Brief Musings on Nashville: We've Got Things To Do
Episode 217 of Nashville, otherwise known as "The Night Teddy Was Interesting For Eight Seconds."
But I wouldn't want to disappoint anyone who really only comes in to share in my dislike of Scarlett, so let's start with a photo journey of how annoying she was this week, and it was really more to do with her hairstyles and pouty face than anything else:
I mean they were really just taunting us Scarlett-haters with those braids and that douchey headband, weren't they? That was clearly just to bother us.
Meanwhile, Teddy has gone full-scale cheesy-soap guy and is now cornering Deacon's lawyer girlfriend (who still does not have a personality meritorious of a name) and telling her how she feels about him and how he just knows she can't stop thinking about him and their backseat sexcapades. If they were interesting characters or had any chemistry or anything, this might even be entertaining! It's not, but I did get a kick out of Teddy being so corny and ridiculous (made all the more amusing by the incongruity with his concurrent "having trouble disciplining his teen daughter" storyline, because that actually makes it a "having trouble disciplining his teen daughter while also trying to seduce the girlfriend of said teen daughter's biological father" storyline) (when she finds out what he's up to she's really going to fully convert to the "Deacon's my REAL dad!" camp, that's for sure).
Juliette has signed with Rayna's label! Hurrah! Except not hurrah, because Rayna wants to take things slowly and come up with a good strategy for getting the information out there since Juliette continues to be persona non grata with country music fans (all of their hysterical scowls and head-shaking at the sight of her cracked me up no end). So of course Juliette got competitive when she wasn't getting enough attention, so she went ahead and did her typical damage by completely overstepping and announcing her contract to a party full of people.
Rayna was not pleased.
Rayna decided to do damage control by having Juliette perform a duet with her at the Opry, a strategy that made zero sense to me. The audience was hostile, perhaps mostly because Juliette decided to repair her image by wearing an outfit that looked like it was assembled in the "fancy" section of a Kmart.
I'm clearly not the demographic a character like her is looking to please, though, so who knows. Maybe that top is awesome. I accept and concede that subcultural relativity may indeed be at play here.
Nonetheless, it bombed and she had the sads. Who knew that people who hate her wouldn't magically stop hating her because she performed a duet with her new producer?! WHERE DID THEY GO WRONG.
Juliette also had to kick Will and Layla off her tour, which led to Will getting invited onto Luke's tour (which will now also involve Deacon, so that'll be drama) and Layla being left to buy "spice up your sex life" toys at Nashville's version of Babeland and basically get dumped. Dumped until Brent (dammit, Brent! fight for your man!) pointed out to Will that rumors are starting to spread and the worst thing he can do is break up with Layla. Naturally since Will is a really stable and thoughtful individual, this led to him proposing to Layla.
Will! No! It's one thing to stay in the closet for the sake of a career, but it's another entirely to ruin another human being's life to do it. Thankfully from the previews it looks like this story is going to rev up a bit in the next episode (and Gunnar calls him out on how cruel this is), where my wishes will be granted and Will will tell the world who he is and totally spearhead a whole new wildly popular genre of queer country music. Right?