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« Generally Happy | Main | Trial of the Century! Or, You Know, the Day. »

April 12, 2012

The Long and the Repetitive

It's remarkable that a show with only eighteen minutes of content each day can feel so endless. I generally watch on the CBS website so I can see the little progress bar at the bottom of the picture and on the days that are exclusively Hope/Liam/Steffy-oriented, that thing practically slows to a dead halt. A commercial will come on and I will celebrate the end, only to notice there are still two segments to go. Yesterday was one of those days. Yet another episode about how Steffy, Liam, and Hope are all tedious and annoying people, but for some reason I doubt that was the intention on any front. I'm pretty sure we're supposed to see this as a super-exciting triangle about which there will be internet fan wars for decades to come. Count me out, please!

First, we had Liam doing his usual thing, which was touching and hugging and giving flirtatious and warm glances to the woman he is allegedly not with right now, and confiding in her about incredibly inappropriate information about someone he knows to be her romantic rival. (That's sort of all we need to know to understand that [a] he does not really love or respect either woman and [b]he is a total douchebag and in no way worth a triangle. Right? RIGHT?)

Steffy

And Steffy launched into some of her trademark manipulation and Liam once again fell for all of it hook, line, and sinker. (Y'all, one day I dream that a man will be so in love with me that all he'll ever need to be totally convinced he's wrong about me is one conversation with someone with a known agenda! Men whose minds can be changed about major life issues in one conversation every single day of the week are super-dreamy, right?)

Steffy: Liam, I've said this a billion times. You know, she's a Logan, and they all have issues. She complicated your life before, and she's doing it again. I hate seeing this happen to you. I really do. [Because as we'll all recall, Liam's life with Steffy was super low-maintenance and complication-free! --Ed.]

Liam

"Golly gee, she has a point! I did have an argument with my girlfriend, I guess her whole family must be insane!"

Steffy2
"Of course she's insane! THE LOGANS ARE EVIL AND INSANE BECAUSE I AM INCAPABLE OF CONTEXTUALIZING ANYTHING ANY OTHER WAY WHICH TOTALLY MAKES THEM INSANE!"

Liam: Hope wants to talk.

Steffy: She probably feels bad about the way she treated you. Liam, she's unstable. [Says the woman who practically drove herself off a cliff over her parents not remarrying for the twenty-seventh time. --Ed.] She hasn't learned how to deal with life.

Liam: I just want some answers.

Steffy: Well, you know, um...you may not get them.

Liam: Yeah, but it was one disagreement. I mean, I don't want to overreact.

Steffy: And I don't want her to hurt you again. Oh look, you, um -- you know that I would never walk away from you. I mean, you filed for divorce, and, uh... (chuckles) I'm still wearing my ring. Some people, they may not-- they may not get that, but, um, that's how much I believe in us. Hope's a sweet girl, but it happened all over again -- the complications, the drama. [Says famously No-Drama Steffy!  --Ed.] Where's the smile? Cha-cha-cha! [It keeps happening, make it stop! --Ed.] Keep an open mind.

Where have we seen that scene before? Oh yeah, I remembered. ALL OF THE EPISODES EVER.

And then the big actualmoment in this episode was undoubtedly meant to be Hope confessing to Liam the terrible sin of going to therapy and getting a prescription. Why oh why could they not have given this character a shred of rootability but having her turn a little more fun after the fans and paparazzi got to her by just shutting up about being a role model, deciding it was ridiculous to equate a fashion line with virginity, and just telling the world that she changed her damn mind!

Hope

Oh yeah. 'Cause she's Hope and it's this show. Instead, we need to be subjected to her self-flagellation over losing her virginity. (I swear right here and now that if Caroline Part II, who already seems just as bland and pure as Hope, turns out to be a virgin as well I will scream. I hope she turns out to be some wild party girl. This show seems to have a little trouble finding ground between young women who are pure and squeaky-clean and boring and young women who are trouble-makers and manipulative and scheming and dangerous. Hey Bill Bell! There's a whole spectrum of women out there between angelic and evil! Complexity is interesting!) (I realize he thinks he's making Hope all complex by giving her this drug addiction, but when it's an addiction to prescription pills that were then replaced by possibly-laced-with-something online pills totally unbeknownst to her, it sort of undermines her culpability and removes her agency once again making this REALLY BORING.)

