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« Night Shift Episode 3: Paternity Ward | Main | General Hospital Week in Review »

July 28, 2007

Days of Our Lives Week in Review

I will admit I am increasingly grumpy lately, but this show has moved far away from awesome again, hasn't it?  As we've said around here before, it's so hit or miss.  The daily dialogue is much better than it was a year ago, and I don't routinely want to throw stuff at my TV, but I don't look forward to it like I was a couple of months ago.  Mostly I think the suckage of the Touch the Sky and Vegas storylines has finally trumped the fabulous of the veterans and the Brady/DiMera story. 


I will start with the absolute worst.   I think you know of what I speak.  That guest "star."  (I don't want to use his name because I fear the people who will land here pursuant to Google searches for him.  We must keep this place pure as the driven snow, as it always has been.)

I am one of those snobs who thinks that the guest star's show contributes to the dumbing down of America.  However, I am also one of those cheesy reality TV junkies who was slightly won over by him on Dancing With the Stars.  But why did they have him contaminate my soap?  Why?  In a story that managed to 1) disgustingly involve a freshly-used glass eyeball as a good luck charm, 2) feature twin extras that could not even stand still convincingly, 3) mock head injuries, 4) display acting abilities from said guest star on par with my grade-school nativity pageant, and 5) make blackjack the classiest and most watchable thing in a scene?


It's like the showrunners can't get used to not being the subject of ridicule.  When you make the Best Week Ever website, and in your case "best" is being used ironically, you're in trouble.  You might as well start gearing up for another island full of un-dead people.

Okay, enough about the unnamed guest star.  On to his scene partner, Nick.  Sigh.  I don't know much about head injuries (other than that Dana Carvey's oozing head injury character on SNL engenders in me the closest thing to a perfectly equal blend of guffawing and cringing I can identify), but is one of the symptoms being really hammy?


Ugh.  If it's true that everything that happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, does that mean the show can leave all the younger set's storylines there?


I don't know when it happened, but I adore Bo now.  I've become a Peter Reckell fangirl.  Between his hilarious streaking bit, his bantering with Hope, his ability to make even bets about diapering a baby interesting, I just can't get enough of Bo and Hope scenes.  What a turnaround from a year ago.

His post-streaking scene was high comedy, especially because it looked like Kristian Alfonso was trying to keep a straight face, and Josh Taylor lost that battle if he even tried to fight it.


Hee.  Also hilarious was Bo's incredulity over Hope thinking EJ is "gorgeous."  "He’s a criminal!"  Ha!  I like that they have the characters starting to say the stuff that's totally obvious to us as the viewing public.  First person to say something about Marlena's moaning and gasping wins a baby-diapering bet!



Lucas: That's it.  I'm taking the DiMeras down, if I have to do it with my bare hands.

Uh, okay Lucas.  You get right on that.

This 'roid-rage version of Lucas does nothing for me.  Lately, all his devotion to Sami manifests itself in aggression and over-the-top sex chat.  It's so tiresome to watch.  And EJ gets all the good lines: 

EJ (after the bombing):  I think we should play a game of hearts.  Do you want me to deal?  Do you have some cards?

Heh.  But even this story, which I'm otherwise enjoying, didn't seem to move forward much this week.  Sure, Stefano kidnapped Sami, but clearly they're not going to have her have stillbirths at this point, right?  So where's the suspense?  I can't believe I'm saying this about a story involving Stefano, Andre, Tony, Sami, EJ, a private plane equipped as a hospital, stem cells, briefcases rigged with ether, exploding flowers, and the Brady/DiMera feud,but:  Eh.

I am still liking the Colleen/Santo story (with the obvious caveat that the mustache is still laughably terrifying). 


They should have replaced at least a half dozen of the Vegas scenes with Ireland ones.


If you are the children of two hugely popular couples, and you’ve been together on and off for years, and you have a child together, and you've been through all kinds of crazy soapy shenanigans to get together, shouldn't your marriage proposal make for better viewing than, say, Lindsay Lohan's craptastic new movie?  (Sorry, as a blogger I am contractually obligated to mention Lohan this week.)


Shawn and Belle, man.  Those two make me long for the days of Lucas and Carrie, or Steve and Marina, or even Shane and Kayla. 



Stephanie:  Jeremy would never cheat on me.

Why are they writing Stephanie, the child of two very smart (in different ways) people, as a moron?  Steph, smarmy things Jeremy would totally do:

Have I mentioned how much I hate the stupid Touch the Sky and related Vegas storylines?


It's not my imagination -- they are managing to make even Steve and Kayla boring, right? 


This baby storyline is going nowhere good.  You can say that about virtually any baby-related storyline on soaps (there is practically a rule written in indelible Sharpie marker that "baby equals lazy writing"), but I'm especially worried about this one. 


John and Marlena continue to confound.  I "love" how they took a break from looking for her kidnapped pregnant daughter to make out and giggle.  And then he SMACKED HER ON THE ASS.  I cannot adequately describe my reaction to their scenes anymore; I need a visual aid.


