LMAO when he asked her when was the last time she thought about herself when she was just thinking about herself when she was talking to him.

Carly's men operate from a position of power - AJ from a powerful family; Jason, mob enforcer; Sonny, mob boss; Jax, corporate raider. I think there are no sparks with Carly and Shawn because he has no corporate power and no money, only muscle, so he is out of character for her...my opinion.

At least Elizabeth and Matt were cute. I'm enjoying watching Maxie's head explode.

Totally OT: Mallory, do you have plans to go back to blogging about Day of Our Lives in the near future? (Or was it Becca who followed Days?) Because it looks like next week is going to mark a return to what made Days great. Marlena and John, Carrie and Austin (the REAL Carrie and Austin) and Jack! (Jack! Jack! Jack!) Plus I spied Wally Kurth in a crowd scene in the promo, so he must have already returned. And you know what they say: if you can't have Wally Kurth as Ned Ashton, Justin Kiriakis is the next best thing...

The ONLY good thing about this episode was Patrick getting in Sonny's face and shoving him. Wish he'd cold-cocked that little moobster.

I shouldn't get irritated by this, since this show continues to ignore or forget what they've shown us just DAYS (how can we italicize or bold?) before. When Patrick was diagnosing Kristina, he warned her that there was a chance she would be paralyzed. I can't recall if that little moobster was there when that conversation took place.

Now, it turns out that Patrick's diagnosis was wrong--it wasn't a bone splinter pressing againts her spine, or whatever his original diagnosis was, but something different and Matt had to do a quick fix, which, unfortunately resulted in paralysis in.ONE.LEG. Is that even medically possible? But, I digress.

I just want that stutterbarking little moobster gone from this show. And because I loathe Sonny and have since Day ONE, I don't care that people aren't considering the bus crash responsible for Kristina's condition. I'm loving the 99.9% hate, contempt and blaming of Sonny that's going around. Even ROBIN's rose tinted glasses have broken and shattered.

Yep, this is exectly why I tuned out after Brenda (the only reason why I stuck around as long as I did) left. Judging by this recap - this was one of the wisest decisions that I made all year.

Has it been long enough to say that I am officially disappointed by "new writer"? Sure we have some more characters on our screens, but the same idiotic storylines are dominating. Is it Frons or JFP?

Why can't anyone get a clue--this soap will never return to even half its former glory with the mob as the central theme. Sonny is no one's idea of a hero. I can't stomach the Jason worship--a few weeks ago Sam was in the chapel praying to God that Jason wake up unchanged, and she said her prayers were answered. So presumably God thinks it's ok that Jason is a hit man.

The new Kate? Anthony plotting to free Lisa Niles? Lulu making the same idiotic argument a million times. There are no words.

It's hard to decide which is the worst soap right now. It's a toss-up between GH and DOOL. I know Days is having a big re-launch on Sept. 26th, but it's hard for me to be optimistic.

The only discernable difference I can detect between Gavin Wolf and Bob Guza, Jr. is that now a Quartermaine occasionally pops up on-screen. Not very much difference at all.

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