Happy Anniversary, General Hospital! Thank You For Being Generally Awesome
I cannot begin to express my delight at General Hospital turning 50 and celebrating the big anniversary with an episode so wonderful and sentimental and yet filled with just the right amount of hilarity that I spent almost the entire hour in tears of the devastated sort, the weepily nostalgic sort and the giddy with laughter sort. I spent an excessive amount of time attempting to coin a megaword combining basically every excitable adjective in the English language for this exact purpose, but I came up empty. Just know that I am very, very delighted.
Not just at the quality of the anniversary episode (although it was top-notch and if you haven't watched it yet, please do so IMMEDIATELY, like what are you waiting for? I also suggest watching it with tissues on standby in case you, like a hypothetical soap blogger who shall remain nameless because she--or he!--is purely hypothetical, tear up easily at things that are both happy and sad. And maybe have some candy close to you as well in case you need to talk to some food about your feelings. And you will have feelings. Many feelings!) but at this anniversary in general. 50 years! That's all kinds of impressive. Over the two decades that I've been watching (Holy goodness, that makes me feel positively ancient), General Hospital has been part of many happy memories of mine, starting when I began to watch because of my soap-loving Aunt Lisa, who is basically the world's coolest person (you guys, she had the best Caboodle FILLED with makeup. Coolest ever!). I watched on the phone with my best friend throughout middle school and by that I mean that we spent the hour in complete silence unless a commercial break came on and then all you'd hear was high-pitched "Oh my god can you believe THAT just happened?". I bonded with girls in college and girls at work and started this blog with Becca because we figured that our emails about our all-consuming hatred of Sonny Corinthos were too hilarious to be confined to a thread on gmail and then we met all of YOU wonderful readers and the ever amazing Stephanie Sloane at Soap Opera Digest who offered us a column (which STILL freaks me out) and then the most excellent Louise and I could go on and on, but the point I tried to make about a hundred words ago is that I am happy that this show exists and I hope it is around for many more years, especially if it means that every five or ten years, we get a celebratory episode like this one. Let's all buy stock in Kleenex now!
You've all been reading this blog long enough to know that I really do get teary-eyed very easily and it's true; I was going to make a list of things in today's show that made me cry but it was almost all of them. And even the thing that didn't make me cry from joy or nostalgia made me cry tears of annoyance. So actually all of it made me teary, from start to finish!
Even just looking at this picture of Steve Hardy got me all mushy and that was in the show's opening seconds, so you can imagine the mess I was by the time the hour was over.
I cried during Liz and Audrey's talk and Audrey's ADORABLE flashback to her and Steve dancing.
And I flat out wept when Audrey kissed the picture of Steve.
Audrey: You're my rock of Gibraltar.
I cried when Jax appeared looking handsomer than ever (and had flashbacks of my own to the good old days of 1996 when, as far as I was concerned, Ingo Rademacher ranked only just below Leonardo DiCaprio in terms of human perfection).
I cried when Jax demonstrated that he loved Josslyn THIS MUCH because it's just too cute.
I cried at how impossibly beautiful Vanessa Marcil is.
I cried at the face Carly made when she heard that Brenda and Jax are engaged because I know I will have to wait 24 hours to see her full reaction to this news and I don't know that I have it in me. I want the temper tantrum NOW!
Carly: You're engaged? To who?
Sonny: You're engaged? To who?
Did anyone else SCREAM? I made a sound similar to Olive in Little Miss Sunshine. It was completely undignified and more than a little embarrassing, which makes my willingness to share it in public with all of you a little bizarre, but we have no secrets here. I'm totally excited. I know it will probably fall apart and that it only happened because Sonny (who is terrible) didn't read the letter from Brenda and basically forced her to move on but you know what? For this shining moment, I am going to just pretend that Jax and Brenda are FINALLY getting their happily ever after. Please allow me this brief period of smug gloating.
I cried when the person under the hood was revealed to be Ethan, because I had really hoped it was Lucky. Why wasn't it Lucky?!
Was anyone in the world REALLY clamoring for Ethan? "You know, I am understanding FAR too much of what people are saying on this show lately. What I wouldn't give for a mumbler!" Please stop pretending to be a part of things, Ethan!
I cried when Stuart Damon appeared.
Monica: I've never been so happy!
Alan: You're about to be happier.
Emily: Hi, Mom.
You guys. I could not even deal. So many tears (and so many more tears cried--again!--over the complete waste that her murder was. EMILY FREAKING QUARTERMAINE WAS KILLED OFF AS A CHEAP SWEEPS STUNT. I mean, WHAT? She could have driven story for DECADES. UGH. WASTE!). Also, she's so freaking pretty.
I loved the snark between her and Tracy; how very Tracy Q to not let a niece visiting from the freaking afterlife not get in the way of her acid tongue.
Tracy: Really, Alan? You couldn't have brought Mother or Daddy back from the great beyond? You had to bring Monica's adopted waif?
Monica: You did not just go there!
Emily: It's good to see you, too, Aunt Tracy.
I also adored the little touches during these scenes: the little smile and knowing look Alan shot at Emily during all of the squabbling, the way Alan and Emily finished Monica's favorite phrase ("This is my house! Alan gave it to me!") along with her, the way that Stuart Damon rolled his eyes when he shook Rick Webber's hand.
Oh, yeah, that's right, Rick also came back to see Monica.
Tracy: A long line of infidelities, starting with Rick Webber!
Rick: Oh, no, no, don't drag me into this.
So that was something! His Extreme Makeover: Heaven Edition was also something.
The three of them forcing Monica and Tracy to call a truce was adorable. And it worked!
Tracy: Su casa es me casa?!
Monica: Don't push it.
And watching the two of them try to hug each other was amazing.
Why do the Daytime Emmys not have a category for Best Disgusted Hug?! This would be a unanimous victory!
There was probably more that made me cry and I am sure more will happen this week that will necessitate tissues by my side, always. But in a word (1200 words later)? Delightful. Just...delightful.