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« So Much Anger (Mostly Jason's. But Also The Audience's Because...You Know) | Main | The Thing About Dash Dunning »

December 13, 2011

The Old-School Approach

Because my way-too-new-and-expensive-for-this-crap laptop crashed and is waiting for its turn at the computer doctor, I've rented an utterly craptastic replacement in the interim. I just waited fifteen minutes for it to start up and and then another five minutes for this web page to load, so let's just say it might be a bit of a bare-bones approach the next few days (depending on how things go). (I mean seriously, it doesn't even have a battery. I have to shut it down and restart it if I want to move from the living room to the bedroom. My dog knocked the power cord off earlier and I lost what I was working on. This is insane! What is this, the 19th Century?!) I will finally start to pay up on my long ago promise (that was cut short after only three or four installments) of the occasional Serial Drama stroll down OLTL Memory Lane.

So here we go with a basic recap of today's One Life to Live, which was a fairly low-key one.

Paris, Texas. How do we know this?


The old-school way!

Viki and Charlie see one another and ask what each other is doing at the Bon Jour Cafe.

Llanview. Jess and... oh, crap. It's one of those episodes. Jess and her boyfriend/babydaddy and Ryder are Christmas tree shopping, and what do you know? Ford has a darling story about how he's a Christmas tree expert because of some dumb adorable story about how he was an unreprehensible young lad who took an interest in such things because he is just the blandest cutest sweetest most milquetoasty Dudley Do Right who ever lived. 

Kim fills Clint in on Stacy's dastardly deeds. Clint is worried about how this'll affect Shane and Rex.

Paris, Texas. Turns out Cutter and Gigi are staying in the same hotel as Shane and Rex. Obviously.

Llanview, Angel Square. Aubrey and Rama, too, are Christmas tree shopping. Aubrey tells Rama about her Christmas plans with Rex.

Shaun and Vivian are among those Llanviewites shopping for trees. Vivian signs Shaun's petition to save Fraternity Row, as she scheduled her med school classes around Lorraine and Derwood's wedding.

Kim tells Clint about how Cutter framed her for the murder and wrote those fake "Dear John/Dear Jane" letters to the two of them, and she declares that she wants her cowboy back.

Charlie and Viki wistfully reminisce about Gigi and manage to get cute smiles out of each other.

Gigi flashes back to an early scene of her with Shane. 

Commercials. Including one for The Revolution, which can go suck itself.

Clint's not so sure he and Kim would still be together if David and Cutter hadn't interfered. Kim suggests that Clint find out what he's been missing, but he tells her there's someone else standing in the way. 

Charlie reports to Viki that he's maintaining his sobriety. They catch up a bit, and Charlie worries that seeing her in that diner uniform might mean she's run away from her life again.

Jessica feels sorry for Ford because of his bad childhood. Poor thing must not have had many happy holidays! He tells some sob story about how Eddie would go to a bar on Christmas Eve instead of being with his family, and he sure does have a cheery disposition about it! He's going to spoil Ryder rotten to make up for it (this is an excellent idea, as spoiling a child rotten has never led to anything bad). Jessica and Ford smile way too hard at each other.

Shaun and Vivian strategize about how she can win over Shaun's mother even while not being willing to marry into the family.

Rama worries that Aubrey is getting too attached to Rex, and Aubrey pointed out that he kissed her before he went to Texas.

Every time I do these scene-for-scene recaps, I'm reminded that the scenes are way too short these days. I'm loving the show right now, but it's still so hard for the characters to really delve into anything when there basically has to be "dramatic scene-ending dialogue" every thirty seconds. This drives me nuts. Anyway, Gigi wonders why she's having Gigi's flashbacks. Maybe Farrah Fath can tell us about the in-depth preparation she did for these scenes on an episode of Dirty Soap next season. Next season? Just kidding!

Shaun and Ford fight over a Christmas tree they both want. Shaun asks them to sign the "Save Fraternity Row" petition, and Ford is apparently morally opposed to a television show staying on the air because said television show did not hire him. (Aha! Then I should want ALL television shows off the air, right?!) Jess pretends to be a bigger fan of Southwest General, but they are easily convinced when Shaun's willing to let them have that Christmas tree, and they sign. Turns out Ford was faking, too, and loves the show. Well, not every fan is awesome, right?

Aubrey thinks Rex will be ready to start letting go of Gigi when he returns from Texas.

Gigi is still talking about knowing where the ketchup was at the Bon Jour Cafe. That's right, we're still on the ketchup.

