And Now, We Count Some Chickens Before They Hatch
Well, the day finally arrived.
Today's air episode was the first with Ron Carlivati as official Head Writer. And we all know what this means. General Hospital viewers the world over are morally obligated to pass judgment immediately on Carlivati's material and make a snap decision about the future of the show and the predicted quality of everything Port Charles that he touches from this point on. Ready?
Okay, in all seriousness, I'm trying really hard to just chill and take it episode by episode. No one can possibly envy the crapfest he inherited: a beloved character who grew up on the show is being killed off, we're in the middle of yet another "OH MY GAH WILL JASON LIVE?!" storyline of which the audience already knows the outcome, we just got the most predictable "somebody is appalled by Sonny and then he proves what a martyred hero he really is" one-two punch, and... well, and Kate.
(Hey Kate! Is a brain a foot, or is a brain not a foot? I'm just asking.)
I love how Tracy, Anthony, and the bus boy are all just politely watching the floor show. (To be fair, I really would love it if Kate were the one who shot Sonny.)
Speaking of Tracy and Anthony, I sure do wish he weren't evil and horrible and a serial killer (but that's par for the course with romantic leads on this show) and blackmailing her into marriage because the peanut gallery over at that table full of empty champagne glasses was pretty excellent.
I know that's what I'd be doing if I lived in Port Charles and ever left the house.
One stamp that the Valentini/Carlivati line-up left one One Life to Live during their tenure there had to do with the smaller nuances and the minor moments. Broadly the show was a bit sloppier than GH, but we could generally expect to find more nuanced small touches rather than a perfectly polished but too-slick big picture (Carly's wet hair today was so specific and did actual storytelling that wasn't in the dialogue). Were there some awkward moments while Patrick tried to break into the lab? Yes. Did it even make any sense that everyone in the hospital heard an explosion and an alarm was going off and yet he was still by himself in the hallway? No, it didn't. But Patrick got his big moment, and we got ours ("dead" Robin was under a tarp -- not that it even matters, because we can even watch someone choke on their own blood and die right in front of us on screen and that still doesn't mean they're dead on Frank and Ron's watch), and I'm pretty psyched to see the follow-up to today's final moment in which Patrick was about to tell Anna about her daughter's "death."
Jason Thompson's ugly cry gets me every time, I'm telling you.
And I have a nervous feeling Finola Hughes might kill me tomorrow.
Overly precocious Molly has annoyed me for years and I did not enjoy TJ's introduction, but I have to say I'm enjoying this storyline with them so far. Krys Meyer is shaping up to be quite the competent young actor, bringing much more to the scenes that the generic "teen with an attitude" intro he got lends itself to. I'm cautiously optimistic about where this teen story might go, as long as they can promise me that destination won't involve a musical. (Plus, getting busted for a booze-laden party when one's parents are out is an adolescent rite of passage near and dear to my own heart.)
Alas, in the midst of promising details and material, we had the status quo at its worst:
Do they just use stock footage for these images at this point? They'd have to, right? I'm sure Valentini's thought about it, it'd save some budget.
And of course, as we all knew would happen the second Dante told Sonny that he was dead to him, they're closer than ever now and ain't it so sweet. We were subjected to this eye-roll fodder today...
Dante: I know, uh, you went after Johnny to protect me.
Sonny: But not the way you wanted to be protected.
Dante: [Smiling. No seriously, smiling.] I see, uh, it sounds like you finally heard me. Maybe we got a chance after all.
Sonny: Does that mean you're gonna let me give you that money, then?
Dante: Hell no! [At this point they're both laughing because, you know, this is hysterical! They're already able to look back and laugh on all the good blood-soaked times.]
Sonny: I didn't think so.
Dante: But, uh, thank you. For saving my life.
And then Sonny put his arm around Dante and Dante helped his poor, shot daddy out of the elevator. I think we're supposed to be touched by this? If by "touched," they meant the kind of touched where I need to upchuck my lunch because GH has now erased one of the only pieces of joy I have (Dante's disdain for Sonny and his way of life), then I'm deeply touched. How adorable that Dante is going to cover for Sonny's latest crime.
So in conclusion, Ron Carlivati is unarguably a huge failure as the new Head Writer of GH. I kid, I kid! I'm feeling optimism in some areas and disappointment in others, but of course it's far too soon for either. And admittedly I'm giddy about the new promo because if nothing else, it promises that some new life will be breathed into the show.
Familiar or fond of the visiting OLTL crew or not (and yes, I am clearly on record as fond, though this in no way eases the pain of the loss), we can at least all admit we need something new (not named Cassandra). Here's hoping it works!