The Old-School Approach
Because my way-too-new-and-expensive-for-this-crap laptop crashed and is waiting for its turn at the computer doctor, I've rented an utterly craptastic replacement in the interim. I just waited fifteen minutes for it to start up and and then another five minutes for this web page to load, so let's just say it might be a bit of a bare-bones approach the next few days (depending on how things go). (I mean seriously, it doesn't even have a battery. I have to shut it down and restart it if I want to move from the living room to the bedroom. My dog knocked the power cord off earlier and I lost what I was working on. This is insane! What is this, the 19th Century?!) I will finally start to pay up on my long ago promise (that was cut short after only three or four installments) of the occasional Serial Drama stroll down OLTL Memory Lane.
So here we go with a basic recap of today's One Life to Live, which was a fairly low-key one.
Paris, Texas. How do we know this?
The old-school way!
Viki and Charlie see one another and ask what each other is doing at the Bon Jour Cafe.
Llanview. Jess and... oh, crap. It's one of those episodes. Jess and her boyfriend/babydaddy and Ryder are Christmas tree shopping, and what do you know? Ford has a darling story about how he's a Christmas tree expert because of some dumb adorable story about how he was an unreprehensible young lad who took an interest in such things because he is just the blandest cutest sweetest most milquetoasty Dudley Do Right who ever lived.
Kim fills Clint in on Stacy's dastardly deeds. Clint is worried about how this'll affect Shane and Rex.
Paris, Texas. Turns out Cutter and Gigi are staying in the same hotel as Shane and Rex. Obviously.
Llanview, Angel Square. Aubrey and Rama, too, are Christmas tree shopping. Aubrey tells Rama about her Christmas plans with Rex.
Shaun and Vivian are among those Llanviewites shopping for trees. Vivian signs Shaun's petition to save Fraternity Row, as she scheduled her med school classes around Lorraine and Derwood's wedding.
Kim tells Clint about how Cutter framed her for the murder and wrote those fake "Dear John/Dear Jane" letters to the two of them, and she declares that she wants her cowboy back.
Charlie and Viki wistfully reminisce about Gigi and manage to get cute smiles out of each other.
Gigi flashes back to an early scene of her with Shane.
Commercials. Including one for The Revolution, which can go suck itself.
Clint's not so sure he and Kim would still be together if David and Cutter hadn't interfered. Kim suggests that Clint find out what he's been missing, but he tells her there's someone else standing in the way.
Charlie reports to Viki that he's maintaining his sobriety. They catch up a bit, and Charlie worries that seeing her in that diner uniform might mean she's run away from her life again.
Jessica feels sorry for Ford because of his bad childhood. Poor thing must not have had many happy holidays! He tells some sob story about how Eddie would go to a bar on Christmas Eve instead of being with his family, and he sure does have a cheery disposition about it! He's going to spoil Ryder rotten to make up for it (this is an excellent idea, as spoiling a child rotten has never led to anything bad). Jessica and Ford smile way too hard at each other.
Shaun and Vivian strategize about how she can win over Shaun's mother even while not being willing to marry into the family.
Rama worries that Aubrey is getting too attached to Rex, and Aubrey pointed out that he kissed her before he went to Texas.
Every time I do these scene-for-scene recaps, I'm reminded that the scenes are way too short these days. I'm loving the show right now, but it's still so hard for the characters to really delve into anything when there basically has to be "dramatic scene-ending dialogue" every thirty seconds. This drives me nuts. Anyway, Gigi wonders why she's having Gigi's flashbacks. Maybe Farrah Fath can tell us about the in-depth preparation she did for these scenes on an episode of Dirty Soap next season. Next season? Just kidding!
Shaun and Ford fight over a Christmas tree they both want. Shaun asks them to sign the "Save Fraternity Row" petition, and Ford is apparently morally opposed to a television show staying on the air because said television show did not hire him. (Aha! Then I should want ALL television shows off the air, right?!) Jess pretends to be a bigger fan of Southwest General, but they are easily convinced when Shaun's willing to let them have that Christmas tree, and they sign. Turns out Ford was faking, too, and loves the show. Well, not every fan is awesome, right?
