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« I'm Just Going To Leave This Here... | Main | Summertime and the Living's...Busy »

July 22, 2013

I Cringe At The Thought Of This Child's Future Therapy Bills

It seemed impossible that anybody, let alone another baby, could possibly compete with His Royal Highness, The Baby of Cambridge, for my attention today (I'm very excited about the royal baby. That's not sad, is it? And if it is sad, it's just a little sad, right? He's the future King! And I do so enjoy Duchess Kate and her shiny, shiny hair and pretty wardrobe--a wardrobe, might I add, that contains a handful of outfits very similar to some of mine and I wore them first. I'm sorry, I just have to include that brag whenever I can) but HRH The Prince of Morgan did it without saying a word.  20130722_150927-vi

Have you ever seen a baby so perfectly convey utter weariness at being caught in life or death situations? "All right. Toss me off of a bridge. That's fine. I'm only going to end up in mortal peril again in about a week if you don't, so we might as well just do this."

And there was his award-winning pain during Roger Howarth as James Franco as Franco and Roger Howarth as Steve Burton as Jason with a brain tumor's conversation about their inner monstrousness.

Franco's Hallucination Of Franco: Jason, stop. It's time for you to face the truth. This sickness isn't just in me. It's in you, too. It's in our blood and now it's in the blood of my little nephew. We're killers. That's what we do. Some families are good at music. We get this. You and me and Heather...you should be grateful that Jake never survived.
Franco Who Thinks He's Jason: Shut your mouth.
Franco's Figment Of Freaky Franco: Because he didn't have to turn out like us. But Danny could. You need to end this cycle of pain and misery, Jason, before more people that you love die.
Franco Who Thinks He's Jason: But I love Danny.
Franco, Franco, ACK!: Well, of course you do. That's why it's called a sacrifice. One that I'm sure you're willing to make.

  20130722_150623-vi

He's not picking his nose--he's trying to impale his brain with his little finger, to end his suffering once and for all. Did you not shed a tear? Do you not want to hug and cuddle him and tell him everything is mostly going to be okay or that it's going to be as okay as life for a human being in Port Charles could possibly be and on the bright side, a lot of kidnappings--and even shootings!--in this town wind up being non-fatal, so at least there is that.

It goes without saying that Roger Howarth did a pretty excellent job playing Franco (as played by JameS Franco) and Jason (as played by Steve Burton)--he has their mannerisms down and was blank-faced and robotic when he needed to be and wholly terrifying when the script called for it.

Scary Franco, Yikes: You need to end him and then come down with us.

I screamed. Did anyone else scream? Because all of a sudden I was transported back to seventh grade and reading IT over the summer and it reminded me so clearly of "We all float down here" and even reminiscing through typing is causing my blood to run cold and now I'm pretty sure that there is an evil clown lurking outside my window.

In other news: Morgan and Kiki are engaged and terrible and Michael is going to have a rebound fling with a girl who is such a bad actress that I'm reasonably sure that she won a contest, both of which are quite nearly as horrible as everything noted above.

Comments

I didn't scream but I did find myself holding my breath AND on the edge of my seat through that end part.RH was brilliant and to his naysayers who say he can only play Todd-like characters, I didn't see Todd on my screen at all today.I may never recover from this one. I even found myself saying, "Carly. Thank goodness. The voice of reason." Yes, I actually said that.

Franco vs. Franco was quite entertaining, RH is really so good at imitating both acting styles. And I had to laugh when Franco told "Jason" that Elizabeth was doomed when she set "googly" eyes on him--so true! Jason brought misery and violence to all the women he loved. Sad that that only Franco realizes that being a hitman was not a legitimate career choice.

Girl who won a contest at least won a contest though, unlike KA, who was just brought over TWICE because Valentini doesn't know when some child actresses should be let go.

I miss Jake.

I'm glad Franco told Jason what a horrible person he was. Awful boyfriend, deadbeat dad, killer, he ruined everyones life.

At least Michael called AJ "dad" today. Some of the damage Jason has done can be repaired.

I actually think RH is doing a great job with what he's been given.

It's just that what he's been given is such horrifically awful shit, that his best efforts- or the efforts of any mortal being- cannot possibly be enough to make it NOT horrifically awful shit.

Michael calling AJ "dad" was the show today.

No, he wasn't good. Nobody could be good with that shitty material.

Roger is a good actor, but Roger sucks as Franco et al.

I'd like to see a lawsuit where Roger sues Ron for ... this.

This left me dumbfounded....dumbfounded that after it was written, it was considered good enough to put on screen.

The whole thing was like a demented take on Forrest Gump, if he was cousin to the Texas Chainsaw Massacre Family.

Has Ron C. been infected by the same Prattitis that brought AMC to its knees?

I agree with Deprived - as much as I love RH, I saw nothing of Jason or Franco in these godawful scenes. Possibly Jane Elliott could pull this shit off, but no one else.

As for the royal baby, Mallory! Thank you for your love of Kate and giddiness over the baby. All my FB friends are bored because "who cares about the royals?" but I grew up with Princess Diana and I'm just happy her son is happy. I don't care that it's royalty. So YAY! for the heir!

