Devious Maids: Bad Girl
Deepest apologies for missing a few episodes of recaps. My Monday schedule has gotten insane.
Let's do this! I hope I keep all the names straight, this show is getting complicated. In all the ways I like. So far.
Adrian is home from the hospital and is highly suspicious of Evelyn's kindness. Evelyn insists she has been kind to him at least a few times before! Evelyn trots in Deon, the boy she adopted, I guess?
Carmen is filling the girls in on Jacklyn's surprise smooch. Carmen, because she's Carmen, is pretty convinced Jacklyn is in love with her. Zoila wants a demonstration of the kiss, which Carmen plants on Rosie.
It's not not hot, is all I'll say.
Marisol and Taylor chat about Taylor's marriage, but she shuts down the conversation quickly.
Adrian is skeptical about this adoption, and learns that he's their foster child for now. "Lease to buy," says Evelyn, who then compares Deon to a Lexus. Because she's Evelyn. She then suggests the boy could become the next Barack Obama, which Adrian does not consider a plus.
Genevieve's boyfriend (whose name I forget for now) has been rearranging the kitchen and Zoila is not pleased. He tells her that he's her boss now.
Doctor Boyfriend should learn quickly not to mess with Zoila.
Taylor asks Rosie to help out with babysitting Katy more now that Michael's gone. Just as she's praising Rosie's wonderful parenting skills, since clearly Miguel is a living child saint, Rosie finds his latest reading material:
But according the cover, this issue contains the greatest jokes literally of ALL TIME, you guys! Miguel's a budding comedian, a little jokester, he's just reading it for the humor!
Carmen's in Jacklyn's office when she notices she's just a kisser. She kisses one of her assistants right on the mouth, it just seems to be how she expresses affection and gratitude. Poor Carmen, Jacklyn's not in love with her at all! I kind of live in fear of people who kiss just to even say hello or goodbye, which is far too common in NYC and it stresses me right out. Carmen asks Jacklyn asks her about the kiss and Jacklyn admits she can't stop thinking about it and would like to explore their "connection." Is Carmen going to have an affair with her boyfriend's wife? She really should.
Jesse is slacking a bit in his job-hunting, which is irking Marisol. I'm a little confused why she didn't just place him as a maid in another home?
Carmen fills Sebastien in on his wife's interest. He wants her to lead Jacklyn on so he can walk in on it and finally get the divorce and all the money he wants. Classy, Sebastien. He sure is worth all this, Carmen! Anyway, she agrees to seduce his wife, but promises not to enjoy it. Famous last words.
Rosie visits Spence for help with Miguel. Spence is doing really well, going on lots of auditions, working out, eating healthy, booked a big commercial, goes to meetings all the time (hey, remember when Spence was an alcoholic for two weeks?). Spence agrees to chat with Miguel about the boobs magazine, which Spence flips through after Rosie leaves.
Sebastien gives Adrian the shocking news that not a lot of people want to buy his home since it was the site of a suicide, a murder, and a chopped-off legs. I guess it's a buyers' market!
Marisol tries to get Jesse hired at the country club, but the director there says he worked there before and she is not going to hire him again. He was fired for violating club rules, apparently, and it turns out the employee who complained about him was Louie Becker. You know, the dead guy.
Out for coffee, Zoila complains about Doctor Boyfriend doing her work. This utterly baffles Carmen. Why wouldn't you want someone to do your work for you? Marisol drops in and fills them in on the latest Jesse-related dirt. The girls are wondering if Jesse might actually have something to do with Louie's murder. Marisol insists she's not a detective, but Zoila points out that it didn't stop her from writing a book about snooping into other people's lives. It's kind of her thing! "Just Marisol his ass," she says.
The girls enjoy this.
Well, Marisol not so much.
Spence is having some park time with little Miguel, trying to counsel him through the horrors of looking at boobies in magazines. He tells Miguel that women are not objects, and Miguel asks how to get a girl to like him. "Tell her how you feel" is his advice, which is pretty lousy advice since it doesn't actually even remotely answer the question, but the point of the scene is that Miguel wants Spence to tell Rosie how he still feels.
Adrian scares the living crap out of poor little Deon by telling him about all the various deaths and body parts at the house. He responds by sleeping in the closet and tells Evelyn he doesn't want to live there anymore. Pretty sneaky, Adrian.
Zoila shows up to work... but another maid is already there! D'oh! Turns out she was Doctor Boyfriend's old maid and he hired her, which Genevieve was on board with to "help" Zoila while she's pregnant. Genevieve insists she's not a replacement, and that this arrangement will only last until Zoila has her baby. Hm.
Evelyn flips out at Adrian for having frightened Deon. Adrian admits that he doesn't want to get attached to another son, he doesn't want to open up the possibility of losing another one. Evelyn thinks Barrett would want them to move on, but tells Adrian he can either be a part of this or not; it's entirely up to him. Which is not exactly how fostering, adoption, or parenting work. At all. But these are the Powells!
Miguel tries to kiss Katy, who pretty much throws him across the room. Rosie thinks this is a bad thing? I don't know. More young ladies should respond to unwanted advances like that, if you ask me! I mean sure, she said she would kill him and dance in his blood, but come on, it was a METAPHOR!
Marisol shows up at Jesse's to cook and pretends to have "forgotten the chicken," like you do, so Jesse runs off to the store while she digs around his house.
Jacklyn and Carmen are having their "date." Jacklyn admits that she already knows Sebastien is having an affair, so Carmen shouldn't feel guilty about this. Sebastien texts and tells Carmen to stall, just as Jacklyn starts to make a move.
Carmen stalls by announcing she's a lush and downing a good portion of liquid courage.
Rosie fills Taylor in on what happened with the kids and confronts her about lying that Katy was from Argentina, not Mexico. Taylor explains that Katy witnessed her father's murder and the phrase she used was what the killers told her father. They're lying about her country of origin because the killers are looking for her since she was a witness. In other words, look out for Ernesto, Katy!
Carmen and Jacklyn's awkward date continues. Jacklyn admits she's always thought about trying something with a woman but could never go through with it until she met Carmen. "I love how honest you are," she says. Then she goes in for the big kiss.
....but Carmen backs away at the last second and says she wants to keep things professional. She tells Jacklyn she deserves to be happy as who she is, and that she should end her marriage if it's not making her happy. Okay seriously, what do she and Sebastien think is going to happen to Carmen's record contract if the two of them are together after the separation?
Just after Zoila catches Joy re-doing the cleaning she's already done, we cut to Marisol finding a gun under Jesse's bed. Because this is television, he walks in at that exact moment and she pulls the gun on him. He claims he bought the gun after having found that hand. They need protection! Apparently Louie made up lies about Jesse that got him fired and he had nothing to do with Louie's murder. Jesse says her exes have made her crazy and he kicks her out.
Sebastien comes home and calls Carmen, but oops! Carmen left her phone on the couch. Right next to Jacklyn, who is now finally putting all the pieces together.
Adrian calls a P.I. to try to track down Deon's birth parents.
Michael tells Marisol he thinks Taylor is having an affair. Meanwhile, Spence tells Rosie how heartbroken he was that Rosie bailed on him so easily after all he gave up for her, so she leaves. He immediately goes into the bedroom and look who's there!
Now, I do not for one second believe these two are having an affair, so I'm pretty psyched to find out what they are up to.