I'm Not Laughing At Myself Now (or I'm Always Laughing At Myself)
Y'all, I just sat down and pressed "play" on the DVR so I could watch today's General Hospital and the first few scenes involved Tracy and Lucy and Anna and Frisco and Felicia and Mac and Kevin and Laura and Scott and... I mean seriously? This is the fanfic that was happening in my head a couple of years ago that I never dared utter aloud because I was already laughing at myself on the inside for what an idiot I was for even thinking about those characters, much less fantasizing about an episode featuring all of them.
And now here they are.
So I figured what the heck, I'll take the journey of the rest of this episode in public. Or however public Serial Drama really is. My dog is sitting next to me giving me a very judgy look for doing this, so be warned that some of what follows may be couched in deep shame somehow. How does someone who spends most of her life licking her own butt make me feel self-conscious?
Right, so Luke is yelling at Scotty and accusing him of having sent Lulu the fake Ice Princess. I'm loving Laura's darker hair color.
Lucy is filling Tracy in on all her recent shenanigans.
At the Floating Rib, Mac is encouraging Kevin to go back to Lucy. Felicia gets a call or a text and rushes out, pretending she had to go meet a friend. Mac knows she's full of it but doesn't call her out. For now.
Frisco is offering condolences to Anna about Robin.
Y'all. FRISCO AND ANNA ARE IN A SCENE TOGETHER ON MY SCREEN AND THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT ROBIN. I die.
Frisco: I was so sorry to hear about Robin. She was such a bright light in all of our lives. I just think of that 6-year-old little girl that captured my heart. I'm sorry she's gone.
Oh, my heart! (Jack Wagner looks like he's wearing a little too much of the pancake makeup today, though. It's just a little... weird. Am I seeing things?) They chat about the whole Duke Masked Faison incident and whether or not Duke and Anna's relationship will always be tainted as a result. Frisco, in case anyone worried there would be a question, thinks that Duke and Anna have incredibly chemistry and he's totally a 'shipper. Anna sees something beyond Frisco and she starts beaming. Cut to: Duke, coming out of the elevator doors, beaming even more at her! I'm 12, I'm 12! (And remember how cool it was when elevator doors were just Duke's apartment door at his penthouse? Yeah, yeah, Sonny had that later but it doesn't count.)
Kate is apologizing to Sonny. She wants to start a new life and she hopes he'll be part of it because she loves him. Well, Kate, he'll pretty much stick with you and your alters through anything at this point, and he's really the best you're going to do. So you know, good call?
Luke is trying to convince Laura that Scotty is here to get revenge on Lulu for offing Logan.
Spinelli visits Ellie at work and sees that she's working on analyzing the Pickle Lila ingredients.
Lucy wants to get more details on Tracy's plans, but is bummed to hear that Duke is on the "enemy's side" because he's so rogueishly charming and has that hot accent. She's still wearing Emily's outfit from Wyndemere. She has a lot to take care of from saving ELQ and CoeCoe Cosmetics and bringing back the Nurses Ball to winning back Kevin.
Said rogueishly charming gentleman with a hot accent is sitting down with Anna, laying on the aforementioned charm.
Felicia goes to the MetroCourt bar, where Frisco is having himself a beverage.
Sonny apologizes to Kate for banging her alter, and he just uses all the cliches that men always use when apologizing for sleeping with their fiancée's other personality. Please, Sonny, we've heard all these lines before!
Anna is concerned about her judgment, and Duke tells her she must keep fighting the good fight because she is a role model for young women everywhere, especially Emma. (HAS HE MET EMMA? CAN WE HAVE SOME DUKE/EMMA SCENES PLEASE PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE?) And Duke slides a jewelry box across the table.
Mac fills Kevin in on the Frisco/Felicia business. Mac thinks she is falling for Frisco's act. Meanwhile, Felicia is laying down the law and telling Frisco he better get out of town.
Luke and Scott and Laura bicker. Scott's sure Luke is just jealous of Laura's and his relationship. Things get heated and Luke takes off. Laura insists to Scott that Luke isn't jealous because he's happy with Anna. Anna, who is opening a heart pendant from Duke. She won't accept it because she knows he can't afford it, and gets a little concerned as to what he's up to when he insists he most certainly can.
Spinelli is asking a lot of questions of Ellie regarding the relish, as he's on Tracy's payroll to do recon work on it. The relish. That's a real thing on this --
WHOA. Frisco and Felicia flashbacks! FRISCO AND FELICIA FLASHBACKS! I might just turn into a puddle right here. Oh my god they were so cute. Oh my god they were so hot. Flashbacks to Georgie's conception! Wedding flashbacks!
And Frisco tells Felicia that he remembers today is Georgie's birthday.
Kate and Sonny forgive each other make up and all is forgotten. He thinks she should get a good doctor, but she just "wants [him]." So you know, no doctors "today." So you know, Connie back by tomorrow. Anyway then they get it on. And really:
I love it.
Mac tells Kevin he's not going to give Felicia a hard time about Frisco and that if she wants him (Mac), she'll come to him. And Kevin should take the same approach with Lucy, who shows up right at that moment!
Felicia is surprised that Frisco remembered it was Georgie's birthday. He acknowledges that he wasn't any kind of father at all, and that he should have been there for his family. He was afraid to come back and face Felicia and Maxie because he thinks if he'd been a father, Georgie would still be alive. Felicia's kind of crushing me here, y'all. Big, heavy stuff and I'm trying real hard to just be snarky and blow it off but the history of these scenes compounded by knowing that Jack Wagner and Kristina Wagner once had a marriage and a family and are now divorced and share children and what must this feel like for them and... oof. Gettin' a little choked up.
Luke complains to Tracy about Scott.
Duke has elbow patches on his suit jacket! He is too cute. He puts the new pendant on Anna. He tells her he wants to start a new chapter of Duke and Anna. And they kiss!
They kiss they kiss they kiss!
Oh yeah, and Scott and Laura walk in and see it.
But that's hardly the important part!
Kate wakes up in bed with Sonny and hears voices. Connie's voice, presumably.
Spinelli wants to know if Ellie could clue him in on the relish recipe since he's always been so interested in pickling. As one would be. But she insists that she must keep the secret!
Laura is worried that Anna is cheating on Luke (why worry, Laura, haven't we been told for years that he cheated on you all the time and it was no biggie because fidelity is for squares, man? And Luke Spencer is a renegade who can't be tied down by bourgeois values like loyalty and commitment, man?), but also wonders if perhaps they're actually just not together anymore.
The waiter tells Duke that his cash is counterfeit and they can't accept it. Embarrassing! Oh Tracy, you rapscallion, you!
Frisco leaves Felicia a jewelry box and gives her some time alone. It's a locket and she has a "lady of my heart" flashback to Frisco's mullet.
Naturally, the new locket also has "Lady of My Heart" inscribed in it, which makes poor Felicia burst into tears. Because she loves him and she misses him but she knows it's so wrong! (Okay, I might be getting a little over-involved here...)
Lucy, who is finally out of Dead Emily's clothes and into her own, apologizes to Kevin and tells him she is truly, madly, deeply in love with him. She promises to never mention the word "vampire" again. And he pulls a total 1980s soap move.
Kevin: Lucy. Shut up and kiss me!
Kate's wandering around in Sonny's house and is startled to see Connie in the mirror.