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« Oh, Kirsten | Main | And They Don't Call Cabs Because . . .? »

September 11, 2007

FYI

Here's the thing: when a character is imprisoned for a crime they did not commit, it's incredibly soapy and dramatic and you rage against the machine for putting them in jail and you rejoice when they come out.

But when a character is convicted of a crime that they ACTUALLY COMMITTED, it's sort of hard to swallow them being treated like some sort of martyr who has no reason at all to be in that horrible nasty prison because...just, because!

I'm not sure that the Y&R writing staff actually gets this, so I am just going to say it bluntly: Phyllis is not, I repeat NOT, Jesus.

You'd think it would be common sense that a scheming, lying, paternity test falsifying attempted murderer would not be mistakable for a messiah, but lately it's apparent that the powers-that-be don't know the difference.

In their own words...

Nick: Yeah, she was on the phone when she wasn't supposed to be, and, uh, now she lost her phone privileges.

Michael: For how long?

Nick: I don't know. I didn't even get to tell her that her daughter isn't sick anymore

Ohmigod, you mean to tell me that if you don't follow the rules in jail, you lose privileges? Shocking! Poor Phyllis! How was she supposed to know that this was the case? Prison has such a reputation for being a nonstop party, I can see where they all got confused.

Um, all I-- all I want is a stamp and an envelope to send a letter to my family. Just--is that a lot to ask?

You can't do that! He's bringing my baby!


Sir, I can't do this without my family! I need--I need my family, Sir. I need my family here, please! Please, Sir, I need to have somebody from my family here!

Y'know, I didn't think I could dislike a version of Phyllis more than Coquettish Giggle Phyllis, But "NOT WITHOUT MY DAUGHTER!" Phyllis is completely eclipsing her.

Michael: Nicholas and Phyllis should never have been separated. Now they're gonna be apart for God knows how long.

Nick: You know, seeing her in that place today was... it was awful. You wanna know what the worst part is? It's that I can't do anything about it

I mean, seriously, what the hell? I can see this level of heartbreak and outrage if Phyllis had been imprisoned for something she didn't do. And, yeah, it's lame that she finally, after many years of criminal activity, got nailed for something as minor as blackmailing freaking Brad, especially since everybody should be legally allowed to do something bad to Brad on a daily basis, but STILL! She DID IT! And then on top of that, she was stupid enough to get caught with a wig to wear during an attempt to flee the country. So she's a felon and also a dumbass.

I'm just...I'm just exhausted with Phyllis, is all. I love Phyllis--she's been one of my favorite characters on this show for forever and I ADORE Michelle Stafford beyond all reason. I love her fashion sense and her talent and her hair and I even overlook the whole Scientology thing when it comes to her and Sharon Case (and I never overlook the Scientology thing!). But I am overdosing on Phyllis, in the bad way. According to SON, she's been onscreen in 118 of 172 through the end of August. And when she's not onscreen, she's the biggest topic of conversation, so we can't even get an hour without hearing her mentioned. I just need, like, a week without Phyllis being seen or heard. Maybe two...but I'll settle for one.

(Peter Bergman was also in 118 of 172 episodes, but I am okay with that. Why? Because I'm a big old infatuated hypocrite, that's why)

This is unrelated to the above, but so glaringly stupid that I need to comment:

Nick: Right. Okay. Yeah, my brain is mush right now.

Yeah, the whole "wife going to jail" thing mushes one's brain almost as much as the AMNESIA YOU HAD UP UNTIL, LIKE, YESTERDAY AFTER DYING (EXCEPT NOT) IN A PLANE CRASH. Did they just forget about the convenient amnesia? What the hell?

Comments

And you didn't even use the word schadenfreude once!

Did Guza move over to Y&R too? I knew showing Y&R on SoapNet would prove to be a bad move.......

See, the lovely thing about Jack is that Jack's not all about Jack...even when Jack IS all about Jack. Or maybe I'm a big old infatuated hypocrite too, because I've been in love with Jack since...uhhh...pretty well always. I can't remember a time when I wasn't.