Kim thinks the person "between them" Clint is referring to is Natalie, and suggests that they go out clubbing together because she's sure Natalie "knows how to party." Oh, Kim, Natalie wouldn't know what to do within four blocks of a club. But she certainly knows how to party

Then we get alternating scenes in which Viki tells Charlie about Clint and Clint tells Kim about Viki. Kim looks pretty damn jealous! Charlie just looks like his usual injured-animal self, but is so self-possessed that he asks Viki right away to consider whether or not she's still in love with Clint (I, uh... I have people I ended relationships with more than ten years ago with whom I would not be comfortable having this conversation! Boy is Charlie's broken heart resilient!).

Rex is bummed that Shane doesn't want to watch Christina Comes Home for Christmas (aww!), and Rex breaks it to Shane that he invited Aubrey to spend Christmas with them.

Aubrey and Rama wonder if Kim is out of jail.

Kim suspects that Viki is a consolation prize, and Clint insists in no uncertain terms that Viki is no one's consolation prize. Kim tells him he's going to have to choose, while Charlie wonders aloud to Viki if the way he treated her is what has led her to this indecision about getting involved again. He reminds her that he chose Echo over her, which is a super foundation for a pep talk. She probably feels way better now, Charlie!

Cutter tries to convince Gigi that she's really Stacy, but Gigi faints. When she comes to, she has another flashback -- but this time it's to Kim "finding" her and calling her Stacy. Gigi is disappointed that she's lame-ass Stacy and not most-wonderful-woman-ever Gigi and Cutter comforts her. I'm ever surprised at how much I enjoy these two together.

Shane wants to know why Rex invited Aubrey to Christmas, while Jessica gives Aubrey a little attitude at the Christmas tree lot. She gives attitude to Aubrey, but has sex with Ford. Just so we're clear on her moral compass here.

Kim tells Clint that she understands he has feelings for two women, but he can't have them both, and leaves him to think it over and make a choice. She, of course, leaves some pink lipstick on his cheek.

Shane asks Rex if Aubrey makes him happy, and he guesses so. (I swoon!) He calls Aubrey to check in, and she tells him about her big decorating plans at his house. And for these two as well... I really enjoy them together. It makes me feel weird, and almost grumpy (since I realize these are not intended to be the root-for pairings, although the show's done a nice job setting them up as very legitimate spoilers to the Rex/Gigi reunion instead of just boring placeholders, you know?). Speaking of which, Gigi asks Cutter to hold her.

Shaun talks to himself about his plans to marry Vivian, regardless of her insistence that she will never marry. Romantic!

Kim and Rama run into each other and take an awful lot of time taking off their jewelry to prepare for their mandatory catfight. It's kind of excellent.

Charlie asks Viki if she's going to keep running away or if she's going to run toward happiness with Clint, while Jessica pokes fun at her papa for always having trouble making up his mind.

And then... weird. We cut very briefly to Shane sleeping, Rex lying awake, Cutter sleeping, and Gigi lying awake with a furrowed brow. Okee dokes.

By the way, my cable guide today says, "David's family gets a surprise; things get tense in regard to Destiny's child." Well, first of all, good on the folks who write these blurbs for not being able to resist using "Destiny's child." Second of all, I guess we know what happens tomorrow!


Memory Lane!

Remember the Tabernacle of Joy?

The story of Rebecca Lewis is so indelibly connected with the start of Todd's (never-quite-finished!) "redemption" and with Powell and everything that unfolded with Powell's and Rebecca's his-and-hers breakdowns (that were sadly revisited a few years ago, turning Rebecca into a serial killer as Powell's accomplice), that I often forget her terrific introduction -- she was Angela Holiday's assistant at her fake church that was just a con Angela and Cain set up to squeeze Llanviewites for cash. 

They got busted, though!


I just loved this story. Poor Cord!

It really had everything. Con artists turning on each other, discoveries of wigs(!), Dorian with giant hair, escaped convicts terrorizing their rape victims (uh... whee? Fun!).

Did anyone else have as much fun with this storyline as I did?


I'm very much enjoying Kim and Clint actually getting to have scenes together again. And I died when Kim suggested her and Natalie bond by going clubbing together. Can you imagine? Kim would probably order "Red Headed Slut" shots and the two would end up tussling in time to techno music. But why film that when we could get another installment of Ford's pathetic back story instead? Siiigh.

And you linked to Kish and Cayla watching "Christina Comes Home For Christmas"! Love!

I don't know if I'll be able to manage it, but I've sworn I won't let any of the Fudds, including the most horrible one of all, Booby Fudd, ruin one second of what remains of OLTL. If that means I have to FF Jessica, then so be it. Otherwise, I start to get all red in the face and begin muttering and feeling the urge to hit the tv.

