Thanks for Nothin'!
Boy, remember last week when I was over the moon about Duke's return, and the possibilities of a reunion I've waited almost an entire quarter century for?
I'm sorry to say this, but I would have rather he stayed dead.
Duke: The only woman I want to hear you talk about is Corinthos's daughter. And when you talk about her I want to hear only three words: SHE IS DEAD.
No. It's just not. I just don't. This is another impostor. Look, I'm totally fine with Duke being a gray-area kind of guy -- it makes sense with his introduction story back in the 80s (though not his departure story, thankyouverymuch), and they dominate this show. But having a teenage girl murdered? Nope. He wouldn't. Not in a million years. I don't care what kind of torture he was subjected to in his Turkish prison or who he's evolved into, it wouldn't be this. It wouldn't. Not in a billion trillion years. Running a scam on Sonny? No problem-o. Having innocent young women offed in order to do so? BIG PROBLEM-O.
So unless this was part of some long con in which Duke knew all along Kristina couldn't possibly die (NOTE TO DAYTIME TELEVISION PROGRAM: I WILL ACCEPT THAT IF IT'S THE CASE, PLEASE JUST TELL ME SOON!), I will be pretending this effing storyline doesn't exist because seriously. This is not bringing irrelevant Irene Manning back and turning her into a supervillain over on OLTL. This is bringing one half of a beloved supercouple back and turning him into a malicious child killer. So what was the point? No fucking thank you.
Damn. Way to ruin many months of good will.
On a saner note:
- Luke appeared to have been drinking red wine at dinner? Off the wagon, just a little? Am I just overthinking it?
- Florencia Lozano would have just crushed me and broken my heart today if my heart hadn't already been shattered into a million pieces (see above).
- Speaking of getting more mileage out of gray-area characters, can Britt ease up and just be kinda bitchy and not totally a cartoon? I'm ready now.
- Shut it, Luke. Anna wasn't your girlfriend before Duke returned, so why does she owe you anything now?
- Daniel Edward is a good name for the baby, and imagine my relief that Sam's original plan of "Jason" has become a distant memory.