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« OMG, Patrick and Robin 4evah!!1!1!!! | Main | The Day's Dumbest Dialogue »

February 25, 2007

Violence Really Is The Answer Sometimes!

I know that Kevin didn't actually try to kill Colleen this time around and all of this will lead to a long, drawn out "Cruel, cruel world, how dare you misjudge Kevin, he's a good man!" storyline, but not even that can put a damper on the brilliant, brilliant scene where Brad clocked him in the face:



Most of that scene sucked, quite frankly. Michael hating on the Abbotts even though his family is full of soul-sucking criminals? Taunting Jack for being against the entire world? Bitch, please. And where does Victor get off lecturing Jack about hospitals not being the place for personal vendettas? Three quarters of Victor's life is spent being part of a vendetta against someone. Usually Jack! So suck it, Newman!

But Brad punching Kevin in the face will make me smile for hours, if not days. I am mostly amused by how he came OUT OF NOWHERE. Hilarious! It's even better than the face Jack made when he learned that Colleen was once again locked in a freezer that was set on fire. If there's one thing Don Diamont does well (and there is only one thing), it's anger.

I can only hope, wish and pray with all of the fervor my tiny, black heart can muster that one day Brad will appear out of nowhere to punch Amber in the face. I know it's bad to actively wish for violence against a woman, but please, she wears so many layers of makeup that his fist probably won't make contact with her skin.

I cannot stand her presence on this show. I don't understand why the producers and writers are so besotted with her that they feature her every single day and I certainly don't understand why they thought it was a good idea to make the story of Jill's long lost son about Amber rather than, you know, about Jill and Katherine. I mean, why spend a few episodes on legacy characters in a major life-changing situation when you can just have them learn huge information on the phone?

I swear to you, the scene of Amber doing a striptease (<--LINK NOT SAFE FOR LIFE) was quite possibly the least sexy thing I have seen in my entire life, aside from a mesh shirt. And the wedding that followed was the most ridiculous thing I've seen in daytime that didn't include a virtual garden of Eden or pronouncements of Sonny Corinthos being a good man. I would rather watch Peter Bergman read the phonebook than watch these scenes---okay, I'm a certified Peter Bergman stalker, so that's not saying much. I'd rather watch Christel Khalil's version of Lily perform Shakespeare than watch these scenes. I know, right? Scary.

The thing is that Adrianne Frantz is so appallingly out of place. I mean, really, aside from the aforementioned Christel Khalil, the cast members on this show are either awesome or have been around too long to get rid of, so to see her with them is jarring. Like, you'll be watching a scene all "Peter Bergman, Michelle Stafford, that's cool, oh, hey, Christian LeBlanc, that's awesome...who's the skank?" I know she has a Daytime Emmy or whatever, but honestly, she's lost her talent and whenever she's onscreen, all I can smell is skank. She and Deidre Hall seem to be under the assumption that soaps are the new pornos. Between her bleached and stick straight hair to her extreme makeup to the wannabe Marilyn Monroe singing to the president breathiness she has going on, she just makes no sense.  It's totally beyond me why they continue to feature her at every opportunity in every storyline on the show, but had to fire Eileen Davidson because there were no stories for her.

- Promising Ingénue


she just makes no sense. It's totally beyond me why they continue to feature her at every opportunity in every storyline on the show, but had to fire Eileen Davidson because there were no stories for her.

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