Serial Drama

Our Column in the 11/3 Issue of Soap Opera Digest

The newest issue of Soap Opera Digest is on newsstands now, and in it is our latest My Take/ My Take, Too column. This month, Mallory continues to be all atwitter about the crazy casting news hitting the soap world: Thorsten Kaye, Beth Ehlers, Aiden Turner and Greg Vaughan are out, while Jonathan Jackson and James Franco are in, and she is seriously embarrassed to think about how long it must have taken for our editor to get rid of the approximately eight thousand exclamation points she had in her original draft. Meanwhile, Becca tries optimism on for size, and thinks of how great Jonathan Jackson's return to GH could be, especially if it coincides with Greg Vaughan landing a gig on the increasingly good Days of Our Lives.

Our Latest Soap Opera Digest Column

My Take
By Becca Thomas

Another Daytime Emmys ceremony has come and gone, and I'm thrilled, confused, and irritated all at once. Thrilled because there was some seriously, seriously bad fashion on display, and it was oodles of fun to mock. And confused or irritated by...well, by virtually everything else.

First, the things that irritated me least. DAYS's Ava was written almost incomprehensibly (still irritating these many months later), but Tamara Braun worked wonders with what she was given, so I was happy for her Supporting Actress win (and she looked absolutely gorgeous--bonus!). Also on the DAYS front, I am always happy to see someone from my two shows win something, particularly if the show is DAYS, which, let's face it, rarely gets nominated, much less wins anything. So congrats to Darin Brooks (Max) on his Younger Actor win, though I remain a bit puzzled by his nomination. (And by his suit at the ceremony, but that is a discussion for a different day.)

GH's Julie Marie Berman should have won the Outstanding Younger Actress award last year, so while I didn't think she had the same level of material or performances this year, I'm happy for her make-up win. Perhaps the same logic will bring Kirsten Storms the award next year. She didn't even get a nomination last year when by all rights she should have won for her performance as Maxie mourning Georgie, but at least we're moving in the right direction.

Our Column in the 10/6 Issue of Soap Opera Digest

For our latest My Take/My Take, Too column, our editors asked us to share our thoughts about the Daytime Emmys. You may remember that we had thoughts--lots of them. After a substantial amount of time turning sentiments like "RAAAAAAGE" and "What is she weari--OH MY GOD, MY EYES" into actual sentences, excising curses and cutting our marathon list of complaints down to 500 words, our latest columns appear in the October 6th issue of Soap Opera Digest, on newsstands today.

Our Latest Soap Opera Digest Column

My Take
By Mallory Harlen

In crafting their latest front-burner romances, both AMC and GH have decided to think outside the box. Since their "inside the box" thinking misses far more often than it hits, it's unsurprising that their attempts at telling unconventional love stories leave a lot to be desired. Namely, entertainment and couples worth rooting for.

David Canary (Adam) and Melissa Claire Egan (Annie) are two of my very favorite performers on AMC and in all of soapdom, so I understand the show's impulse to put them in a story together. After all, if you add their levels of talent together, you get a sum of awesomeness so great that it quite nearly distracts you from how bizarre their pairing really is. When Annie saved Adam, and Adam decided that he could honor Stuart's memory by taking care of Annie, I got excited for a potential platonic relationship, equal parts sweet and hilarious. The AMC in my head is far better than the one on-screen because we were immediately treated to passionate kissing. And while their age difference is, um, noticeable, to say the least, it doesn't rank in the top five reasons why this story makes me uncomfortable (it's definitely the sixth reason, though). Is Annie playing him or not? That's a completely rhetorical question, by the way, and one I'm not sure even the writers have the answer for. If she IS playing him, that's disappointing, as Adam Chandler should not get played by anyone, except for possibly Erica Kane (Let's all take a moment to mourn what looked to be a fantastic, promising Erica/Adam romance. Oh, what could have been!), and he should certainly not get played by a woman who became psychotic because Ryan Lavery dumped her. Adam is many things, but he's not that sort of chump.

Our Column In The 8/25 Issue of Soap Opera Digest

The latest issue of Soap Opera Digest is on newsstands now, and features several interesting pieces, from the Sam/Jason cover story (The cover reads "Fans won't be disappointed!" We...seriously doubt that), to an article on AMC's move and an interview with Bryton James (Devon, Y&R) about his friendship with Michael Jackson, as well as our latest My Take/My Take, Too column. This month, Mallory appreciates that General Hospital and All My Children at least tried to be creative with their latest front burner romances, but is so unhappy with the Spinelli/Maxie, and Adam/Annie pairings that she wishes they hadn't bothered, while Becca asks the GH and Days of Our Lives writers two questions: (1) what's with all of the miscarriages and pregnant women in peril? and (2) why do you find these things entertaining?

Our Latest Soap Opera Digest Column

My Take
By Mallory Harlen

The economic recession has hit the soap world. Major stars are being fired or forced to take pay cuts, sets are being consolidated and now, in what appears to be the latest cost-cutting measure, soaps are even sharing storylines. Right? Both ALL MY CHILDREN and GENERAL HOSPITAL have simultaneously introduced twin sisters of now-dead characters who were sold at birth. I have to assume that the writers went to the Soap Opera Cliche Factory and decided to split the cost of the cheapest one available.

