The Fosters: Lucky
I'll be brief but I thought I should at least acknowledge the season finale of The Fosters. Or the mid-season finale? Summer finale? I still can't quite figure out how it works.
I was kind of dreading sitting down for the episode after I flipped right out last week when Callie and Brandon "finally" had sex, and this week we were treated to rationalizations like "We didn't do anything wrong, we weren't even technically fostering you at the time!" (that gem via Brandon, naturally)
It is perhaps a little odd that Brandon considers himself to be part of the unit that was fostering Callie, as if sibling-fostering is a specific action verb, and he feels himself to be a fosterer of this teenage girl, maybe -- JUST MAYBE -- it's still gross that he boned her. And now he did literally bone his sister.
I guess? Because this being The Fosters, the big adoption celebration at the end could completely explode in the first episode of Season 3B because somebody somewhere forgot to cross a T or because it actually turns out Callie's bio-mom is alive. Really, what would this show's throughline be if not "a new wrench in Callie's adoption!"? I don't believe for a second that the show is going to abandon the creepy sexual tension between Brandon and Callie, so I imagine we'll have awkward scenes of Brandon getting an eyeful of his little sister in her skivvies, or super-sexy brushing-up-against-each-other moments in the family mini-van. And so help me if Callie ended up with an oopsie pregnancy... SO HELP ME. Well, I don't know what I'd do, since anything I would do is pretty much irrelevant to the storytelling and, also, these people aren't real. I think?
Let it not be said that my heebie-jeebies precluded a sense of humor! The look on Callie's face when she post-coitally walked into the kitchen and found out the adoption was going through after all because MAYBE POTENTIAL OUTCOMES ARE CALLED POTENTIAL AND NOT ABSOLUTE FOR A REASON (and should not lead one to sibling-sex)... well, it was hysterical.
I was delighted that she felt like an idiot for her behavior because, hey, her behavior was idiotic. Brandon barely registered an expression other than "hangdog" for the entire episode, but I'm not entirely sure how that distinguishes it from other episodes.
In other news, the show threatened to take Connor away from Jude as it seems he's moving to L.A. to live with his mother, who apparently gives him less pushback on the whole gay thing. I appreciated that they made it clear his father wasn't kicking him out -- as a parent struggling to accept his son's sexuality, he really is not that bad. He spent Father's Day at his son's boyfriend's house (with his son's boyfriend's lesbian parents), after all. Dude is making an effort! That's a lot more than plenty of LGBT kids can say about their parents, many of whom never move out of "denial" or "complete rejection."
Taking away #Jonnor, though? Cruelty!
Cruelty to the audience!
Who else do we need to check in on? Mariana! Mariana, after a heart-to-heart with her grandfather, decided she should tell Mat that she's not going to grovel or beg for his forgiveness anymore, because she's managed to forgive herself. I'm sure that made Mat feel a lot better! I don't actually recall any begging or groveling, so this didn't exactly feel like the cathartic, triumphant moment they were playing it as. But at least now Mat can sleep better at night knowing that Mariana no longer feels bad about cheating on him! Anyway, he kind of fabulously told her, "Okay cool, we're never getting back together but good for your emotional health" and walked out. Ouch! (But seriously, that's about the best she could expect after "Just letting you know I forgive myself for what I did to you, so let's reunite!")
Self-acceptance is a beautiful thing, Mariana, but maybe the people you've hurt aren't going to be as moved by your announcement of it as you think they are! "You're welcome, I forgive me!"
So Monte confessed directly to Lena that she's in love with her but would never try to get in the middle of a marriage which, listen Monte, I get that this episode celebrates honesty (in part) but actually confessing that you're in love with someone (and also telling people in their social circle about it) isn't the most respectful way to "not get in the middle of a marriage." It still implies: "By the way, you can have me if you decide you want me!"
This news did not thrill Stef. For some reason!
Lena and Stef hosted an anniversary party for Lena's parents in the middle of all this drama, at which point we're reminded that Lena's father and Lena's stepbrother are on the outs due to his having used a racial slur against her mother years ago that he won't even acknowledge. Also, STEF'S MAMMOGRAM WAS INCONCLUSIVE! Good grief, plot contrivances that are totally unnecessary! There was plenty of drama already! SETTLE DOWN, SHOW!
Anyway, everyone made up with the bro and Stef's health turned out fine, so Stef and Lena were inspired by that and the beauty of two of their children just having sexed it up with each other, and they made up. Nah, not really the part about their kids. They don't know about it. The show's saving that tasteless nugget for later (reminder to Callie: you already told Daphne, dumbass!). And while Stef and Lena's scenes together were great (and I can't say enough about how lovely Teri Polo and Sherri Saum are in these roles and with one another), it felt way too easy after a season of build-up.
It really was kind of an exhausting episode. Also, did you know a random audience of foster children are just allowed to go to family court to applaud someone whose vlog they watch? WELL THEY ARE.
Did you also know that Jesus has gotten really tall since he went to wrestling camp (wrestling summer school?), and has apparently already been kicked out? (It's okay, Jesus, your older brother has already proven this season that you can break all the rules, get kicked out, get re-admitted, break more rules, and still win!)
Honestly, I think the ultimate conclusion in the courthouse when the adoption finally gets green-lit would've actually conjured up some tears for me if last week (and the opening of last night's episode) hadn't been so revolting, but here we are. We'll see. Maybe. I'm running low on good will.