Roman: Stefano's plane is cruising the air space between Grand Cayman and Bermuda.
EJ: Well that’s great. They're not far!

Okay seriously, once and forever, where the hell is Salem?!

Screencaps courtesy of Days of Our Lives 2.


Okay, okay, I hear you about Shawn and Belle...but I think you've got a Nick style head wound (the kind that the love of your life doesn't notice despite the bandage) if you think watching Shane and Kayla would have been better.

I beg to differ. John and Marlena's make-out scenes are disgusting! But that smack on the ass was so funny! LOL! Like in a bad way funny... but funny.

I love Bo and Hope's talk that led to the streaking. They're so natural.

And yay!!! BILLIE!!!!

I also liked Nick/China Lee! LOL! Keep her!

Yep, Steve and Kayla are well on their way to being boring. Which sucks. The haven't had a really good story since their return and now they're going to be saddled with a baby. No way will that be any good.

Shawn and Belle will never not suck.

I made the terrible, terrible mistake of shutting my eyes while John and Marlena made out in Sami and Lucas's apartment.

Never, ever shut your eyes. It makes the sounds LOUDER. What is Drake putting into Diedre Hall's mouth that is making her produce that much saliva?

I was just watching an episode with John and Marlena in it... I think that was yesterday's... while they were flirting in the couch kissing while Marlena's daughter is missing.

John says something like, "How about one for the road?" or whatever... and then Marlena went like, "Oh baby..." went in for the kiss and John said, "Just kidding..."

THEN MARLENA DID THIS HILARIOUS EXPRESSION... lol!!! it was a series of fast gasps and moans! LOL! It was freaking hilarious... I wish I can describe it more catchy... but it was... Marlena went like.. "Ooh ah-ah.. ooh..." in a fast way...

Okay, I love EJ to a fault so it pains me to say this, but...the epitome of what a bad week it was on this show can be found in the fact that EJ is standing in Sami & Lucas's recently bombed apartment (like 5 minutes ago recently) and, upon noticing and then asking out loud if his briefcase is beeping, proceeds to OPEN IT claiming he knows what he is doing. Thus releasing the poisonous ether that knocks them all out cold.

Ummm...okay. I can put up with a lot. But absolutely not the dumbing down of EJ. That is solely Lucas's job.

Okay... may I please post these pics becaus they are truly hilarious...

Josh Taylor is hilarious and I know you hate him.


I can't capture it perfectly but this is that Marlena gasping and moaning quickly scene thing...

and finally...

Scary and obnoxious couple, I know... but hilarious... Period.

Thanks for entertaining me!

Will someone please explain to me why the hell Bo was streaking? I haven't been watching the show. Because well it sucks.

Mmmk!! Anna told Bope that Tony is back and she wants to talk to Roman. When she left, Bope realized that Anna is going to (well, I don't know if this is the right word) dump Roman. Hope thinks Roman will be devastated. Bo thinks Roman will be happy. They betted on it and Hope won!!! So Bo went around the parking lot naked... twice. Hilarious scene.

LOL! Love at the "Massive Headwound Harry" reference. And you're right, 'lazy writing' just about sums up the show these days. The writers don't feel like giving Bo & Hope, J&M or S&K a real story. So, Bo & Hope make bets (sorry, I wasn't a fan of those), J&M just kiss all the time, and S&K have a once-a-week discussion about having a baby. Thanks writers... let me know when you feel like giving any of these people an actual story. In the meantime, I'll skip watching you destroy my favorite characters by giving them no real dialogue and having all their screentime turn into makeout sessions, even when they're worried about their daughter.


That's just wrong.

I would rather watch EJ deal Hearts to Sami and Luke than a) John and Marlena macking on the couch, b) Shawn and Belle in general and c) anything involving the Vegas storyline.

The Steve and Kayla baby storyline is such a transparent setup to have them discover Mimi and Philip's baby. Ugh. If there is one baby that needs to just stay in the attic, it is that one.

I don't mean to bring up the awful, awful past... but I have always wondered what happened with that storyline. I was watching, but then the writing got so bad, I HAD to leave. So, the last thing about that story that I recalled was them (Belle, Shawn, Mimi, Philip) finding out that the eggs had been switched. I came back to find Mimi gone, a new Shawn, & Philip in bandages, I think. Then I left again, & only came back just recently for the vets! Okay, so can someone please quickly fill me in on what happened? My questions include: Where did those babies go? What happened to Mimi & Shawn's love (I am sure it fell apart b/c he found out she knew about his baby-- how did he find out?) What was Willow's deal (Shawn's rebound? Who's baby was that)? I thought Philip & Belle were married, what happened there? I guess she left him (& started actually loving her kid) once she found out the truth. I don't hate Philip b/c I feel bad for him, he didn't know (right?).

& anything else you wouldn't mind telling me to get me caught up would be awesome. I thank you in advance.

I never thought I'd enjoy Bo so much. It's like they've finally realized that Peter Reckell is a gigantic doofus and decided to run with it. And it's so nice to see Bo and Hope happy together again.

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