I think, as far as screentime goes, it's not just the number of shows appeared on, but how much of the time during the show that is sucked up by the character, and exactly how many characters are sitting there useless, with their hands tied, propping the character up when they could in fact be doing something much more interesting.

And as much as Phyllis has had her own circus of propping characters lately, I don't think she comes close to the Jason Morgan show, or even the Lulu Spencer show that has taken over GH.

True, smirks. Phyllis has a small core of people who pimp her, as opposed to two-thirds of the show's cast...flip side, the show's only showing that core of people most of the time as well, so the result is still Way Too Much Phyllis In Your Face.

Phyllis is sort of a combo of Carly and Jason from GH. What could be more awful than that? SCIENTOLOGY! Never let that slide by unprotested!!! Sorry, but that is a ridiculous cult. Charging idiots to be better at their so called religion that includes bogus little mind reading contraptions and hideous lies. Their "psychiatry is satan" museum in LA makes me want to start a religion of my own......COMMON SENSE ISMOLOGY!!!!

Maybe Guza is one too. Maybe the horrible dreck he writes for GH is based on his love and devotion to L Ron Hubbard's crappy sci fi writings. Just a possible explanation for such garbage.

Y&R is a mess due to one evil influence. The sheer ugly monotone boredom that is Victor Newman. I blame it all on him. One thought of him and my insomnia is cured. He literally induces sleep!!!!! And that face, voice, and hair....icky.

Maybe Guza's favorite film is that John Travolta excrement Battleship Earth or whatever that Scientology movie was called. Loons, all of them, wackos!!!!

Autism is a lie fabricated by psychiatrists?!?!?!?! WTF! Wake up people. Seriously, look into it for yourselves. Scientology consider it another mental condition created by charlitains trying to ruin society and drug people to death for who knows what supposed insane purpose.

King Scientologist John Travolta and Queen Beard Scientologist Kelly Preston's son Jett is reported to have autism. He gets no treatment for it beyond what Scientology reccommends. Alleged, yes. But some evidence does exist, and regardless any child with autism needs and deserves real medical care.

I ranted, but this powerful cult needs to be exposed. And Phyllis needs to shut up and do her damn time. And Genoa City needs to wake up and smell a little tiny bit of reality.

First, I love Phyllis. She comes on the screen and there's energy. Her wheels are always turning. Even when I hated her, I loved her. Michelle Stafford has insane chemistry with everyone. She's magnetic. I really don't care to watch the show when she's not on. Consider what we're left with if there's no Phyllis story--Amber, Janna, and the ever-boring Lily and Devon. So, I don't mind all the screen time Phyllis has been getting. What annoys me is that, yeah, she's not the noble heroine, but the writers seem to have a incurable case of let's get Phyllisitis. In the last few months they've had Phyllis give birth in an elevator during an ice storm, be indirectly responsible for Drucilla taking a leap, lose Nick in a plane crash, have Nick come back with no recollection of their relationship, be on trial for blackmailing Brad instead of kicking his ass like we all want to do, and going to jail for it. Oh, and don't forget that she's got a daughter who's sickly and possibly not Nick's, and she's got a porn-addicted son who's flunking out of school, getting a divorce and facing his own criminal charges that include murder. Poor Phyllis. Maybe she can get some rest in jail.

Michelle Stafford and Sharon Case are Scientologists???!!! I feel so...dirty now. Excuse me, I'm going to go cry quietly in a corner for a while. This is the reason why I should stop paying attention to behind-the-scenes details and just enjoy (or hate, depending on the day) what I see on my screen.

I seriously thought you were talking about JasonBorg on GH. I had to re-read the Phylis is not Jesus line a couple of times to reorient my mind.

Did soaps used to be good or was I just young?!

We had to be young......they couldn't have possibly gotten this crappy in such a short period of time...could they?

Michelle Stafford rocks..I have always loved her work..but too much of a good thing is like well that song "Umbrella" ...overplayed and ANNOYING!

I watch for one reason and one reason only...Phyllis!! The rest of the s/l's are crap and bore me, bore me, bore me!!

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