Krystal Carey selling one of her children at birth is not at all surprising to me; after all, she uses every child she comes into contact with as currency. The woman sees babies as meal tickets, not tiny humans. What IS surprising is that AMC felt we needed a replacement Babe on canvas so quickly. I was downright gleeful when she was written off the show, though my joy was short-lived, as she was eulogized on a daily basis for moths afterward. I'm reasonably sure that if you added up all of the times the show mentioned her, she'd still probably have the highest episode count of all AMC characters. The writers have decided to compound this Babe overload by introducing her twin. And having every conversation about her twin mention Babe in some way. And set up a romance between her twin and JR, Babe's ex-husband. The only thing saving this story so far is the introduction of Brittany Allen (Marissa), a fantastic actress who has great chemistry with virtually every character in Pine Valley. And Marissa is markedly less awful than her sister, although she does share Babe's self-righteous streak: I can't help but be annoyed when she lectures people about their hatred of David. Sure, parental devotion is nice and all, but maybe she should check out dear old dad's criminal rap sheet before she starts defending him.

Our Column in the 7/28 Issue of Soap Opera Digest

Our latest My Take/My Take, Too column is in the newest issue of Soap Opera Digest, which is on newsstands now. Mallory questions the wisdom in two ABC soaps featuring the same "A popular character died. Don't despair, though: her unknown twin, who was sold at birth, is now in town romancing her love interest!" story at the same time. Her biggest query, as ever, is...how does anyone, anywhere, find this entertaining?  Meanwhile, Becca worries that Days of Our Lives and its penchant for slow-moving stories and poorly paced romances will botch the returns of the ever-awesome Wally Kurth and Crystal Chappell.

Our Latest Soap Opera Digest Column

My Take
By Becca Thomas

I am not anti-villain. I love a soapy bad guy or girl. I have adored DAYS OF OUR LIVES’ Victor Kiriakis and his malevolent deeds since acid-washed jeans were popular the first time around. And one of Victor’s worst enemies, Stefano DiMera? Who doesn’t root for him, at least a little bit, every time he comes back from the dead to wreak havoc? Then there’s GENERAL HOSPITAL’s Helena Cassadine, who is a kidnapper, brainwasher, and murderer many times over. Yet I love her! I could go on for pages with examples of my solidly pro-villain stance. And I also understand that even good guys have to have some villainous qualities now and then, to keep things interesting. But lately with Luke Spencer, GENERAL HOSPITAL has replaced what was a layered and interesting sometime villain with an unrepentant jerk who has lost all rootability in my eyes.

Our Latest Soap Opera Digest Column

My Take
By Mallory Harlen

During many dark days, when watching and entire episode of ALL MY CHILDREN and GENERAL HOSPITAL was physically painful (that sounds like a melodramatic thing to say, but I swear that those shows caused some killer headaches), I said to myself, "At least I have Zach/Kendall and Patrick/Robin. They could never disappoint me."

I suppose it's my fault for putting that out into the universe, because the writers seized upon that like a dare. "You'd think that, wouldn't you? But you'd be so very wrong." It's gotten so bad that I involuntarily shudder when I see either of those couples mentioned in the episode description on my DVR.

Zach and Kendall imploding, again, after some random, ridiculous threat to their marriage is worse this time than it usually is, and since I've spilled a lot of ink complaining about how bad it usually is, this is saying something. Zach, put off by the fact that his wife wasn't her usual self after coming out of a coma during which Zach fathered a child with her sister, and killed her brother, seemed to resent being in the same room as Kendall. Kendall, for her part, fell headfirst into one of her Ryan obsessions and became a curly-haired bundle of neuroses and desperate declarations of love. Throw in Zach and Liza's sleazy dalliance and you have a recipe for viewers tuning out. Charles Pratt seems to have an understanding of some Pine Valley residents--his writing for Adam and Erica is truly inspired and, unlike his predecessors, he's giving Aidan actual storylines, which is nice to see, but his writing for Zach and Kendall is bizarre. Why he decided that these hugely popular characters just weren't cutting it and needed to be rewritten is completely beyond me.

Our Column In The 6/2 Issue of Soap Opera Digest

The latest issue of Soap Opera Digest is on newsstands now and features our latest My Take/My Take, Too column. This month, Mallory recalls the pain of two of her favorite couples in all of soapdom being ruined by All My Children and General Hospital because of the writers' ineptitude, while Becca compliments GH and Days (for real!) for their expert character rehabilitation and is grateful that Sam McCall and Sami Brady are watchable again.

Also in this issue: a summer preview, interviews with David Canary and Julia Barr, a retrospective of Stuart Chandler's history in Pine Valley and an amusing look at soap characters born in May, made all the more hilarious that AMC's Amanda and Colby, and Y&R's Adam were born in 1992, 1999, and 1995, respectively. Oh, SORAS, you crazy devil.