Well, I sat down to watch today's One Life to Live, thinking it probably wouldn't do enough for me to actually do a write-up because today's bizarre "the shows got saved....kinda" news would overshadow everything, but I already flipped out about three times in the cold open. Jack, Shane, and Rex are face-to-face for the first time since Gigi's death, Viki and Dorian are face-to-face for the first time since Viki found out about Dorian stalling on getting Clint help during his heart attack, and most importantly, RHTodd actually said the words "that son of a bitch stole my life!" and I about jumped off my couch.
So I'm excited. So here we go, gang, it's an old-fashioned recap day, starting from immediately after the credits.
So, RHTodd is still talking to himself in his motel room trying to figure out how someone stole his life and nobody noticed. It's a fair question! But my favorite was: "And who the hell are Sam and Dani??" He needs someone to help him make sense of it, and notices Viki's name on The Banner website.
Viki and Dorian are awesomely bickering. Dorian mentions that Clint is guilty of every crime he confessed to, and Viki looks nervous since she knows the one exception (which, really, what he confessed to is enough for a healthy prison sentence regardless).
Destiny continues to play with a pregnancy test box.
Matthew's doctor explains that he was just joking about being out of options for Matthew, and just meant he couldn't stay at this hospital anymore. Bo and Nora get upset about sending him away until the doctor (a better one, mind you!) says there's a great facility in Philadelphia and the show remembers it takes place in a Philadelphia suburb, so that's totally not sending him away at all.
Ionia shows up to continue trying to seduce David.
Jack apologizes to Shane. Or sympathizes. Or something. It's hard to tell.
Commercials. Y'all. My dog smells so bad. I hate the idea of kicking her off the couch but it's really nasty. Where did the dog-walker take her today? A pig pen? I think he may have.