...then comes Trevor in a baby carriage and then comes another wedding because All My Children was in serious need of a splashy ceremony and they can't help it that the only couples on this show worth rooting for are already married!
Jake and Amanda's re-wedding gave us something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue:
- Something old: Jake and Amanda's marriage license. Oh, aside from that? Rylee. The wedding gave us some shameless Rylee pimping and oh, goodness, is that old. And also horrifying. But more on that later.
- Something new: Pine Valley's Mayor Blanco is a new (and welcome!) presence in Pine Valley.
- Something borrowed: Liza Colby's wardrobe was most certainly on loan from the Carly Corinthos Jacks collection, no?
- Something blue: My face, as in, "I am blue in the face from the ranting and raving I have done in several venues about how uber-silly it is that the writers tried so hard to create dramatic tension in a situation where the worst case scenario would be that nothing would change!"
Okay, so she wasn't at the wedding, so using her as the new is probably cheating but do you know how hard it is to come up with something new at a wedding where the participants are already married?! Watching the Mayor coldly and calmly strike the fear of God into Natalia was a delight, especially since she asked the question we've all wondered about: "Does Chief Hubbard make it a habit of using this department to settle his personal scores?"
It also gave us an actor and actress who were quite obviously having a ball, which is always nice to see, and some pretty wedding fashion. Really, all the buildup this wedding needed was a scroll at the bottom of the screen saying, "Tune in for Jake and Amanda's wedding. People will look pretty! Well, Chrishell Stause will look pretty. And other people...well, other people will also be wearing clothes."
She is utterly lovely. Part of me wants to hate her, but the other part of me realizes that she's too damn adorable to hate.
Adorable is not the descriptor I would use for some of these other dresses. Aside from Liza's "Carly Corinthos Jack IS Sharon Stone in the Port Charles Dinner Theater's production of The Production of Casino" look, there was...there was a big question and that question is why the hell do you go out of your way to make Rebecca Budig look like this?!
That is what we call a curly-headed rat's nest. A...crispy curly-headed rat's nest, at that. I am perplexed that nobody thought, during the hours it must have taken to tease her hair into that position (I refuse to say that's a style), "Um, why are we making her hair wider than her body"?