Spin This Off, Losers

There will be days when I am totally high self esteemy and think nothing can bring me down and then I remember that Brian Frons is the head of ABC Daytime, and then I get depressed. I have no idea how a man so hopelessly, gloriously inept is not only allowed to keep his job, but also take on new responsibilites. It's almost like giving a toddler a gallon of gasoline and a lighter, except the toddler will not do anything stupid with them. Big news at SOAPNet indicates the people in charge are both dumb at their basest level and also about four years behind pop culture trends.

The network also acquired rights to the young-skewing prime-time soaps "The O.C" and "One Tree Hill" from Warner Bros. Domestic Cable Distribution. Those contemporary shows should also appeal to young viewers.

The same "The O.C." that just got cancelled because no one watches it? And the same "One Tree Hill" that everybody mocks just for existing and also stars the loathsome Chad Michael Murray and for the love of God, why must the world need to be exposed to him on multiple channcels?

"We speak to `General Hospital' viewers on both SoapNet and ABC on a daily basis and we easily direct them to this special `GH: Night Shift' series," he said. "Then we don't have to buy billboards, we don't have to have helicopters dragging signs across the sky."

I...have no idea what that means. What do helicopters have to do with anything? You don't need to advertise a show because there's a show like it on a totally different channel?

Unlike daily soaps, most "GH: Night Shift" plots will be wrapped up in a single episode.

Do these people not understand what a soap opera is? 

The show will be hipper than most daytime soaps and understandable to those who don't watch "General Hospital," Ms. Blackwell said. Although no contracts with actors have been finalized, the show features several characters who are the grown children of longtime residents of the fictional town of Port Charles.

Saying that something will be hipper than most daytime soap operas is like saying that someone is younger than the old lady from Titanic. And shoving "the grown children of longtime residents" into this bizarre random show is so a transparent ploy to get anybody who isn't Sonny off of GH. I just don't get it! This makes no sense to me! When are they going to air these new shows? Someone help me understand!

- Promising Ingénue

Comments

[Evil But Twinless]

I sort of love that they're just giving up on GH, especially for young viewers, and are just going to start a crappy daily non-soap with some of the same people on it and hope for the best. Because anything is better than what's there now.

It's incredibly bizarre, but also in keeping with what lots of people think, which is that the networks are intentionally killing off the soaps.

BTW, a spin-off of GH targeted at younger viewers, with shorter story arcs? Didn't they already try that once? Wasn't it called Port Charles?