Speaking of which, I once again found Amber of all people to be the most compellingly written character yesterday. What the what? Seriously, her scenes with Hope were very entertaining as she was trying (and failing) to play the role of supportive friend but had no idea how to do it -- so instead, she just kept waiting for Hope to make a declaration or decision and then immediately jumped in with a, "Yeah, yeah, I was about to say that's exactly what you should do!"

See? I had something nice to say! It's not easy with this storyline.

Comments

Omg...I swear to Christ if I ever hear the phrase "if only Steffy would sign the annulment papers (sigh)" again, I am going to go insane!!! Also really pissing me off is the furrowed brow look Brooke is sporting 24/7. Ahhhh, I feel better now, thanks for letting me vent. I would play the drinking game for either or both of the mentioned items, but, my kids would come home from school to find me passed out every day. Watching the pocket poodle from the other day take a dump would be more entertaining these days.

That's sort of all we need to know to understand that [a] he does not really love or respect either woman and [b]he is a total douchebag and in no way worth a triangle. Right? RIGHT?

I swear, the only likeable thing I can find about Liam is that he looks an awful lot like Skyler Joplin and Dillon Quartermaine... which does a lot more to make me like him than the writing does!

The most likeable thing about Liam is that stupidity is better than oily smugness (Bill...for many years, Ridge), and he looks good sans shirt.

I'm trying to get back into the show because GH and Y&R suck so much and DAYS is all over the place, but overall the best part is the beautiful LA stock footage in every episode.

Liam, she's unstable. [Says the woman who practically drove herself off a cliff over her parents not remarrying for the twenty-seventh time. --Ed.]

---------------

LMAO here! The look on Steffy's face in the third recap is priceless. What a loser. And Lame is practically more stupid than i gave him credit for. He is officially Rapist Ridge Jr.

Someone mentioned Steffy almost driving off a cliff? Did that really happen? Or just wishful thinking...although I do prefer her to Mope and the constant hand wringing.

I really, sincerely hope that all three of these charaters(Hope/Liam/Steffy) fall off that stupid mountain when they do that location shoot in Aspen supposedly happening in early May. Where are the serial killers in the population when you really need them?

Why does Hope's hair look like Cousin Itt's from the Addam's Family? Is that a side effect of taking online drugs?

Hope's hair is all matted from her tumble in the pool. Verisimilitude! For once. But it seems like she could take a comb to it now that she went back to work.

Yikes... I'm going to actually have to start paying attention before I post. Sigh.

Thanks for hairification (hair clairification)
post, Louise.

Someone mentioned Steffy almost driving off a cliff? Did that really happen?

-------------------------------

I vaguely remember it. Wish the outcome was different.

Apparently, the show has gotten a lot of positive viewer feedback regarding this triangle. I don't get it. B&B used to understand the slow build. Now everything happens instantly. Part of the reason I cannot take this seriously is that the show moved Steffy and to a lesser degree Hope from partner to partner in such a short time that it's impossible for me to take any character's love for another one seriously. And now the setup for what looks to be Rick/Caroline/Thomas is happening at lightning speed. I'm sure if Bell doesn't get instant results, he'll drop it. Which will damage the credibility of the next insta-connection. Wasn't Thomas proposing to Hope a few weeks ago?

Thanks Pinky. Me too, me too. Is it really evil of me to wish 'Mope' overdoses? ? Probably.

lol. No it doesnt make you evil. If so i am also evil for wanting Rapist, ThomASS, Lame and Slutty to disappear.

After yesterday's poor excuse for a show, maybe we can all chip in and send a trained parrot to Hope that will sit on her shoulder and sqwak "SIGN THE PAPERS! SIGN THE PAPERS! " every time it sees Steffy, thus leaving both of Mope's hands free for pill popping! Just a thought ....

omg, i have no word for this shitstorm, but your recaps and screencaps are priceless! never miss!

We grow neither better nor worse as we grow old but more like ourselves.

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