Otherwise, this was a pretty decent episode, with some really great moments. Vicki and Charlie, and Clint and Kim, those were great. It makes total sense to me that there is a part of Clint that goes for glitter over gold. But it also makes sense to me that by this time in his life, he can now understand and appreciate that Vicki is not only gold, but as much a part of him as anyone can be. I'm so enjoying watching these two come together.

And the crass part of me is waiting to see the outcome of the Rama/Kim showdown!

Yeah! We get another throw down fight and instead of Rama/Aubrey it's Rama/Kim and I can't wait!

I always wanted Clint Richie's (Clint) to reconcile one day with Viki. Sigh. I don't see any chemistry between ES and JvD.

I was so hoping to see "Christina Comes Home for Christmas"!

With the exception of anything involving Ford and Jessica, I actually really liked today's episode. I weirdly also like Rex and Aubrey together. She's the only person I've seen him be remotely likeable with, even if I know it won't last. They just make sense together. I didn't think Gigi ever really had that much of a personality, and Aubrey could be very layered if they would let her.

My favorite part of the episode, however, was not only the Kim/Rama smackdown, but Aubrey's face during the whole thing. PLEASE tell me you have a screencap of that. It was a combination of "I'm kind of scared and worried for my friend, but I'm strangely enjoying this... But I really shouldn't be this amused."

I really enjoyed today's episode (just ffwd'ed anything Terd-related.) I love Aubrey and Rama's relationship and they are so cute/natural. I wish soaps had more fun girlfriend relationships like theirs. Kim is a joy and glad she shared scenes with Clint as she's been wasted with The Morasco Fiascos. Also, liked the Viki/Charlie scenes and found Charlie absolutely charming for the first time ever. I always felt like we got saddled with the least interesting aspects of Paris, Texas (Charlie, Gigi) and not enough Noelle and Moe.

Did anyone catch the state of Pennsylvania health department sign posted on the wall in The Bonjour Cafe (behind Viki and visible in her scenes with Charlie at the counter)? Lol

This is why I love this show: even a low-key day like today is still a garden of delights! Shaun and Viv! Kim and Clint! Viki and Charlie!

I can't believe someone, and KIM of all people, actually showed wisdom and acknowledged that a person CAN have feelings for two people, but they can't have them both. I also love how, for once in a triangle, I'm actually rooting for both couples.

I love Rama and Aubrey's friendship. One thing about OLTL is they actually let women have friendships instead of being nothing but bitches to one another, and, yes, I'm looking at YOU, GH. And the Bitchfight at the Angel Square Christmas Tree Corral? Epic! I hope we get to see some of it.

Poor Aubrey, though. Her Christmas is going to suuuuuuuck once Gigi finally figures out who she is. And poor Cutter, too. When Stigi said, "Could you just hold me?" I squeed a bit. I just think Cutter and Stigi are so much more interesting than Rex and Gigi. Forget Rex, jump up on that Cutter and his boxer-briefs, Gigi!

Love the "Christina Comes Home" shout-out. RC Christmas callback continuity!

Whenever I think of Rebecca I think of her in that brown flower print dress. The Tabernacle of Joy stuff was a lot of fun. I was really sad when they turned around and brought Rebecca back insane.

Susan, yay, someone else who enjoyed the Tabernacle of Joy storyline! Most of the time I mention it to people it barely rings a bell.

And Rebecca's dresses, ugh. At first they made sense, but a year into her story when two men were desperately fighting over it seemed like they needed to spruce her up a bit, but it was always those same three dresses on rotation! (Of course the two men were psycho rapists, so maybe it makes sense...)

I love how old-school soapy this show is (and I love me some Clint and Kim even more!).

Whilst I enjoy the trips down memory lane, I have to say that today's left me kinda cold since it was from the Michael Malone/Josh Griffith era. I don't think I've ever fast-forwarded as much as I did during their tenure: Luna Moody; Max's gambling addiction; teacher for the deaf turned clown Maggie Carpenter; the Todd Manning/Marty Saybrooke rape trial; and anything with Patrick Thornhart -- none of their material worked for me in the least.

I rolled my eyes during the whole Tabernacle of Joy s/l since it was so cheesy! I did fall in love with Rebecca/Todd and knew it was not going to last.

I didn't have a TV when this was originally on, but it was fun to see a glimpse of the old school - Wanda in the front row.

CLINT's attraction to KIM is very ASA-esque!
Have you seen how sexxxxehh CAIN ROGAN looks on BREAKING BAD?
& hey, isn't that Mary Testa as ALBERTA in that TABERNACLE clip?!?

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