Okay, fancytime soap nerds, let's take a look at the Season 1 finale of Beacon Hill, shall we? I think the running time should allow this to be quick and painless. The weather outside in NYC right now suggests I might electrocute myself just for writing this, so don't ever suggest I don't love y'all, okay?
And we're off! Some part of me assumed that as the season finale (and the fact that we'll be waiting a full year for the next season), the episode would be super-sized. You know, like 13 minutes. Or even 10. I saw the progress bar and realized this was not the case. So hang onto your hats because a lot of everything and a lot of nothing will be happening!
I need to talk about the title cards real quick.
Is this a digital image of an eyeball or a vagina? I'm certain it's one or the other, but the graphics confuse me.
Anyway, we open on Tom Wesley driving and dialing his daughter. He leaves her a grumpy voicemail that she can't keep ignoring his calls. Don't worry, he's using a hands-free device of some sort.
Sara is working on her computer when her step-grandmother comes in to say hello. Oddly, she doesn't open with, "Hi, Nana!!"
Evelyn sits down to chat with Sara and tries to explain how much she and Sara's grandfather love each other. Sara is appropriately squicked by the idea of her grandfather being romantic with anyone, much less this young chesty thing. Sara gets a mysterious phone call and has to bolt, leaving Evelyn looking messy and sad. And busty.
Sara runs down the street in her cute hat taking a "very important call" from her editor.
It's my favorite kind of soap opera one-sided phone call, with vague references to an angry but out-of-line person on the other line demanding that some sort of unspecified deadline be met immediately. She will GET HIM HIS STORY, DAMMIT!
She knocks on a door. It's Katherine's door!
Sara goes in and Katherine gives her some coffee. It took way too long to play the obvious beat of Katherine remembering how Sara takes her coffee. Then they talk about how awkward this is, because why show when it's way quicker to tell and you only have seven minutes? Anyway, the basic idea is that Katherine wants to explore Sara's suggestion that they try to be friends. "You weren't just my lover, Kate," says Sara, "you were my best friend!" Do people still call each other their "lovers?" Honest question. I can't wait to use that expression soon.