Aubrey thinks Rex will be ready to start letting go of Gigi when he returns from Texas.
Gigi is still talking about knowing where the ketchup was at the Bon Jour Cafe. That's right, we're still on the ketchup.
Kim thinks the person "between them" Clint is referring to is Natalie, and suggests that they go out clubbing together because she's sure Natalie "knows how to party." Oh, Kim, Natalie wouldn't know what to do within four blocks of a club. But she certainly knows how to party.
Then we get alternating scenes in which Viki tells Charlie about Clint and Clint tells Kim about Viki. Kim looks pretty damn jealous! Charlie just looks like his usual injured-animal self, but is so self-possessed that he asks Viki right away to consider whether or not she's still in love with Clint (I, uh... I have people I ended relationships with more than ten years ago with whom I would not be comfortable having this conversation! Boy is Charlie's broken heart resilient!).
Aubrey and Rama wonder if Kim is out of jail.
Kim suspects that Viki is a consolation prize, and Clint insists in no uncertain terms that Viki is no one's consolation prize. Kim tells him he's going to have to choose, while Charlie wonders aloud to Viki if the way he treated her is what has led her to this indecision about getting involved again. He reminds her that he chose Echo over her, which is a super foundation for a pep talk. She probably feels way better now, Charlie!
Cutter tries to convince Gigi that she's really Stacy, but Gigi faints. When she comes to, she has another flashback -- but this time it's to Kim "finding" her and calling her Stacy. Gigi is disappointed that she's lame-ass Stacy and not most-wonderful-woman-ever Gigi and Cutter comforts her. I'm ever surprised at how much I enjoy these two together.
Shane wants to know why Rex invited Aubrey to Christmas, while Jessica gives Aubrey a little attitude at the Christmas tree lot. She gives attitude to Aubrey, but has sex with Ford. Just so we're clear on her moral compass here.
Kim tells Clint that she understands he has feelings for two women, but he can't have them both, and leaves him to think it over and make a choice. She, of course, leaves some pink lipstick on his cheek.
Shane asks Rex if Aubrey makes him happy, and he guesses so. (I swoon!) He calls Aubrey to check in, and she tells him about her big decorating plans at his house. And for these two as well... I really enjoy them together. It makes me feel weird, and almost grumpy (since I realize these are not intended to be the root-for pairings, although the show's done a nice job setting them up as very legitimate spoilers to the Rex/Gigi reunion instead of just boring placeholders, you know?). Speaking of which, Gigi asks Cutter to hold her.
Shaun talks to himself about his plans to marry Vivian, regardless of her insistence that she will never marry. Romantic!
Kim and Rama run into each other and take an awful lot of time taking off their jewelry to prepare for their mandatory catfight. It's kind of excellent.
Charlie asks Viki if she's going to keep running away or if she's going to run toward happiness with Clint, while Jessica pokes fun at her papa for always having trouble making up his mind.
And then... weird. We cut very briefly to Shane sleeping, Rex lying awake, Cutter sleeping, and Gigi lying awake with a furrowed brow. Okee dokes.
By the way, my cable guide today says, "David's family gets a surprise; things get tense in regard to Destiny's child." Well, first of all, good on the folks who write these blurbs for not being able to resist using "Destiny's child." Second of all, I guess we know what happens tomorrow!
Remember the Tabernacle of Joy?
The story of Rebecca Lewis is so indelibly connected with the start of Todd's (never-quite-finished!) "redemption" and with Powell and everything that unfolded with Powell's and Rebecca's his-and-hers breakdowns (that were sadly revisited a few years ago, turning Rebecca into a serial killer as Powell's accomplice), that I often forget her terrific introduction -- she was Angela Holiday's assistant at her fake church that was just a con Angela and Cain set up to squeeze Llanviewites for cash.
They got busted, though!
I just loved this story. Poor Cord!
Did anyone else have as much fun with this storyline as I did?