The Attack of the Overactors
I'm not sure why, exactly, the General Hospital actors have decided to go for broke in terms of over-the-top drama, but go for broke they have--lately it's been all "Eyes bugging out of heads" and "Sneers that require the movement of, literally, every single facial muscle" and "WAAAAAAILS! of EMOOOTION". It's entirely possible that they feel like they need to do something, anything in order to breathe life into a job that requires them to repeat the same lines of dialogue for months at a time. It's also entirely possible, and maybe even probable, that some of these people are just not very good at their jobs. But my favorite theory is that everybody has been watching Bruce Weitz intently and jealously, as he tossed chairs and primal screamed and contorted his face like he was Claymation, biding their time until they had the chance to inject such crazy into routine conversation.
They took their chances this week and ran with them!
Sonny: NO, I could NOT talk to you earlier. Look....it doesn't matter, it was BAD...[...]timing..Okay, tell your guy to stay om him. LISTEN TO ME [Licks lips for an extended period of time]--don't worry about THAT, because I got a PRETTY GOOD IDEA how to deal with him.
Shawn: Move on with your life.
Carly: That's what I'm trying to do!
Shawn: Then sign the divorce papers and move on with your life once and for all.
Carly: [Contorts her face into a sneer so terrifying that her next line of dialogue may well have been "I want to disembowel you and dance on your grave"]
Steve: [Physically attacks a vending machine while screaming unintelligibly]
Steve, winded like he ran a marathon and RAGEY: UGH. I did EVERYTHING I could to SAVE him and give him his LIFE BACK. But you know, after a point, it's OUT OF MY HANDS. At least that's what I TELL myself.
So what has everyone so up in arms? Well, Sonny is angry...I could probably end the sentence there, couldn't I? Sonny is always angry. This time about Jax...ish?
Carly, meanwhile, had the wind knocked out of her when Kate (gleefully! I've been lukewarm to cold on the recast of Kate, likely because I am a Megan Ward mega-fan and have been having a prolonged tantrum about the choice to recast, but Kelly Sullivan has been perfect in all of her scenes with Carly, I have to admit) informed her that Jax gave her his share of the Metro Court making them the worst (and by that I mean BEST, because an antagonistic Kate and a hate-filled Carly are like music to my ears) business partners of all time. She raged at Kate, she raged at Shawn, she whined a lot and eventually angrily gave Kate an ultimatum about filling Sonny in about the truth behind this business deal and can I interrupt myself for a second? The way that characters discuss how controlling and prone to anger Sonny is is seriously creepy when you consider that he's the show's leading man.
Kate: An opportunity presented itself.
Olivia: In the form of Jasper Jax? A man who chased Sonny out of town, trying to kill him? [Say what? --Ed.]
Kate: That's all over now.
Olivia: Oh, no, it's not, Connie. You know Sonny doesn't give up on stuff. Oh, god, you haven't even told Sonny you saw Jax yet.
Kate: I haven't had the time.
Olivia: Because you know how he's going to react! He's going to think you betrayed him with Jax, just like Brenda did.
Like, Olivia is filled with terror on behalf of her cousin that she barely even likes. That's how prone to flying completely off the handle Sonny is. So romantic!
And Steve...well, he's mad about nearly losing an innocent patient and naturally, this led to a long (so long) and vague (SO VAGUE) conversation with Maggie about the illegal thing that they did in Memphis. Someone died! And maybe they should have turned themselves in? But then they wouldn't be able to be doctorly and life-saving. It went on for years--the conversation, I mean, not the events of the illegal thing they won't talk about except to talk about it incessantly. There aren't even words to describe how uninterested I am in this story, or how angry I am that it has taken precedence over things like, I don't know, ROBIN'S EXIT STORYLINE.
Watching this show is often exhausting, seriously.