I kinda of enjoyed these scenes. Not the fact that they were written, or that they were particularly "good" per se, but I found them...entertaining? Watchable? And I'm kind of looking forward to today because I actually like Carly when she's not in hypocrite/sonny apologist mode.
Then again, the bar exam is in one week (GH is my afternoon study break) and it's possible my brain is as broken as Franco's.

My 16 year old neighbor said that the only way Carly would ever bang Jason again was to do his twin brother, Franco.

Yes to the royal baby! Seeing the photos of Will, Kate and little Cambridge-- and the dress Kate chose to greet the world's press was the highlight of my (admittedly long and boring) work day. I commend you of your style, I your style is similar to hers. She has a great eye for clothes. I loved what she wore today. Is anyone else in awe of Kate's ability to be totally calm and relaxed and all 'oh, hey world's press, what's up? Nice weather, right?' no matter how crazy said press gets? If I were Kate Middleton, I'd be going: 'wait, how many people are waiting outside for me again? How many steps do I have to walk down? While being photographed by about 1,000 news outlets? Please don't let me trip. I am never wearing heels while carrying this baby again!"

(This is perhaps why marrying the future prince of England was not my destiny in life, but if Harry wants to know, I am fond of redheaded men who play polo, so I'm willing to make an exception for him. Anyway-)

I love these screenshots of 'Baby Danny'. Oh my goodness, cutest kid ever! I did want to both hug and cuddle him!

correction" "I commend you for your style, if your style is similar to hers."

That was originally meant to be in English, I swear, haha!

I'm with Deprived and boes. And HA! to this "The whole thing was like a demented take on Forrest Gump, if he was cousin to the Texas Chainsaw Massacre Family."

So true!

This is dreck and Roger's acting is dreck and yesterday's show was dreck and today's show was dreck and it's getting worse and will keep getting worse. I'm embarrassed. Ron thinks soaps are a joke. He has to, otherwise why the Passions-like material? At least Passions knew it was a joke, GH used to have some heart to it. It's no longer the 80s and yet Ron still lives on big hair, shoulder pads and aliens.

Linda Evans is not amused.

If what Roger's doing is "good acting", then Dawson Leery deserved an Emmy for the scenes of Joey choosing Pacy.

I'm a Roger fan, but I will not cosign this dreck. If this were my first exposure to him, no way would I be a fan of his. It's like "Tommy" to the Nth power. Ugh.

You know what made me scream? FrancoJason transported Danny ON A MOTORCYCLE. Honestly.

If this type of story has to be played, it should have been played long ago with Jason Morgan warring with the Jason Quartermaine side of himself. Then maybe I could care. Not that I cared much about Jason...but at least that was a legacy character. This made-up FrankenToddson-is-a-Quartermaine means nothing to me. I didn't know Todd from OLTL. I grew to like him a bit on GH but I'm not a big enough fan to want to sit and watch his monologue or watch Carly talk him down from the bridge. I see this whole storyline as a big showcase for Roger Howarth. At least for now, the characters I want to see that have longtime ties to GH are glorified extras. Maybe someday I can get on board with this character after he is "cured". I'm not giving up now (viewer since the early 1970's) although I am skeptical but I'll wait and see how this plays out. Right now I don't recognize the show sometimes and I've had enough of FrankenToddson.

Bad day yesterday. Got home, turned on GH, asking myself all the while "Why am I watching this again?" And then I saw Franco as Jason with Jason's leather jacket, gun, baby, and MOTORCYCLE (how the hell do you drive a motorcycle if you're clutching a baby in one arm?) The only thing missing was Jason's Secret Box of Pain! Oh, I laughed and laughed. This is so terrible, but it's so much more entertaining than Sabrina the Teenaged Bore or Kiki and Morgan or Luke.

Next on GH! Carly has a brain tumor and thinks she's Lila! Sonny has a brain tumor and thinks he's human! STAY TUNED!

Just kidding - not true - at least not yet....but right now NOTHING would surprise me on this show.

Also, are they really trying to imply that Jerry is Sam's father? Do they understand that that will mean Sam was banging her uncle?

" Also, are they really trying to imply that Jerry is Sam's father? Do they understand that that will mean Sam was banging her uncle?"

Ewww! Not to mention, that at some point under Guza's regime Jerry was trying to blackmail Sam into sleeping with him. This show was so good for awhile. What happened?

someone needs to tell Ron to grow up. His tweets ,he is asking for people to tell him what they think so he can ban them? I want to get a tweet account just to tell him the show stinks.
As for the show with ROHO enough. francoToddason was something I am not sure I saw I just zoned out ,turned out and went on the computer. I love the twins that play Danny The child is adorable. I am sick to death of the RoHo show when I saw him talking to himself, calling Liz names. What is it with Ron insulting the actors??is he ten and a mean girl. between that, calling AJ fat, and picking on teenage boys who have the nerve to voice their opinion on twitter. Someone needs to rein him in.

Open your eyes Pennywise has been chilling at GH Since Feb 2012 aka Ron C with a side of Frank n Beans.

You are correct tho I do find most "horror" to be comedic.

It was scary this is just cringeworthy and not worth watching.

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