Ho Ho Ho-ly Goodness, This Show Is Amazing
Everything you could have ever wanted in an episode of television happened on Friday's episode of General Hospital. I don't mean advances in plot or character development, because the show was about as filler-y as a filler episode can get and those things were just...not there.
No, I meant Tracy Quartermaine wearing a Santa hat for the duration of the episode.
The only other way you might be able to answer that question is "Lots of sweet and snarky Lucy Coe action". And for so many years, the possibility of that ever happening was more than an impossibility, so you've probably trained yourself out of even hoping for it. But this show had that, too!
Lucy: No, wait a minute. I do not need to leave. I used to be, for your
information, the lady of this house.
Monica: Oh, you belong in a house, all right. But not for ladies.
Monica: Well, then kiss my 99% assets and get the hell out of here.
Lucy: You know you're losing out. You need that makeover, by the way.
Really, they could have condensed the episode to a few Tracy Claus one-liners and shots of smirking Lucy (guys, she offered Monica a de-puffer! And it took on a whole new meaning with Leslie Charleson looking...you know what, I'm in a good mood so I am not going to go there, but I AM going to raise an eyebrow archly and give you all a knowing look) and I would have been screaming "EMMY SUBMISSION EPISODE! ALL TIME CLASSIC! EXCLAMATION POINT, EXCLAMATION POINT, EXCLAMATION POINT!" because really.
Although if they had condensed the episode to just Tracy and Lucy, I would have missed the following thirty seconds of things that I also enjoyed to a much lesser degree:
- AJ and Michael's brief coat mixup actually made me say "Aww!" What has happened to me?! I feel like I used to have biting wit, but I've become all ooey gooey and starry eyed. I blame my burgeoning crush on Sean Kanan and the fact that my blood is probably 84% peppermint hot chocolate these days. It's making me all nice!
- Kelly Monaco deserves some serious credit for being able to convincingly convey "annoyance" at the sight of Tracy, when the logical reaction is to clap and squeal.
- I am coveting Carly's cardigan.
- I didn't love Carly and Connie-Kate's verbal sparring, but it didn't not entertain me, either. Carly's regression into a petulant high schooler worked for me with her dramatic eyerolls.
Carly: Then how come every single time I mention your name to Johnny, he cringes? He clenches his teeth, trying not to throw up.
I only wish she had used the term "ralph", because I would have laughed for days.
And I do have to give Connie-Kate props for her sense of humor.
Connie: Carly, you might want to get that checked out. Hearing voices is a sign of mental illness.
Carly: You would know.
Connie, seriously: I would know.
Plus, movement on the Nurse's Ball! It's almost all fantastic, which is something my fingers are still uncomfortable typing...