Heaven! I'm In Heaven
All right, General Hospital, you won. Don't go around being all smug about it because that's just poor sportsmanship but I can admit it: you bested me.
Because I was prepared to rage. I was SO prepared--I mean, granted, I could write this particular rant with my eyes closed because I've been shouting it, angrily, from the rooftops for so many years. But I was prepared! I had a list of insults ready to go and I was all set to type them angrily and wordily and my words were going to be bitter and full of hatred.
Olivia: Now, if Franco was threatening my kid, I would have done exactly the same thing. I might have kicked his ass myself. So to answer your question, no...I'm not going to turn you in.
Sonny: Thank you.
Olivia: I'm on your side, Sonny. Don't you know that.
Sonny: I do now.
Did you not hear a record scratching sound effect like you are the quirky heroine of a 90s era dramedy? I mean, what? WHAT? WHAT? Is she for real? Did I just have a seizure? Did we all have a seizure at the same time and for some reason hallucinated such a bizarre and unrealistic and terrible interaction? How is it that THREATENING Olivia's child is somehow a bridge too far but SHOOTING her child (IN THE CHEST!) is clearly not an impediment to hot, hot making out? I wanted to vomit and then punch this show in the face.
Until the end of the show happened and all I could think was "[High pitched squealing accompanied by semi-hysterical clapping"] and "WHEN WILL IT BE TOMORROW AT 2 PM?!?!" because--did you see the end of today's show?
I love it. I was so surprised and so emotional and am so looking forward to their conversation tomorrow, which I am sure I will cry through, that I am not even going to do my normal complaining about how awful it is that Georgie has to be brought back as a ghost because the show made such a colossal mistake in killing her off--I mean, I will probably do that tomorrow after Maxie and Georgie talk and Kirsten Storms and Lindze Leatherman remind me of their sweet familial chemistry. But TODAY I will not complain. I will only smile all dopey-like.