Unacceptable! Days of Our Lives Week in Review

While the day-to-day writing on Days has improved immensely, the storylines have stopped moving forward with any regularity, and a number of unacceptable things are happening.  These unacceptable occurrences include:

• How unbelievably hot James Scott is despite the fact that E.J. is a felonious nutjob.  (Also unacceptable is that as a result, I am starting to understand how people are fans of Sonny on GH.)

• That they seem to be heading towards a Celeste/Abe romance.  Now, I always thought Abe seemed too old for Lexie, and they weren't an especially sparkling couple (oh my god, that impotence storyline was the worst thing ever), but sleeping with your possibly-dead-daughter's husband is so skeevy it's off the skeeviness spectrum.  Not to mention that Celeste's "accent" should disqualify her from ever getting any action.  
• Kate's two-tone hair. WTF is going on with this?  It reminds me of Katie Holmes' hair during the last season of Dawson's Creek.  It was so awful. (Aw, remember when the most disturbing things about Katie Holmes' life were her hair color and that she could pretend to be attracted to this?  Good times, man.)
• That one kiss, in a mental institution, is the most Steve and Kayla hooking up we've had for months.  I hate to say it, but my favorite soap couple of all times has gotten boring.  This is the most unacceptable of unacceptableness, and must be remedied immediately.  I want to lock the writers in a room with a bunch of YouTube clips of Steve and Kayla scenes from the 80s on a constant loop until they come to their senses and start taking full advantage of the talent and chemistry of these actors.  Have they never seen the roof sex? Their wedding when Kayla reveals halfway through that she got her voice back?  Steve rescuing Kayla from Jack when he was poisoning her?  All those conversations on the pier?  You shouldn't be able to become a Days writer if you haven't seen those scenes.  They're like the SATs of daytime drama.  Study up, scribes!  
• How quickly Phillip and Kate got to and from the almost-deserted island where Shawn and Belle are.  I thought Shawn had to basically build a boat out of coconuts, or something, for them to "escape"?  How awesome would it be if he and Belle are just so stupid that they didn't know there's an international airport on their quaint little archipelago?  Hell, they're probably on Kauai.
• That Willow continues to exist.  Would someone please make that stop?
• That Lucas and Will got haircuts but Max did not.  Does the actor who plays Max hang out with Steve Burton?  I think he does, and I think it's uncool how they're plotting against my happiness.
• That Matthew Ashford was only back for two episodes.
• This outfit.  Is that a cow-print bustier?  Unbreak my heart, Days wardrobe department.
• How unconvincing the [hopefully] temporary recast of Abby was - except when she appeared to be flirting with her onscreen father.  That was disturbingly convincing.

Screencaps courtesy of Days of Our Lives 2.

- Evil But Twinless

Comments

[Anonymous]

I usually agree with everything you guys have to say, but it is completely UNACCEPTABLE to ever criticize Celeste.

EVER.

[Anonymous]

Aw, HELL no. Do NOT compare my hot, marvelous sociopath with layers to that greasy, stuttering, midget mobster. That's just so many levels of wrong.

[soapunk]

Matt Ashford was only back for 2 episodes? I tuned in here and there and for the last 2 episodes all i saw him do was knock on Abbys door and ask her what was "going on in there".
What a waste.